To be mortified, or am I overreacting?

[mynotsoperfectlife]

We are on holiday at the moment, and when chatting to another family at the cottage we are staying at, DH announces that the children 'weren't planned.'

We've had a bit of a row about it. He says I'm being ridiculous and over reacting. I'm sitting upstairs avoiding him. Am I?

Thouh roundaboutthetown is being sarcastic the first thing I thought when I saw what the OP's husband actually said was it was quite an odd choice of words and almost implying she may not have planned them (due to the stage of life she was at) but he did.

Well it did come across like that. But anyway no worries.

Please accept my apology , I read through but missed the bit you had actually spoken to him at the time.

If he won't talk and is angry, it's becasue he knows he did wrong and doesn't like being pulled up on, so I think he won't do that again, have a good weekend...

None of my 3 children were " planned" , especially my third. I still have no idea how I came to be pregnant with him!Complete and utter surprise!
If I hadn't had these happy accidents, I would probably never have had children at all if I had 'planned' for the right moment. There has never been a right moment in our lives...by that I mean financially,we have had more than our fair share of ups and downs with redundancies etc.

YABU. These are casual aqauintances youll probably never hear from ever again. The best one my DH came out with one holiday was, discussing 'how you met' (these are common mindless holiday enquiries aka hairdresser comments) , and marriage proposals. After listening to some romantic gush from a couple who were clearly in relationship bragging mode, my DH said "when I proposed to Mrs Beanies, she was so shocked, she fell out of bed "
I found it v. funny. The anal retentives looked shocked. Truth was irrelevant. Youre putting way too much importance on 'impressing' the Jones'.

If he won't talk and is angry, it's becasue he knows he did wrong and doesn't like being pulled up on

Or alternatively, he is angry because he did nothing wrong and thinks the being pulled up on it is a complete overreaction to a throwaway comment. Especially if OP accused him of making her look like a nymphomaniac. As ever with MN, we only have one side of the story, and given some of the, quite frankly, odd things the OP has written, I see a good chance that he is a perfectly reasonable man who is just staying out of the way.

The nymphomaniac comment was meant partly to be taken in humour on here, I didn't actually say that. I'm sorry if I have said anything odd I think I may need to go to hospital.

I think it's about time you went and enjoyed your holiday now, instead of arguing on the Internet with strangers.

Nope don't go to hospital, go do something nice instead, popcorn and a movie, which film shall we watch, and we could go to the bar your on holiday, cocktails maybe?

Fuck off telling me what to do You

mynotsoperfectlife some people have said they understand where you're coming from; don't focus on the negative posts if they're upsetting.

If you think you may need to go to hospital due to feeling ill then you could dial 111.

Sorry that was a slight overreaction there. Huge apologies You but the idea of enjoying my holiday at the moment is beyond me, I feel utterly wretched. Please accept my apology.

If you don't feel well,mentally or physically,please seek help. No one here knows what's wrong or how you're feeling.

I know Rebel I'm not asking them to. I'm fine. Just a bit of pain and nausea!

mynotsoperfectlife what else is wrong, as if your still upset this has to be about more than the post it started with, and I suddenly feel like non of us are helping you, as we don't understand fully, I just wanted you to go feel the sunshine on your face, and enjoy the holday..

Don't worry I just haven't been well

Cake ,oh yes cake, a nice fat one with loads of topping,, come out to play, and let the sun heal your worries,,,,

Give yourself a break from your worries, and go hug a hubby, and little squidge kiddie, wish my H was still alive hug, and have a tiff with....

cos making up can be such fun

@mynotsoperfectlife what's wrong? What "hurts" so to speak?

In the circumstances you describe, it sounds like he was trying (and failing) to be amusing.

I think you're massively overreacting to be mortified and be avoiding being in his presence.

Probably should have said "Why did you say that to a room full of strangers you absolute tool? Bring me a drink and a snack and I'll consider forgiving you, you utter bell end". Argument over.

I absolutely did not say or suggest that it is ok for your sex life to be discussed but that is absolutely not what happened in the scenario you have given. I don't understand why you have asked if you're overreacting, most people have said yes but you have said you're not basically.

If he had said something personal about your sex life you would be absolutely right to be pissed off, I wouldn't disagree with you there but he really didn't.

I think it's perfectly reasonable to be irritated by what he said, then even more cross when he didn't care about your feelings.

If I told DH that what he said upset me, I'd expect him to avoid saying it again and preferable offer an apology, too.

People's feelings matter. OP felt upset about what he said and where he said it. That's ok!

I hope you feel better soon, OP. I'd have a sour stomach after a thread like this and a grumpy DH, too!

Most people make a baby by having a sex life.
It's kind of a VERY public acknowledgement of same.

WHY, nearly eight hours later??

Why what?