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AIBU?

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Original poster

to ask if you would get rid of your dog if they growled at your child?

181 replies

Busybecca · 20/06/2017 22:25

I have a 7 year old large breed dog. Today I took her for a run/bike ride before collecting the DCs from school/nursery and heading to the park for them all to cool off in the river. When we arrived home, I asked DH to watch them while I took a quick shower. Ddog was sleeping and drying off in the sunshine when I went upstairs.

I heard shouting when I was in the shower and when I got out I found DH had locked Ddog in the utility room. He said she had growled at DD (3) and we need to get rid of her. I asked what had happened and he said it didn't matter, she's agressive and should go. After speaking to the DCs I discovered that they had been running and doing cartwheels and DD had accidentally kicked Ddog when landing. She said she stroked her and said sorry and Ddog licked her. She also mentioned that DH had been inside the house so hadn't been supervising them like I'd asked.

Ddog adores the DC and has never shown any aggression towards humans or dogs. I think a growl was a natural reaction to being woken and hurt and doesn't mean she had bad intentions but DH thinks I'm putting Ddog before the DC. I said he was putting himself before the DC when he wasn't supervising them appropriately...!

Am I being naive? Would you get rid of your dog if they growled at your child?

OP posts:
missiondecision · 20/06/2017 22:27

Only you can answer this.

Grimbles · 20/06/2017 22:28

Not for growling, no. Especially in the circs you described.

WorraLiberty · 20/06/2017 22:29

No, in those circumstances I absolutely wouldn't.

How else does your 'D'H think the dog was going to communicate?

Was it supposed to jump up and say, "Careful now kids, that hurt"? or "Oh come on now kids, it's too hot for this shit"?

It sounds as though he's looking for an excuse to get rid Sad

Pengggwn · 20/06/2017 22:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Babyroobs · 20/06/2017 22:29

My dog often growls at my kids- usually when she is tired and just wants to be left alone to sleep. It's their warning system.

newdaylight · 20/06/2017 22:30

Personally no.

Xmasbaby11 · 20/06/2017 22:32

You know your dog best and it doesn't sound like he's a problem. The 3 year old needs close supervision, though. If your DH is seriously worried about the dog being aggressive, he needs to be more attentive. Presumably he wasn't before this incident?

Pinkheart5912 · 20/06/2017 22:32

The dog was kicked, I know you say dd did this accidentally but I think growling was a natural reaction.

If you sitting minding your own business and was kicked don't you think you'd make some kind of noise?

If your dh was bothering to supervise his dc like you asked your dd might not of been doing cart wheels near the dog accidentally kicking it!

No I would absolutely not get rid of my dog for growling when kicked. Nobody gets rid of a dog for growling when kicked

WhooooAmI24601 · 20/06/2017 22:32

Nope, not in thoe circumstances; your dog was sending a signal to your DD that she'd been hurt. If she'd bitten or gone for your DD I'd change my stance but no, not for a simple growl.

We have two DS' and our spaniel (who is generally quite lovely) has growled at them very occasionally to warn them she's not keen on what they're doing. She also leaves the room to get away and is very good at walking way when she's had enough, but I don't see that it's a terrible thing unless my DCs don't learn from her growls. Dogs communicate with sounds rather than words. Teach your DCs to listen and watch and to be more careful cartwheeling.

Alittlepotofrosie · 20/06/2017 22:33

Wouldn't get rid of the dog, no. But i would do a better job of training the kids to respect the dog and not play rough games around her.

WhyHasAllTheRumGone · 20/06/2017 22:33

Growling is Ddog's way of saying, ouch! Enough! We all need to say that sometimes. As an isolated incident that your describe I wouldn't blame the dog and make sure DC was always adequately supervised in the future.

MudCity · 20/06/2017 22:33

Absolutely not! Dogs will naturally growl or yelp if someone unexpectedly hurts them. It's their way of saying "Oi, that hurt" or "Get off". She was having a snooze. That's why the proverb says let sleeping dogs lie!

Unimpressed by your DH's reaction Angry

StarryCorpulentCunt · 20/06/2017 22:33

No of course not. It's the ones who don't I would worry more about. Growling is basically the dog telling you to stop what you are doing/fuck off. A dog who is punished for growling is essentially being taught not to communicate with you. What you then end up with is a dog who will give no warning when they are reaching their limit and will simply snap. Far more dangerous imo than a dog who growls in warning. At least with growling you KNOW you are annoying or scaring them and should get out of their face.

Smeaton · 20/06/2017 22:34

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Fedupoftheheat · 20/06/2017 22:34

My dog has growled at mine. It's only ever happened when they tried to grab him for a hug. He doesn't like it, I'm teaching them not to do it. It does worry me but I watch them like a hawk and they are never left alone.
The first time it ever happened was when I had him at the vets , a child came up and grabbed him and cuddled him and he growled. The child was about 7. I don't blame my dog for that - he was already stressed, but now he doesn't like to be grabbed like that al all.
Otherwise he's the softest mutt ever.

Calyrical · 20/06/2017 22:34

No

GissASquizz · 20/06/2017 22:34

No. I'd give the adult who should have been supervising a bollocking though.

Samoyedydog · 20/06/2017 22:35

Well I definitely wouldn't get rid of a dog for that. Your DD just startled the dog it doesn't sound like the dog was being aggressive. My dog does this all the time as she sleeps under our feet by the sofa and if one of us gets up and startles her whilst she's asleep she will do a little growl but it's more like a moan iyswim, then she just gets up and acts normal. But obviously I'm no expert and only going on experience of my own dog who I know.

NormaSmuff · 20/06/2017 22:35

Nope, a growl us a warning, dog needs her own space

honeyroar · 20/06/2017 22:35

Not in the described circumstances, no, I wouldn't.

GinSwigmore · 20/06/2017 22:35

No. But I wouldn't leave the three year old with Ddog unsupervised (for the dog as much as DD) and I would remind all the kids about respecting spaces.
Oh and to put it in perspective, my kids have been growled at by strangers' dogs (which hadn't been kicked) and I have never suggested the dogs were dangerous. Have always told my kids they were at fault for being too close/dogs scared of scooters etc. Growling after being kicked is not the same as snarling/baring teeth or nipping.

lazydog · 20/06/2017 22:36

Absolutely not, no. A growl is a warning that the dog was uncomfortable, hurt or feeling threatened. A growl is not an aggressive act. A dog prone to snapping without warning (which usually happens when people tell their dogs off for growling - such utterly stupid logic!!) would be very concerning here, and far harder to manage, but not this totally normal behaviour. Your DH is at fault here for leaving a 3 year old unsupervised with the dog (any dog!)

minsmum · 20/06/2017 22:36

Growling is a dog's way of letting you know they are unhappy with something. It is better that the dog communicates like this than going straight away to a bite. It is not safe for your children or the dog for them to be left together on their own.
Your Dh was in the wrong for not supervising it was a hot day the dog was probably hot and uncomfortable and got kicked it sounds remarkably good natured to me.

Original poster
Busybecca · 20/06/2017 22:38

She has so far been awesome with the DC. If they're boisterous she'll stick with me without me asking her to and she's always rounding them up when we're walking and so pleased to see them when we arrive home. DH thinks because she's a large breed she could kill them and it isn't worth the risk but I don't think it is a risk at all, particularly if they are supervised properly which he fails to admit he was wrong not to do Angry

OP posts:
NicolasFlamel · 20/06/2017 22:39

Wouldn't you cry out or shout if someone kicked you? My dog has growled at my kids a couple of times. They've had to learn the boundaries and how to behave properly with her.
It's the dogs way of communicating, it's not like they can just talk to you. Getting rid of the dog would be really OTT.