So, what have we learnt...
That, in addition to all the other rules about women's appearances, there is also the need to dress kindly; what you wear is not just about your choice- it's also about making other people feel or not feel certain thingd about their own body. Yes- if you are slim you are now responsible for other people not being slim.
That if you have lost weight, you must not draw attention to it if there is the slightest possibility that someone will be envious you bitch. 'Drawing attention to it' does not just mean something like discussing it loudly or posting pics online with captions saying "look at me, fatties." No, attention-grabbing behaviour includes selecting a certain dress that may be slightly close fitting than another.
That if you pick a dress and describe it, and make the mistake of mentioning your weight loss at the same time, hundreds of women, despite not knowing how you look in the actual real dress will earnestly tell you that there are other, more suitable dresses for your particular circumstances, and that you are really being a bit of a bitch for wanting to wear the one you chose for yourself out of, you, free choice.
That the most important thing about the wedding day from a female point of view, still is, and perhaps always will be, how slim and pretty all the women are.
That weight loss is a competition.
So, that was really informative - thanks!
Still no one has explained why a similar set of batshit rules don't apply to the men.
In the absence of any real sense of reason, I'd just advise those going to a wedding to ask themselves a few questions before they choose their outfit...
-how much weight have you lost/put on?
- how the hell do you think that will make other people feel?
Hope that helps.