To be upset with DP
LouBlue1507 · 09/06/2017 08:15
Yesterday, I got up quickly from the sofa to get DD who is 10 months as I did, my knee 'popped' and gave way. There was some pain but I could hobble.
I was hobbling all evening and the pain has become increasingly worse. Ibuprofen isn't touching it. By bed time I could barely walk to bed.
This morning the pain is just as bad and I can only walk 2-3 steps before the pain is too bad and my knee can't support my weight. So buff shuffling it is.
I asked DP if he could not go to work today (he's a teacher) so he could help look after DD and drive me to the doctors as the pain means I can't drive. He's refused.
I'm really upset and in so much pain, we have no family near by and I'm struggling to look after DD. She's 10 months old and walking, she's into everything and despite babyproofing as best I can, I still need to get up and down to her.
AIBU to be upset with DP, should he have taken a day off work to help me so I can see a doctor?
Sirzy · 09/06/2017 08:24
A teacher can't just take a day off on a whim!
The fact he hasn't had a day off all year doesn't mean he can suddenly take one off.
It's not easy but sadly you can't expect him to take a day off. Lots of rest, ICE it and keep it elevated when you can and hopefully it will settle down soon.
44PumpLane · 09/06/2017 08:25
Home visit? taxi?
If he was in a job where he would work from home it might be good for him to support you by staying at home, but given he's a teacher and your injury isn't life threatening I think he's not unreasonable to go to work.
You are not unreasonable to feel sorry for yourself though and curse the situation.
Take care and hope you manage to get sorted.
LooksBetterWithAFilter · 09/06/2017 08:36
What Barbarian said. If the op is struggling to walk she will struggle to look after a 10 month old baby with no idea of danger. We hear all these people on posts saying you can't pop next door with a baby monitor in case there is a fire. Same thing applies here. Op is not capable of keeping baby safe if she can't walk, in these circumstances I think even a teacher taking a day off would be sensible. And she is unlikely to get a home visit. I'd love to know where all these people live that get home visits.
Tiptoethr0ughthetulips · 09/06/2017 08:36
My husband is a teacher and I know for a fact he wouldn't take a day off for this. It's just not done and tbh I wouldn't ask. If I were you I'd get a taxi to the GP and if he sends you for xray then take childcare from there. Have you got friends you could call on? Hopefully your DH will leave school straight away after last lesson and take over.
LouBlue1507 · 09/06/2017 08:42
No I don't have any friends in the area. I can try and get a home visit but I highly doubt that will happen.
It isn't just the fact I need to see a doctor, I can barely move and not capable of chasing after DD. She's so active, she won't stay still for a second!
We live in a flat and the doors don't close properly! Do DD keeps attempting to get through to the kitchen or to the bathroom etc.
arbrighton · 09/06/2017 08:50
There is a massive difference between the regular teacher, who has planned the lesson, marked the work, has rapport with the students, knows their names and someone (often not actually supply on day one, but an unqualified cover supervisor) parachuted in, with at best a scrawled repeat of work done or something dull from a book. Or, given your DH has half a day PPA, which suggests primary, a TA left to cover the class.
And PPA time is seriously precious. It's not a doss
Tinseleverywhere · 09/06/2017 08:54
I think no wonder you are upset as you are in a lot of pain and trying to care for an active toddler while not able to walk easily. But on the other hand some of the responses on here show the reaction your Dh would have got if he took the day off for this reason. Maybe not from the head but it can still make his life very difficult if colleagues think he is slacking off. So I would try to suck it up as much as possible and not get into a row with him about it. Get to the GP for some help with your knee and go from there.
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