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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Elmlea Husband strikes again!

335 replies

ElinorRigby · 10/06/2017 11:30

I posted a few days back about my husband, who was given a shopping list with 'cream' and 'orange juice cartons' on it. He returned with a) Elmlea and b) cartons of orange squash - despite the fact that both of us always have real cream and pure fruit juices.

We had a conversation in which I said if the shop did not stock the products on the list, it was better to return empty-handed.

I asked him to take the squash back and he did so, telling me he'd now go some apple juice in exchange. (In fact he had got multivitamin fruit and carrot juice.)

Yesterday the handle of our smaller bucket snapped. We have one heavy duty bucket - the kind used for outdoor jobs - and the smaller bucket that I use for soaking and handwashing. I said 'Could you get me a small 8 litre bucket while you're out.'

He returned saying he had had to look everywhere in order to find a small bucket. He then showed me quite a large bucket with a label on the side saying '13 litre capacity.'

I said, 'This is too big.'
He said, There weren't any small ones. I went to lots of shops.'
I said, 'Did you get a receipt'
He said, 'No.'

I took the 13 litre bucket back intending to ask for a refund and then order one of the right size from Asda Click and Collect. But the woman at the shop said, 'We do have smaller buckets'. So, because she was being helpful, I got a 7 litre one from the display at the front of the shop.

Is this a '3 strikes and he's out' situation?

OP posts:
TheBadgersMadeMeDoIt · 10/06/2017 19:57

My DH is pretty hopeless at shopping too. He can usually follow a list but if the thing I want doesn't immediately jump off the shelf into his hand he tends to try and "source an alternative"...and I really wish he wouldn't.

When I was making DD's birthday cake I send him out for the sugar paste. He couldn't find it (because in the shop it was labelled as "rolling icing"). So he came back with marzipan instead. FFS.

Another time I sent him to buy a jogging suit for DD's PE kit. I told him specifically that she won't wear anything "boyish". He came back with a navy blue Umbro shell suit.

So I sympathise. (Although I didn't send him back to the shops. He'd only sulk and refuse to go shopping for me again, anyway.)

Tazerface · 10/06/2017 20:23

You sound like hard work, controlling and bordering on emotionally abusive.

Good one Grin

Reminds me when I asked DH to stop peppering the roast potatoes because I didn't like it. He must have done it every single time for the next ten times of doing it. Whereas when he asked me to stop using dried thyme on the spuds I stopped. Immediately. Confused

Obviously I taxed his poor little man-brain too much!

Lalalax3 · 10/06/2017 20:44

Bloody hell OP, in the time it took you to type all that you could've popped to the shop yourself!

StillHungryy · 10/06/2017 22:50

I honestly think these posts attract posters who post the one or few times their partners have fucked up people take it literally all the time and you get posters doing the poor menz shit who can't do basic stuff ( when every1 fucks up occasionally), which is sad because there's always loads of great fuck ups

Gwenhwyfar · 11/06/2017 12:07

"I'd also expect someone to be pretty grumpy with me if I forgot something"

I don't expect my boss to be grumpy with me if I forget something at work! I'm glad I'm single, your making living with someone sound like a really stressful job worse than any paid job I've had.

TomHardysWhore · 11/06/2017 12:28

LOL @ LTB 😂

JasmineBuckles · 11/06/2017 12:38

My DP is out shopping right now. He doesn't do the shopping normally, he works away a lot and if he's home I normally shop on my way home from work depending on what I feel like cooking for dinner.

He's got a list in order of how the shop is laid out, because it's not a job he normally does. It makes life easier for him.

If he cocks up and forgets something, or gets the wrong thing, I won't really care. He won't have done it on purpose, or because he's stupid. He just rarely goes into a shop, and I do all the cooking.

He's offered to go, I'm still in my pajamas on the sofa with the dog, I give zero fucks if he cocks it up, he's gone off all pleased with himself that he's doing his bit after being away with work all week.

He's also put some washing on this weekend and greyed some white t shirts. I'm not going to moan, same as he didn't moan when I shrunk his cashmere jumpers on two occasions.

If you like and respect someone, you don't pick at the unimportant stuff.

CheeseQueen · 11/06/2017 13:18

I feel slightly sorry for him and can't believe you made him take the squash back

This. I'd be like " go your soddin' self then if you're so picky!" Grin

CheeseQueen · 11/06/2017 13:23

How do people not know that Elmlea is not cream!!!!???

I didn't until about 2 minutes ago when I read all the outraged comments on here. As I never eat the stuff, we don't buy it but if somebody askked me to go to the shops and get them some cream I'd probably have made the same mistake and picked it up too.
What is it if it's not cream then? A t bone steak?! Confused

Janeinthemiddle · 11/06/2017 13:29

Oh my lord! I thought Elmlea is cream! I'm a complete fucking nutter!!!

MiladyThesaurus · 11/06/2017 13:49

"I'd also expect someone to be pretty grumpy with me if I forgot something"

I don't expect my boss to be grumpy with me if I forget something at work!

And, of course, there's the simple fact that you are not your partner's boss.

user1471439727 · 11/06/2017 13:57

Elmlea isn't cream?!

What on earth is it?

VladmirsPoutine · 11/06/2017 13:59

I would honestly advise him to divorce you and never look back.

WhatALoadOfOldBollocks · 11/06/2017 14:26

At least he is trying
Oh bless him, that's OK then. Oh, hang on, he's a grown man not a child and should be capable of following intructions Hmm

The shop did stock buckets though, just not in the exact size the OP asked for. So he went for the option that could hold 8 litres.
The shop did stock the smaller buckets. When OP went in and asked the assistant. Why didn't he ask the assistant?

Here's a novel idea, why don't you go yourself
OK, so he messes the shopping up so OP does it. What about if he messes up the hoovering/cleaning the bathroom/doing the laundry/bringing up the kids? Do they become jobs she should just do too? What about if he doesn't follow instructions at work? Do his colleagues have to do those tasks from then on? Confused

I feel sorry for him. Do your own shopping OP.
This was shopping for the family. Just because it was domestic stuff doesn't make it her shopping! Hmm

Yes, OP, time for you to take over your female job of shopping, because 'poor bloke' just isn't capable. Who made you capable? Did you go to uni to learn how to read labels? I know in my case my ovaries came with this programmed into them.
LOL @ expatinscotland, so did mine Grin. Aren't us women amazing that we can, you know, read labels and ask shop assistants for help when we can't find something on a list.

DonaldStott · 11/06/2017 14:32

Fucking hell. I would dread to think what you're like when you're having a shag!!!

Hotpinkangel19 · 11/06/2017 14:37

I always thought Elmlea was cream!!!!! 🙈

OutComeTheWolves · 11/06/2017 14:39

I had no idea that elmlea isn't cream!

Secretsweets · 11/06/2017 14:40

Donaldstott Grin love that

OP You sound like a bloody nightmare - if I was him I'd have told you to go yourself ! You must be fucking perfect !!!

iffikitty · 11/06/2017 14:45

Any woman who can paint a skirting board would be an excellent shag.

TinklyLittleLaugh · 11/06/2017 15:10

See I wouldn't put up with slapdash, half hearted, meh it'll do, shagging either. Obviously some people have lower standards.

TinklyLittleLaugh · 11/06/2017 15:12

And those of you who think Elle's is cream; have you never tasted cream then? It is nothing like cream, it is horrid.

andpeggy29 · 11/06/2017 15:34

So if it's not cream, wtf is Elmlea????? ConfusedConfusedConfusedConfusedConfusedConfused

Huldra · 11/06/2017 15:42

I've never had Elmlea, always thought it was a brand of cream, so I may have picked some up by accident.

Juice thing is a bit silly of him, if you don't ever have squash at home why would he think you would start wanting several bottles.

Who wants to be trawling shops trying to by the exact sized bucket that you deem as right.

araiwa · 11/06/2017 16:05

it strikes me that OP also failed to return home with an 8L bucket. maybe DH should send her back out

It also strikes me that OP is not aware that she doesnt have to fill a 13L bucket to the brim, she could, in fact, put 8L of water in it and it would weigh the same as a full 8L bucket

KeiraKnightleyActsWithHerTeeth · 11/06/2017 16:08

Tinkly I had no idea it wasn't cream. Equally I've never considered buying it nor have I tasted it because I thought it was just branded cream so have always passed it by because why would you buy branded cream? It would be like buying branded bananas.

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