Behaviour at school play yesterday

[user1485342611]

We had:

The woman who put her child standing on a chair for a better view, despite the fact they were up near the front, and then stood herself for the remainder of the performance.

The baby who was allowed cry and disrupt the performance several times before the mother took her out

The family who all clattered in late and settled themselves with much scraping of chairs.

The whiny toddler whose parents loudly accommodated him, 'do you want to sit on my lap' 'here's a biscuit' etc

The adults who chatted together when their child wasn't on stage

And the mother who answered two phone calls during the play.

Not to mention the parents holding their phones up in front of everyone to record the whole thing.

Are some adults incapable of showing a bit of cop on and consideration for half a bloody hour?

HoldBackTheRain

No-one is asking you or expecting you to reply to me. I was replying to the OP. I'm sorry if it gets on your nerves that I answered the OP's question, but it doesn't require an answer from you, does it?

It's not bloody Shakespear

I imagine your appalling attitude would be exactly the same if it was. Such graceless lack of manners.

Sadly this isn't new. My DC1 is 31, and I can remember her school plays and similar issues. We didn't have mobiles then, but there were always the dads with the video cameras standing up in front of people.

I'd leave my 3 pre schoolers with (3 different) friends, as instructed, and it was always the family there with mum, dad and grandparents who had to bring their noisy toddler.

It's inconsiderate parents like Fliptophead that see schools banning younger children and babies from audiences.

If I had a young baby with me, I would of course try and keep said baby quiet and happy (preferably asleep) but if said baby did cry, I wouldn't leave straight away. I would move to the back to try and calm my baby so that my child on the stage can clearly see that I am there for them and not putting one above the other. The only reason I am there is to see my child on the stage and have them know I was there.
Why does your child trump mine? Why do you get to see your child perform their one line but I don't get to see my child perform theirs? You can't always get a sitter or someone to take the baby. Also if baby is breastfed and feeds every couple hours you can't really give them to someone else, can you?
I agree that the behaviour you outlined is bad and rude, but a crying baby isn't. We've ALL been there. When you're child was a baby I'm sure their cries annoyed someone else.

thelonelyscriptures - the moment your young baby starts crying / fussing loudly, IMO everyone else's child trumps yours. Just because the baby is at the back crying it is still disturbing it for everyone else.

When my youngest was a baby I explained to the older sibling that if his sister made a noise then I would have to leave. There's only 18 months between them so my eldest had to grasp this concept from a young age.

@StripeyCurtains that's in your opinion though. In my opinion no other child is more important than mine to me. I am courteous, and polite, and when I said stand at the back I meant while trying to calm said baby, but I'm sorry, my child isn't going to be disappointed just because you find my other child irritating.

I think the main reason to take out upset or restless babies or toddlers is to help the children who are trying to sing or say their lines.

It's really distracting for them more than anyone else.

I'm sorry, my child isn't going to be disappointed just because you find my other child irritating.

But it's ok to upset 30 other DCs? Selfish doesn't begin to cover that attitude. Awful.

Also if baby is breastfed and feeds every couple hours you can't really give them to someone else, can you?

How long do you think the play is

@WateryTart how are they upset? If my baby is whinging at the back? They can still see their parents, they will be singing on the stage so won't hear much over each other and the music.
Do you put other people ahead of your child?

@Gileswithachainsaw oh come on, we all know that breastfed babies feed when they want. Guarantee that they'll be screaming once you've left or that day will be a cluster feeding day.

they will be singing on the stage so won't hear much over each other and the music

Not in our performances, it's reception and Nursery only, 3-5 year olds, easily distracted.

I think it's so rude when a parent lets a baby cry through a performance. All the children and teachers have often spent weeks practicing their lines and can be so put off by a crying baby. I always sat at the back and was ready to walk out if my baby started making a noise that could ruin it for others. As for photo taking...our school has always allowed parents to take photos with a request that they don't go on social media. Last year a woman sat behind me shoved her phone up level with my face to take photos and videos, and kept using the flash. A woman sat next to me kept putting her phone in front of my view line, until I did the same to her, and she stopped.

Re. filming on phones. My DD's school allows this as they never make their own DVDs. I never bothered for the reasons in this thread. Then my DD had a solo in a performance. She was spellbindingly good. I find a lot of parenting difficult but this really was one of the best moments of my life watching her sing it. I know it's not important in the grand scheme of things but I really regret not recording it so we could hear it again.

So I started bringing my phone ready to record. She has not had another solo (quite rightly to give others a go. She has since decided to leave the choir and refused to sing the song ever again . This reminds me to ask the school again if they would consider a DVD that parents could buy.

I often think it would be a good idea for schools who allow recording of these things to get a parent or teacher with a decent camera to pop it at the back and be official videographer, ban all other recording equipment and thebmake the video privately available to parents to download afterwards.

Ours did this at a recent performance. School camera in the centre isle, no phones please, all explained in advance over email. It worked brilliantly and we were all sent download links a few days later.

I mean centre aisle. Not sure whether that was autocorrect or my exhaustion tbh!

And for those mums who say the children on stage aren't bothered by babies crying through a performance....yes they are. I remember my child in year four telling me how him and his friends were upset at the baby crying who "ruined it all".

The problem with schools saying they will do the video is that when there are so many kids in our school they are all sat down the sides too. So presumably the camera will focus on the stage only and half the kids won't be in the video.

Ah, the school /nursery play audience..there's no more an accurate reflection of societies selfishness, as demonstrated by some of the responses in this thread.
Basically parents should be read the riot act , in a letter before the performance and before it starts. There should be no filming or taking photos, all phones to be switched off. a video and photo stack should be made available taken by a professional or keen amateur. If a baby starts crying, you will be required to leave - the comfort of the performers and audience is more important than one baby crying.
It won't happen of course, as we don't live in a respectful society any longer.

Except a baby is usually crying for a reason. Yes if the baby will not stop then leave, but the first murmur? Wouldn't you try and comfort the baby first? Feed them perhaps? Pick them up? Christ for a bunch of parents you're quite heartless.

If it's crying in the play then it's not feeding though is it.

Yes that makes sense Mumzy. I do think if they could fix that through a video would also help the baby crying problem. If you know it is your only chance to se the show maybe you are more likely to stay in. If you know it's available on DVD maybe you are more likely to take the baby out?

Christ for a bunch of parents you're quite heartless

Utter nonsense!

I think you should reflect on your selfish attitude actually.

@StillStayingClassySanDiego would you like to end that with 'young lady'?
How patronising are you?!