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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU or does this look like my husband has contacted an escort for sex??

406 replies

FeellikeLTB · 09/06/2017 20:23

Sorry for rambling but I'm shaking and fuming right now.

Hubby came home today from working abroad and I've just seen this screenshot in his IPad gallery. (Not snooping, daughter and I were scrolling through pics on there from when we last visited)
We are at his mothers for the night and it's the first time he's seen her in 10 months so I don't want to make a scene.
I have confronted him and at first he looked confused like I was showing him a picture of a fucking dog with 3 heads and said "I don't know" Hmm then he said "it's a long story". I told him I didn't want to hear it and I wanted him to drive us home after we'd eaten and he could stay at his mums.
He's now gone upstairs in his old bedroom because he's tired from the flight, bless him Angry And I'm sat downstairs with his mum and sister who hardly speak English entertaining our 6 year old daughter.
I want to smother him with a pillow but I'm not insured to drive the car.
So AIBU to think this is him looking for a shag while he's working away?
And what should I do?

AIBU or does this look like my husband has contacted an escort for sex??
OP posts:
Georgeofthejungle · 09/06/2017 23:01

Also - not that long a story that he couldn't have just told you straight away.

P.S. All this is making me see what a mug I was for believing my ex in a similar situ. Thank Christ I'm shot of him!

TigerApplique · 09/06/2017 23:02

FeellikeLTB Him swearing on DDs life would be enough for me to believe him, and from him being from a religious background as well.

PopcornBits · 09/06/2017 23:03

No he went to bed because he fucking panicked, and knew you had him by the balls.
He's had so much time to come up with a bullshit story, and you're listening to him, stop listening to him!

PopcornBits · 09/06/2017 23:05

Ah yes religious because he is that in keeping with his culture he allows his friend to contact a prostitute on HIS iPad. Don't make me laugh!

LiquidCosh · 09/06/2017 23:05

Oh OP what a croc of horse shit that story is. How come "friends" only ever seem to need to use someone else's Ipad,phone etc when it is porn or escort related? It is so strange isn't it Hmm

Georgeofthejungle · 09/06/2017 23:07

For him to see the messages back from this woman his 'friend' must have left himself signed in on the iPad. Highly unlikely. This is bollocks.

Original poster
FeellikeLTB · 09/06/2017 23:07

We're on our way home, he's going back his mums. He's contacted his friend to send him the screenshot of the message he sent him because he can't find the message Confused

OP posts:
AnyFucker · 09/06/2017 23:09

People who swear on other lives are invariably lying, IMO

It's what they say to Jeremy Kyle just before they fail the lie detector test

Please don't tell me you are swayed by that bollocks

How did you get to talk with all the family around ?

mummymummums · 09/06/2017 23:09

He's had a while to think that up! No doubt he'll be able to show you the message to his friend.....oh hang on, he's probably deleted that like the browser history.
A mystery friend who was so desperate to contact a prostitute that he had to borrow an iPad.....

AyeAmarok · 09/06/2017 23:09

God, it took him two "naps" to come up with that cock and bull?

ChasedByBees · 09/06/2017 23:10

He's lying.

Original poster
FeellikeLTB · 09/06/2017 23:10

Anyfucker we went for a ciggie outside, the first I've had in a year and a half I could of smoked the whole packet!

OP posts:
Georgeofthejungle · 09/06/2017 23:13

Make sure you get dates on this message!

pictish · 09/06/2017 23:13

Bull. Shit.

AnyFucker · 09/06/2017 23:15

Lovey, he's a liar

Fletchasaurus · 09/06/2017 23:15

Sending support, I'll be honest though, I wouldn't believe him!

Piratesandpants · 09/06/2017 23:15

He's a liar. Presumably if he's fasting he's religious too - what a lovely hypocrite you've got there. Get rid.

TigerApplique · 09/06/2017 23:15

*People who swear on other lives are invariably lying, IMO

It's what they say to Jeremy Kyle just before they fail the lie detector test*

You are entitled to your own opinion, I am religious myself and swearing on someone's life is deemed very serious. And why you are comparing this to Jeremy Kyle I don't know.

OP I really think you should stop commenting and try and take some time out to think about what you are going to do.

C0RAL · 09/06/2017 23:17

You don't need another screen shot. You need the original message the friend send DH with wth screen shot attached .

user1491260401 · 09/06/2017 23:19

I wonder what his "friend" said that made the other women at the side message back calling him a "pervert"?

LoveDeathPrizes · 09/06/2017 23:20

So what website was it? Presumably his friend had a username to be private messaging. I'd be interested to see if and cross reference it with other escort sites and dates and locations.

Presumably his single friend works away with him? Why wouldn't he have VPN if he spent that much time in UAE? Particularly someone so inclined to use online sex.

C0RAL · 09/06/2017 23:21

Here's a copy of the screen shot that quick quick posted upthread.

I can send it to you or anyone. It doesn't prove that she sent it to me or I sent it to her.

AIBU or does this look like my husband has contacted an escort for sex??
LoveDeathPrizes · 09/06/2017 23:22

Even if his friend's on board, he's had time to ask for his help.

indigox · 09/06/2017 23:23

His "single friend" could very easily install his own VPN for free on any phone/laptop/ipad in about 2 minutes.

PyongyangKipperbang · 09/06/2017 23:23

Sweetie, as I said above, I know that you dont want this to be true, but you know deep in your heart that it is dont you?

The question isnt "Did he do it" but "He did it, cant I live with it?" Because that what it comes down to. Can you stay in a marriage where you know that your husband uses sex workers when he is away (and possibly when he is at home too). Some women can and do live like that, I dont think that you are one of them based on your posts here.

Be aware that one thing you will probably do (or want to do) over the next few days is have lots of sex with him. Its called hysterical bonding and its partly proving that he still wants you, partly proving that everything is fine and partly you proving that you can do better than the OW (be she a sex worker or not). Please try not to do this. I did it and when I have got over the initial adrenalin rush I felt disgusted with myself for doing it and him for taking advantage of the situation to get his leg over.