MIL Surprise, surprise

[AmberStClare]

DP is away from home on a course and have been enjoying this week on my own, slobbing out in the evening after work, eating supper in front of the TV and generally having a nice time.

Just got home from work and opened the front door, walked into the sitting room to find my MIL sitting on the sofa. Cries 'surprise surprise, got the key from your NDN, let myself in and have come to stay for a few days to keep you company whilst DP is away.'

Just rung DP and he is equally annoyed as is expected back Saturday and we were looking forward to the weekend catching up on each other's news and bit of frottage. All out of the window as MIL expects to be waited on hand and foot, in fact just said if I was putting the kettle on she would love a cup of tea, 'And a biscuit dear if there are any going.'

Who do I kill first, NDN for giving out the key without checking with me first (She has never met MIL before as we moved here recently) or MIL for presuming she can do this.

yes tell him to hurry up

Problem is, she's never going to forgive you for this and will work on manipulating your other half against you slowly for years and years to come. Won't come to your wedding etc. I know what these women are like. I lost the father of my child to one! She wore him down over 2 years and he left as he was so sick of it! Loads more to it but that's part of it for sure

Even though it's not your fault of course!

I have just finished the whole thread and think you handled this brilliantly OP, let's hope MIL will now ring in future before she decides to descends on you again.

Once she'd declared the lunch delicious, you should have told her that you were only joking when you said your husband made it, actually it was you.

I hope he hasn't paid her b&b bill as I imagine that would be an incentive for her to visit again...

Yes Kitten & I was musing on the popping in for a brew (with the possibility people would be out or busy) rather than thinking it was okay to come to stay. Though I have had that with someone in a crisis & of course I took them in - for a few weeks.

That does happen with offspring though eg turning up from uni or travelling unannounced sometimes with friends but I think people take that more in their stride. I did.

I don't think N&W bullys people as such, but I have noticed her on MIL threads where she is very pro MIL.

Makes me think she probably is one and everything she says is to be taken with a pinch of salt as she shows bias. No big deal, when you recognise her you know that.

Hope you're enjoying drinking your wine, OP, you definitely deserve it.

Oh I must know what she said !

Come on OP, you're killing us.

I need to be up at 5.30 but I can't go to bed until you update!

I have keys to both of my son's houses,as they have to ours ( this will always be their home, daughter-in-law has one to. ) but only use them if I am doing a job/favour for them. I also only visit if invited, even though I'm constantly told to go to theirs when ever I want to. I would never just plonk myself into their homes. Even daughter-in-law told us to come over when ever we want to.

I can't quite get past your having to go out for a walk because she said she needed a little chat with The Chosen One. I like walks, but I don't like being edged out!

I've always found Navy to be a reasonable and consider poster unlike some who are on this thread.

Really want to know what she said so place marking.

I never thought of Navy as a bully.

She is usually quite considerate in her posts, only biased on MIL threads, but knowing her, it's expected. We just carry on reading.

Another one sticking up for Navy - she's not a bully.

Update please!! This is a great thread. The MIL is so off the charts, and Amber so cool with dealing with her. I just hope the Chosen One has told her off and can get her to be a little more respectful of the future DIL, possible mother of dear grandchildren....

I've been following for a few days, I'm impressed by your gumption! I do imagine it's tricky for your partner, but I hope he starts to stick up for you and tell his mother she's batshit. Though maybe not in those words.

I also don't think Navy is a bully, she just speaks her mind and doesn't worry about sticking to her guns. And that is her right!

Omg! I've been lurking tonight and read this whole thread. I had to register just to say you're my hero! I love that you didn't back down and I can't wait to hear what happens next!

I gave my tuppence worth from an experience perspective a couple of days ago but I fully respect OP's views on 'something to discuss' and her taking off.

With regard to the discussions between other posters? I think that one got the wrong end thinking it was a mostly MIL bashing thread - tbh to me it's more about someone quite happily being given access to the house.

The MIL thing doesn't surprise me at all given my own experience.

I am predicting the lack of response from OP is cos she's driving to the B&B to flatten her MIL

Either that or she's so shocked she can't put the update into words

Or has got pissed