Am I being a terrible snob?

[GirlOnATrainToShite]

SMIL and FIL coming to stay for week soon which is an annual event. They are in all lovely and no trouble apart from the fact they watch every single soap going .

I admit I am not great with guests and I struggle having people in my space for long periods. We are also a large blended family so the house will be full (not relevant).

SMIL is a lovely northern lady who lives in an area where everyone is in and out of each other's houses, everyone knows that each other and it's a small area we live down south in a big area and very much keep to ourselves - we know most of our neighbours and are friendly but that's about it. I hate people turning up "unannounced".

We have no front garden (Victorian semi) just a very narrow path at the front of the house and a low wall dividing it from the pavement.

We do however have a (small) back garden which gets plenty of sun.

SMIL insists on taking a dining room chair and sitting on the front "path" and resting her legs on the wall with the front door wide open saying hello to anyone who walks past.

I know there are bigger things going on right now but AIBU to really hate her doing this as it's seems a bit "common" and prefer her to use the back which is private? I know she's not hurting anyone but I hate having my front door wide open (I will be at work some of the time). I need to chill out don't I?

[Lisarose1]

I would ask your husband to have a word with your mil discreetly,
It is unacceptable and it is unsophisticated and it's your house and your street.
I wouldn't tolerate this from any member of my family
My house my rules
They are a guest
Respect the wishes of the host

[Carriecakes80]

I do this all the time! And our home can be seen from Chequers! They've not said owt yet! ;-)

YABU! Live and let live! I'd go and join her!

[LML83]

Thanks I will remember that in future.

Written Written written

I must look like such an idiot. I am mortified.

[ilovesooty]

There's some nasty snippy stuff on this thread.

I'm also inclined to think they probably had a lot more fun in the 50s and 60s and communities looked after one another.

[ilovesooty]

unsophisticated

[Lovingit81]

I'm originally from down south but have lived up north for over ten years now and this is not a south or north thing. It's a cultural thing. Some do it some don't, maybe she's equally embarrassed of your boring suburban ways. YABVU. Get a life.

[nina2b]

Today 20:55 GirlOnATrainToShite

If you had wrote

Written - if I had written

More correctly: "If you had written..."
(However, it is bad form to correct someone's SP&G.)

[howrudeforme]

My ex mil (from overseas) came over to stay for months and tried to take over the home.

She put washing out in front bloody garden and it's ended up on google maps street view!

[GirlOnATrainToShite]

nina2b

I wouldn't normally correct someone's grammar - but seeing as she was rewriting my thread for me I thought it was fair game.

[nina2b]

Okay. Fair enough.

[falange]

I think that perhaps OP hasn't had the reaction she wanted about her obviously lighthearted and tongue in cheek post and is now getting cross with people.
P.s Unsophisticated. Lol.

[southeastdweller]

I think most people posting, particularly in the last few pages, haven't bothered to read all of the OP's posts.

[smallchanceofrain]

Yes you are.

Clearly you married beneath you. LTB and find one with less common relatives.

[Rach5l]

Ok well then prevent her doing it somehow. Put a nice bench out if room? Put something blocking her view would tubs of plants help? Tell her there's an axe murderer living next door? wax on about pollution from sitting out front. Idk sure you can think of something

[LML83]

I was highlighting the reasons I think it is ok to ask your MIL not to sit at the front. I think your reasons are unreasonable but not what you are asking her to do.
For you to bother to only comment on an error and none of the content is rude.

[SukiTheDog]

BeezieKn I was being a little tongue-in-cheek with my polite society comment.

These threads always degenerate into a bun fight, don't they?

[DoryDingDong]

at the northern reference
I'm up north and no one I have ever known actually does this sitting out thing 😂
I'd say she's just a bit batty

[chipscheeseandgravy]

There's a guy near me that does something similar. He sits on his mobility scooter on his front path drinking a can of super strength with the radio on. (Yes we're up north)
Smiling at people and saying hello isn't going to put you in a bad light with the neighbours. Just let her get on with it.

[margesimpson40]

be happy she feels comfortable doing this and be happy I'm not visiting with my chav summer wardrobe, knock off fags ... oh and my copy of The Sunday Times. I like to mix it up a bit :) Still trying to get over the shock in the local pub, when me and my equally don't give a toss cousin, trounced the so called intellectuals at the pub quiz :)

[FeralBeryl]

Oh OP and what a battering!
Gone are the days of a bit of tongue in cheekedness. I'm Northern and depending on the cut of my jib, either very posh, or most rough.
I have lived in both 'sit out the front' and 'non sit out the front' areas.
My DM would feel it quite common as would her mum who also thinks leaving your pegs on the line overnight is common whereas I couldn't give a shite either way as long as it isn't impacting on the neighbours. They had fuck all growing up and I think it is a bit keeping up appearances in their case.
DF loved chatting to passers by when he was out the front, but he stood up which meant he was safe from DM's wrath.

The dining chair aspect is wrong though.

I love having a quick chat to my neighbour over my front bush (!) but she turns into Alf Garnett after a while so I make my excuses and go in after politely disagreeing.

I'm becoming especially tempted to sit out next time MIL visits as it would horrify her.
She's Southern though intolerant bunch.

[GirlOnATrainToShite]

My DM would feel it quite common as would her mum who also thinks leaving your pegs on the line overnight is common whereas I couldn't give a shite either way as long as it isn't impacting on the neighbours. They had fuck all growing up and I think it is a bit keeping up appearances in their case

Yes to this - my dad also and he was illegitimate born in the 1930s (had fuck all but "did good") but his mum kept him - so was always instilled in him and then us we had to be whiter than the whitest.

[howrudeforme]

My ex mil (from overseas) came over to stay for months and tried to take over the home.

She put washing out in front bloody garden and it's ended up on google maps street view!

[mydietstartsmonday]

Let and let live. Get her a nice garden chair and put it out for her. Do you have a table she can out her tea on, or can she use the wall. Get her a little picnic and special cup and embrace the diversity of life.

[Maireadplastic]

I don't really understand the chair side of things. I think a lovely dark wood antique chair would look rather nice out there.

[Maireadplastic]

Or a classic Ercol