To wear a stunning figure hugging dress to a close friends wedding

[user1498221998]

My friend and I were both 16 stone this time 2 years ago. We both went on a diet and two years ,later I am now 10 stone and a size 10. She is still 16 stone and a size 18.

It's her wedding next Saturday and I showed my intended outfit to my Mum who said that while it looked beautiful I should wear something plainer and less figure hugging as almost everyone there hasn't seen me for over a year, doesn't know about my weight loss and I will attract too much attention away from the bride with my huge weight loss.

Do you think my Mum is right?

My friend will look beautiful anyway, so I don't see why I should have to deliberately look plain for her wedding!

My mum says it's 'rubbing it in' because she desperately wanted to be slim for her wedding. But that is not my fault.

Congrats on the weight loss.

The Kate Middleton dresses are great. The one you posted, even if longer and maroon, is a no go because of all the lace peekaboo going on. Nothing to do with the bride or her feelings, just looks tacky for a wedding, fine for other occasions. Even if it's not quite as bad as that, it's seems tacky. Without the sheer lace stuff, fine.

A summer wedding gives you a chance to wear florals, pastels, floaty, lots of things that don't work in colder months. You might want to take advantage of that.

Bodycon, if the dress is advertised as that, probably Means a dress for clubbing, and you will stand out as tacky at a wedding. It may shout look at me, and perhaps that was what your mom meant. But if it's more like the Kate look, go for it.

I doubt your friend will care as she will be caught up with being the bride. Why not ask her or other good friends who can actually see the dress if they think it's wedding appropriate?

Of course there are weddings where tacky is the norm, then it won't matter what you wear, but elegant is best for a wedding, not body con. Elegant can certainly be figure hugging, because it's cut well. Quality fabric, no mesh panels or peek a boo, no plunging necklines even if covered with lace.

Buy a few nice dresses! You deserve it!

Man of kent

Start dirty dancing with the bride's father? Are you serious? Why not sleep with half the congregation whilst she is there, do a free strip tease after the speeches. Really? Is this advice supposed to be helpful?

It does not matter if your big or small, the important thing is the lack of care or respect OP has for her 'friend' that all she seems to care about is the weight loss and nothing else.

Definitely wear it - why would anyone choose to look intentionally frumpy for a wedding?
She, like you, had plenty of time to lose weight but it sounds that she's not that concerned about body image and therefore it would be ridiculous of her to be offended by your choice of attire.
We'll done for achieving your goal - don't let anyone put you down or make you feel guilty for it x

Hopefully not this one:
www.google.co.uk/search?q=naa+naa+maroon+dress&rlz=1C9BKJA_enCH597CH597&oq=naa+naa+maroon+dress&aqs=chrome..69i57.12553j0j7&hl=en-GB&sourceid=chrome-mobile&ie=UTF-8#imgrc=fXBzuenR2DM-KM:

If it's by Naa naa, no way. They are for clubbing and showing off, definitely a long way from elegant.

And you don't want to be going naa naa anyway!

I don't think you should wear a figure hugging dress, well done on your weight lose you have done amazing and do have the right to show it off but this is your friends day and as amazing as everyone will think she looks she will probably be really self conscious, as seen as she wanted to loose weight before the wedding and hasn't and you wearing a figure hugging dress could upset her and ruin her day, is it really worth the risk?

Start dirty dancing with the bride's father? Are you serious?

No, he was trying to make a joke. It was toe curling, really Dadlike. If he weren't dead I would swear my own father was sockpuppeting on this thread.

I don't understand, there used to be cool men on here. Jovial, warm, kind and with something worthwhile to say. @PigletJohn, come back, we need you. But lately, the calibre has just dropped to mud level.

you people are the reason men don't want to engage with feminism

No, we are not the reason for anti-feminist men. Trust me.

And don't worry about us scaring him off from engaging in feminism. He wasn't trying to.

Wow this escalated quickly! I think the dress yoI've described sounds lovely and very appropriate. If you'd posted about the dress and not mentioned the weight loss no one would be getting on their high horse! You can't win clearly! You've lost an amazing amount of weight and people will notice even if you turned up in a sack so wear the dress, embrace it and enjoy it! The bride will be much too interested in her day to notice and as you said she'll look beautiful in her wedding dress.

@user1498221998
Good for you deciding to wear the dress, I hope you have a wonderful day celebrating your friends wedding. Well done on your weight loss, awesome achievement

Congrats on losing all that weight. Just wear a simple smart dress...you'll still look great ... but no need for 'stunning, figure hugging' dresses...you'll just look attention seeking and it's a rather mean thing to do on your friend's special day.

I think your post suggests two things. One that you think you look stunning which is pretty arrogant (and probably untrue) and two that you intend to wear it anyway. I have seen this happen with a few friends who have been overweight before and suddenly got slim and they dress to impress all the time and forget what it's like to be the fat girl in the corner. This is your friends wedding day it's her most special moment. Of course dress nice and celebrate your wonderful achievement but if you think for one second it will upset her for the love of god don't do it. Save the amazing dresses for Saturday nights out! Your mum sounds wise, remember what's important and stay classy.

If the dress isn't white, inappropriately figure-hugging and doesn't look anything like a wedding dress it should be OK. If you chose the dress to look and feel good you should wear what you want. Just be honest with yourself - if you think your friend or the other guests would see it as 'upstaging the bride' chose another outfit and wear the dress another time - it is her day and however much you want to show off your weight-loss and new dress, the bride, your friend, is the most important thing for just this one day - you know her best - if there's a chance of anything upsetting her avoid it. Make the day about her.

Is it this one? It's fine. But it looks like a fall dress. So many pretty summer dresses....

www.google.co.uk/search?q=maroon+embroidered+knee+length+dress&rlz=1C9BKJA_enCH597CH597&oq=maroon+embroidered+knee+length+dress&aqs=chrome..69i57.16217j0j7&hl=en-GB&sourceid=chrome-mobile&ie=UTF-8#imgrc=nu7RW0xcYQ5j5M:

As someone who used to be a small 10 and is now a large12 I think the way you describe the dress is probably misleading people. When I was smaller of course I'd wear dresses that were not baggy, not clingy but I guess figure hugging but I didn't think of them that way as I was slim so I just thought of them as dresses that fit against me. Now I'm a bit bigger and have to hide bits I choose dresses with more give and now I get why you'd describe the previous type as figure hugging. But I think they are just normal dresses and you aren't choosing to wear anything inappropriate- it's just that you recognise they are a different style of dress than what you used to wear.

Personally I think the bride probably will feel a bit out out by you looking so stunning (but even a longer slightly less shapely dress would look good on someone slim and toned so regardless of the dress she'd feel this way). I also think lots of people will be praising you and talking about you and she may feel it deflects a little from her. But again - whatever dress you wear that will be the case. (Unless you actually wear a sack so people can't see your body but then they will talk about you anyway!) . I've been 3 months pregnant at weddings and whilst I kept it a secret people worked it out (I usually love a drink!) and I felt that this was unfairly taking attention away from bride. It's similar sort of thing but I think unavoidable.

When you are slim you can't hide that in plain dresses.

The dress sounds perfectly lovely. Maroon good wedding colour. Knee length classy. Cotton good. Sleeves not sleeveless. No sheer panels. All sounds spot on to me.

"I feel I should come back to this thread with a comment but I got bored after the first 4 pages!

Very rude of you OP

Yes don't do a pippa Middleton and be an ass your time will come.

I agree with your mum - well done on your achievement but save the glory for another day!

but I really hate it when they make a big announcement about how they are about to give us a Male Perspective, as if those are so very hard to come by and will change the discussion dramatically, and then proceed to inform us what we want and what we should do as if we are stupid.

But that didn't happen - in no way did I feel stupid by what he said, and if you did, that's your problem.

If blokes were arguing about what suit to wear to a wedding on BodyBuilding forums, I might jump in with "from a female perspective...." and say what my favourite types of suits were. What's wrong with that?

I can't believe you're asking this. Even your question is boasting, and I am certain that you want to show off her. That's not how you treat a friend.

Once you've stayed a size ten for two or three years, then show it off, but please do it in a way that says that you're grateful for having been able to defeat a demon. Please don't boast, otherwise you will have "friends" like yourself monitoring you and turning up in little cocktail dresses just to get you back.

I'm sure you know how to dress respectfully without gloating? Why on earth would you wear a "stunning figure hugging dress" anywhere you didn't expect to be the focus of attention?

As a man, I can assure you that it's the Hollywood people or the wealthy and small-minded of us that are interested in presentation. Yes, we will look twice at someone "stunning", but unless you can hold a conversation for thirty seconds, no one is interested in you. So who are you trying to impress?

Dress as a wedding guest.

It's your friends day, stop being a dick.

You sound very self centred, it is your friends wedding and a special time for her not you. Wear something that you look great in but will not take attention from her. If you cannot see the problem with the dress then I think your friend needs to find better friends

Oh my god borodin Are you a caricature of a twattish man?

On second thoughts- of course you are.

I just am dying to see the dress!! Can you please take a photo or mention the brand? Or pm me a photo? I'm going nuts trying to find it. Hopefully not this one, as it's really a mini dress with sheer cloth to pretend it's not.

www.google.co.uk/search?rlz=1C9BKJA_enCH597CH597&hl=en-GB&biw=768&bih=909&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=of5TWa_iJIjCwALD-6DABA&q=maroon+embroidered+dress&oq=maroon+embroidered+dress&gs_l=mobile-gws-img.12..0.209544.210837.0.213369.11.11.0.0.0.0.260.1699.0j9j1.10.0....0...1.1.64.mobile-gws-img..9.2.459...30i10k1.MToKqrkqU8E#imgrc=U3haeYuzJ96kbM:

Your friend must know about your weight loss so why should you have to dress down. If the dress is appropriate for the occasion why not wear it. You didn't lose your weight to hide the results in case you upset someone else. To be honest if it meant that much to her to lose weight too what happened? Just before anyone decides to have a go, I too am a larger size lady who is trying hard to reduce my weight. Go for it and enjoy yourself.