To be angry at dp for booking this holiday?

[Imengagedtoanidiot]

• [Message from MNHQ - just noting, this thread was started in July 2017 and has been resurrected FOR NO GOOD REASON - move along now, please there's nothing new to see here...]

So for ages I've been saying I wan to go to Paris I've never been and it's always been somewhere I want to go but money's right ATM.

Anyway I was talking about how much I want to go in front of my mum a few months and turns out she said to dp to book it for us, she'll have the DCs and pay for the trip for my birthday and keep it as a surprise.

I found out this trip was booked last week by accident and was obviously very excited although felt awful that my mum had given dp the money (£500)

I've just had a look at the details and he's booked it leaving on a Saturday afternoon (arriving late Saturday) and returning very early Monday morning. He booked the Monday off work for me and confirmed mum was having the dcs from Friday night and dropping them to childminder Monday (we collect at 6pm)

AIBU to be fuming that he's taken £500 for essentially 1 day?? I've looked and he could have got Friday evening/early Saturday flights and late Monday flight back for the exact same price so it's not a price issue - he said he just 'didn't think'. He's saying I'm so ungrateful and should be thankful for him (he didn't bloody pay for it)

I'm really upset and don't know if I am being ungrateful and a spoilt brat but I'm just pissed off and feel like my dream break and first holiday without dc is a fucking joke.

I've tried changing the flights and even cancelling but the charge is excessive.

And this really is one of those threads that allows people to take the moral high ground and post comments like "you sound delightful" when there is absolutely no call for it.

Also someone upthread said Paris closes on a Sunday. This is sort of true. OP you will need to plan carefully where you go and what you eat because lots of restaurants and many, many shops are closed on Sundays. All the big department stores are closed, for example and lots of small shops will definitely be closed.

Same number of nights in the hotel, but three whole days in Paris.

EXACTLY!

Had the OP's DP done this, OP would be over the moon.

I don't get why you wouldn't maximise on the most time possible, for the same price.

In fact, 1 night would have done if he found it hard for under £500. Early saturday morning flight, sat night hotel, leave late sunday night.

Cheaper, and 2 full days, and money for spending!

2nd night is pointless really, when having to leave very early Monday morning.

I'd be really upset too. He's put no thought in at all. It's not ungrateful to notice that someone has wildly wasted money when you could have got so much more time there for the same amount.

He is crap and disengaged.
The pearl clutchers upthread are batshit.

Women are now supposed to be so fucking compliant, they need to be delight d when their DP borrows money, books the wrong flights and does not even réalisé his mistake.

Id see if you could change the tickets times

2nd night is pointless really, when having to leave very early Monday morning.

Surely even if you'd be leaving early Monday morning, that leaves an evening in Paris for a nice romantic meal out, unless I'm missing something...

If I was him and your mum I definitely wouldn't bother next time and you'd be getting a bunch of wilted flowers from the reduced section of the local petrol station on their way home as your present

And she should be suitably grateful for that thought, and say thank you, because, you know...manners

Thought that counts and all.

Women are now supposed to be so fucking compliant, they need to be delight d when their DP borrows money, books the wrong flights and does not even réalisé his mistake.

FFS. WTAF are you on about?! Right, go book a weekend for your dp, flights/ hotel etc and if he calls you a fucking idiot, you haven't done it right, I assume your attitude will be the same.

Surely even if you'd be leaving early Monday morning, that leaves an evening in Paris for a nice romantic meal out, unless I'm missing something... confused

It depends how early early is. If the flight's at 7 they might need to leave the hotel at 4.30 or 5, which is going to put quite a dampener on the nice romantic night

And she should be suitably grateful for that thought, and say thank you, because, you know...manners hmm
Thought that counts and all.

Yes, of course she should! Because you're right, the thought of a present does count and I'd say thank you to flowers too.
Can you not see that?
As I'm assuming by your little humphy face icon though you'd be disgusted at the thought that it wasn't anything more expensive.
Which is why I meant I'd just get flowers - as it's not worth spending too much on such ungratefulness.

Tequila

Anyone can make a mistake. I myself once booked flights for completely the wrong day by not paying attention on the website.

But afterwards I was pissed off with myself and mortified.

The OP's DH just cannot be arsed.

Big difference.

If I was the OP I would not be incandescent with rage but I would be pretty pissed of.

All those "outraged" posters - the OP's husband didn't put any thought in though, that's the point! It was not his idea nor his money. He was GIVEN £500 and TOLD to book a trip to Paris by his MIL, who agreed to look after the children from Friday until Monday, surely implying she intended him to take his wife to Paris from Friday until Monday. What is so difficult to understand!

Yes it's probably a little unreasonable to call him a prick etc. But the OP is well within her rights to be irritated. As I demonstrated on a post above, it took me under 5 minutes on a flight and hotel comparison website to find a better deal. She should be pissed.

Tequila - it was the fact you wanted to buy a bunch of wilted flowers.

Cost is irrelevant. But here's another humpy icon

So the gift was from your mum but your dp was thoughtless and made it much worse than it could have been simply out of laziness. Partly ruining the surprise your mum wanted for you both.
Yanbu. He was lazy.

I've just had a look at the details and he's booked it leaving on a Saturday afternoon (arriving late Saturday) and returning very early Monday morning. He booked the Monday off work for me and confirmed mum was having the dcs from Friday night and dropping them to childminder Monday (we collect at 6pm)

So you wanted a trip to Paris. Money's tight at the moment. Two people close to you have arranged for you to have one as a surprise. You've got childcare sorted for Friday night, so maybe out for a meal/drinks in the pub or whatever?
Childfree lie in Saturday morning, arrive in Paris around teatime so you can have meal/wander along the Seine/see the Eiffel Tower/insert choice of activity here.
Back to hotel, wake up in Paris, have a full day together seeing the sites you didn't see yesterday, meal/drinks then back to hotel in the evening.
Not leaving until Monday, day off work all taken care of.
Maybe it's just me, but I'm really struggling to see why anyone's first reaction to that would be to be angry and cry it's thoughtless, not long enough, etc etc.
I tell you what, I certainly wouldn't bother next time she asked for a trip away! Or any of the others who agree it's not good enough and thoughtless.

Haven't read whole thread
But yes, op, your fiancé has shown zero common sense
It makes the whole thing a bit crap and it only takes one delay and you've lost a bunch of time.

.....And all he had to do was book the bloody flights. FGS . Sorry but I'd want to throttle him.

Mum ^ has stumped up the money. And looking after the kids. And came up with the idea in the first place I bet. She'll be pissed off when she realises what a bollocks he's made of it.^

What a bloody muppet.

He threw himself into that didn't he.

Tequila are you the idiot fiancè? You seem disturbingly heated about the topic.

It would never cross my mind to be annoyed by this situation ever
If I was, I would keep it yo myself

I think this relationship is doomed

Tequila are you the idiot fiancè? You seem disturbingly heated about the topic.

I can guarantee you I'm not
If there's one thing that does get me heated though it's grabbiness! Can't abide it.
Why get accused of being the "idiot" fiance just because I call people out on being entitled? It's a horrible trait to have, and telling that the first response to my last post is not what I've actually said, but to say I must be the idiot who booked it.

So why would anyone's response to this be "it's not enough, idiot?"
As I'm struggling.
So you wanted a trip to Paris. Money's tight at the moment. Two people close to you have arranged for you to have one as a surprise. You've got childcare sorted for Friday night, so maybe out for a meal/drinks in the pub or whatever?Childfree lie in Saturday morning, arrive in Paris around teatime so you can have meal/wander along the Seine/see the Eiffel Tower/insert choice of activity here.
Back to hotel, wake up in Paris, have a full day together seeing the sites you didn't see yesterday, meal/drinks then back to hotel in the evening.Not leaving until Monday, day off work all taken care of.
Maybe it's just me, but I'm really struggling to see why anyone's first reaction to that would be to be angry and cry it's thoughtless, not long enough, etc etc.I tell you what, I certainly wouldn't bother next time she asked for a trip away! Or any of the others who agree it's not good enough and thoughtless.