Would you find it strange if mother/daughter spend a lot of time together?

[user1490817986]

What would you think if you saw a childless single woman in her 20's always out with her mum - i'm talking every other day?

I'd think it was nice. I'm NC with my mum, but I'm very close to my gran and if she didn't live in Wales I would probably have a similar relationship with her.

I know a woman who is a lone parent with 4 daughters early 20s to 30s and i see her dotting about with 1 or 2 of her Dds and combos of grandchildrens all the time it is lovely they are the happiest nicest family I know and i think it is so nice seeing mums and daughters enjoying each others company.

I would think it's sweet. From school age (16) til I started uni I worked with my mum at my Saturday job and we did loads together in the week too. Sadly I've moved away but we are still very close and I'd go out with my mum shopping, lunch etc all the time if I could.

Have to add I've always had friends/partners etc but I always loved hanging out with my mum too. Most of my friends were similar except maybe 1 or 2 who didn't get on well with their mum til they were in their 20s

I think it's nice to be close, but I think a parent has failed a bit if a NT adult child is tagging onto their parent rather than living their own life (which can of course invlove seeing lots of their parents.. but so long as that's as well as finding their own place in the world, not instead of!)

When she was alive I saw her at least once a week and spoke another time. She lived about 3 miles away from me at the time. I also occasionally went away with her to visit relatives. I was living with them DP, worked f/t & had friends. I think it's different if it's an unheard relationship - and it can happen.

*unhealthy

Not odd. Maybe, not the accepted norm. You've no idea of their situation. Not everyone has a wide range of friends; not everyone wants that. I've holidayed with my Mum and it was brilliant. I've holidayed with friends and come back wondering what on earth we have in common.

Umm. Could you possibly mind your own business?

im super close to my mum. We do loads of things together. I dont see it as particularly weird. Lots of people are close to their mums. I have other friends too

just of course, I apologise, I forget that some people have jobs that are not 9-5!

I'd wonder why they didn't have a job?!

Why? I know of a Mum & Daughter like this who are joined at the hip. Do the school runs together the lot. Transpired the daughter had huge anxiety and couldn't get out by herself for years and her DCs still needed to get to school, her husband couldn't help because of the hours he works so her mum did instead. Her mum has a job too, she works it around when her DD needs her.

LaLegue sorry, I get a bit defensive with my girls. My apologies also. Thankyou.

what a horrible thread and the potential to make people feel odd or feel bad.
horrible and judgy and a little cruel.
you don't no people situation or why they are with whom.it could be nothing to do with dependency it might be all sorts of reasons.but so what. how to make people feel bad eh...

It sounds totally foreign to me, but nice I'd think.

and what if it is over a carer.or anxiety ,putting dependency and odd onto this is not nice.there relationship could be just as healthy or beatufiul even if the situation they found themselves in is different to yours or most would idealy have it

Well put, Kateandme

I go everywhere with my son. He has Aspergers. He looks normal, as such but is soically inept.

Thanks all. I have autism and the daughter in the OP is me. I'm very close to my mum but also co-dependent because I struggle to live a normal life. I'm worried that people think I'm weird sometimes because I only have my mum who I trust.

OP This is really impossible to answer in the absence of a bit of contextualising info?

IE: a DM & DD who have their own lives but are also super close = normal, but at the other extreme a co-dependent relationship borne out of emotional incest (EG via the DM inappropriately leaning on the DD earlier in life) would be neither normal nor healthy.

FWIW, thread is making me sad TBH. I too envy others who have great relationships with their Mums but mine, like many others on here, passed away so I would echo the PP who said to value them whilst you can

Tbh the answer on that one is that it doesnt matter what others are thinking.
If it works for you and your mum, then so be it.

For years, my parents were overseas and i never saw them more than a week a year. I often wished that i could see them that often.
My mum is still the one person I talk to the most atm - various reasons to that that have no relation with any SN. I wouldnt change that for the world.

I'd think it was lovely.

I'm close to my mum, see her every week and we go on holidays together.

I'm married, but no kids.

It's not odd, we're just close. If you think it's odd, I think it's a shame you don't have the same great relationship with your mum (generic you, not you specifically OP!).

X-post. If you are able to in any way gradually build up your own life as well as being so close to your Mum then that would likely serve you well, but past that I'm out of my depth.

Love being with my mum, speak to her most days. Ditto daughter. Lots if days out together..why not?

My mother lives abroad. I'm lucky if I see her once a year. I would be envious of a woman who could see her mother that frequently. :(