AIBU? Sister named/naming her children the same as mine...

[McCormick1988]

I have 2 sons: Hayden and Oliver.

DSis had a daughter after I had Hayden and named her Hayden I didn't care too much as she was a girl and mine was a boy. It also didn't matter that much.

My Oliver is 2 months and she is the 3rd trimester of her pregnancy and has announced he's an Oliver.

Different middle names but still!

AIBU to think this is a bit unfair?

Yeah, your sister is weird.

Weird, passive aggressive and bonkers. There are millions of names out there.

very odd. | would be annoyed.

Oh my days, that's strange.

It's batshit. Everyone who knows both of you will think it's batshit.

Come back in 20 years and let us know how the kids feel about it. Atleast they wont have the same surnames.

@TaliZorahVasNormandy how do you know they don't...?

Oh OP if you have a third lie about the name until she has her third.

Of course I told her I think it was a terrible idea and that's when she declared that it has always been her favourite name 🙄

Sucks if they do OP.

Ds1 shares a middle name with his older cousin. We liked a name very similar to the cousin's first name as well (think Alex/Alec) but didn't use it - for obvious reasons. I think you sister/her dh are actig bizarrely.

Tell her you have decided against Oliver and gone for Cockwomble Moist Flange the third. When she says that is ridiculous say I know, who would copy that.

My brother wanted to use same name as my ds, I said fine.

But your situation with 2 kids the same. She's just being weird. But I'd let it go if no other probs with her.

I would just point out that the kids won't thank her for it and everyone will think she's an utter fruitcake who has real issues with her sister

Copying one name is grounds for "nobody owns a name" and something you just have to put up with. It could be that you really did take the one name she loved above all others and she thought sod it I'm using it anyway.

Copying both children's names is just bizarre. There's thousands of lovely names out there.

No sorry that is one of the strangest things I've heard for a long time. I would have to speak to my sister and make it clear I think she's being bizarre! She's one raisin shy of a fruitcake OP - if you have a good relationship with her imo would speak to her.

Like everyone seems to have said. That's mad.

I did wonder if the names were traditional family names "There's been an Oliver in our family for 800 years" sort of thing. If so, and you used both of them that might be cause for discussion.

But, of course, I don't believe that to be true (who has Hayden as a family name that can't be let go of). Just trying to understand the madness.

That's really quite odd. Especially if the Olivers end up in the same class at school.

They might have been her favourite names but it's ridiculous calling cousins identical names. Tell her you don't want the children embarrassed by this. People will think you a odd cult or something.

This is weird.

It as weird as my sister who named all her pets after my 4 dc. At least yours is flattery

Your parents must be confused

I still remember being at the park with a grandmother who was with her DGD Layla, Leila and Leah - who were cousins. It was years ago and she (and they) were confused and who she was referring to. She rolled her eyes when attempting to explain it to me

Really weird. Of all the names she has to copy both ?! I would be fuming.

No, this is really strange.

Say I called DD Linda and then my (imaginary) sister called her kid Linda, I'd not only think it was weird, I'd be annoyed.

And then say I had another child, a son called Jamie and she had a daughter called Jamie, I'd be really annoyed. Why does she have to have the same name? I love my DD's name (it isn't Linda or Jamie btw) but if I had a sister and she called her child that, I'd pick a different one (unless we were pregnant at the same time and I announced the name and THEN she picked it- then I'd tell her to pick a new one).

There are millions of names, why does she have to have even one the same, let alone two? I'd be furious, and I think it's really weird that she can't pick a different name, especially twice!

Does your sister have genuine mental health issues, or has shown this sort of 'copycat' behaviour throughout her life? Had she ever mentioned that Oliver was her 'absolute favourite name' anytime before this? Because this isn't normal or healthy.

It's absolutely one thing to have a couple of cousins share either a historical (family related) or popular (such as Oliver) first name. However this is very much beyond that, there's a very good reason most people think this is bizarre.

If it were my sister, I'd be having a nice-but- firm talk with her about how odd you find her copying your children's names, and whilst she's obviously entitled to call her children whatever she pleases, you can't fathom why she'd not want to give them some individuality from their cousins. I'd also ask if there was anything else she'd like to talk about any jealousy issues to work out.