To be extremely upset that DD wants to go to a local, not very well-respected uni?

[HarryandHolly72]

Hi, DD is heading off to uni in September; she is 19. She has some great A-Levels (AAA) and could pick some better unis! She wasn't ready to move out so held back for a year and has worked and has saved about 6k. She claims she still isn't ready to move out but really wants to head off to uni now. I think it's such a waste

I'm not going to put the uni name as I don't think it's fair to people studying there, but it isn't the most respected and is pretty low down. She also wants to do something that's quite competitive and hard to get into imho (Biochemistry).

She doesn't want to move to the campus either. She is helpful around the house and does her bit, so it's not because I don't want her here. I just think it's a huge waste.

AIBU?

One thing that she needs to think about is the potential difference in the level of challenge offered in different subjects between universities. Going to a low ranked university often means being in classes with students who did not do terribly well, which means that there will be less peer stimulation and also academics' attention will likely be on pleasing the less bright and/or engaged students so that they pass and the academic gets a good evaluation. Sometimes, subjects will be taught at the softer end, if you get my drift. Consider staff workloads as well. These are higher in some universities than others and a high ratio of students to staff across the board will mean less attention individually. This isn't just about the numbers in a lab class, it is about how many classes an individual academic is taking.

19 isn't very late at all imo. I imagine more and more students will prefer to stay at home for uni if it's possible to save costs.

Has your daughter looked at the average starting salaries for graduates from the respective universities? Maybe would show her that generally, a higher-ranked uni will result in a higher salary, both to start on and in the long run - and therefore the lower-ranked university is quite a short-sighted option that could really disadvantage her going forward, and for many years at that (if the difference between the two is as marked as you say.) I would also look at employment rates - are students at the lower ranked institution struggling to find graduate jobs after they leave? Don't be distracted by the employment rate, ensure its GRADUATE employment, or else someone leaving uni and then working in Asda as a shelf-stacker will be counted.

The whole RG university thing is very overblown, I say that as someone who went to one. I now work in a university established in the 60's which I'd never considered attending as my 6th Form were so snobbish about the need to attend a redbrick.

Look at the subject tables and book to visit a couple of other unis just so she can compare and contrast. The university league tables are useful as they take into account graduate employment and student experience.

I think your Dd is being very sensible, saving up, not wanting to take on too much debt.

I think you're right in thinking she should try to get into the best uni she can, but as a pp has said biochemistry is a very useful degree.

I've known a lot of biochemists with good jobs in a wide variety of roles (i.e. not just research) - and they didn't all go to good unis.

Russell Group Universities are great for people who aspire to academia and research: they are the best research universities generally. If your DD wants to work in Industry then spending more on a degree from a research uni rather than getting a great grade in a more applied discipline is a waste.
Further: speaking as someone who started off at a Poly and ended up in a senior academic position at a very well regarded University before moving into industry I can promise you that if she does shift focus to research she can get into masters or doctorate programmes at Russell group or elsewhere later. If she is happier at home then she is making the right choice for her.

..and I will say that 'better' uni isn't better for everyone. It's just different.

Does she understand that all degrees are not equal and that the institution that it's from has a bearing on how valuable it is considered to be? Also, at 19 she should (IMO) be making her own way and living away from home to get the full university experience. If this is possible for the family financially, of course.

Try and encourage her to go to a couple of open days with you at universities within an hour or so of your home. At least then she will have something to compare her choice with.
But at the end of the day she needs to be happy with her choice. My friends DD ended up at her local university due to missing her grades and going through clearing. She lived at home for the first year but moved out for second year and is very happy. My DD dropped out of her more prestigious uni in first year as she was very unhappy - she is now doing a different degree at a uni that is less than an hour away and comes home very regularly and is now very happy.

Also, OP didn't see she was being ambitious going for that course! She is overqualified for the course at the local uni. OP said the INDUSTRY was competitive, hence her concern that her daughter wants to do the degree at a less prestigious university

Say, not see

Isn't it a bit late for the angst, given she has presumably already accepted the place by now?

Also, it may be true that 'most places have an RG university fairly nearby', but sometimes that means your two local ones are Oxford vs Oxford Brookes, or Cambridge vs Anglia Ruskin, so you don't just get to pick the one you prefer!

YetAnotherSpartacus: "Going to a low ranked university often means being in classes with students who did not do terribly well, which means that there will be less peer stimulation and also academics' attention will likely be on pleasing the less bright and/or engaged students so that they pass and the academic gets a good evaluation."

I think that's true. I would be concerned in the OP's place - it's not just that going to a uni with a good reputation improves your job prospects (though it does), but the university experience itself will be better, in that she'll be mixing with other clever students and will probably be more engaged with the course.

And "good" doesn't have to mean Russell Group. There are lots of very good non-RG unis, such as Bath or Reading, for example. Some of the former polys have good reputations these days. But there are also an awful lot of former polys and former colleges of HE that are not so great. And the tuition fees will be the same in all of them, so might as well go to one that will challenge and stimulate her.

Well she can choose which ever uni she wants.

You can choose if you want her to live at home.!!

I guarantee this, neither of our children will be living at home when they go to Uni!!

why - why wouldn't you let them? if they really wanted to, you'd just throw them out?

I also don't see anything wrong with her staying home and working in a related job such as a lab until she is 21 and ready to move out/on.

Attending university is expensive and I think it's something which really needs to be thought out. Personally knowing what I know now I would have taken a very different path becoming an accountant via experience and then taking an MBA for my academic qualification.

From my understanding, and I am probably wrong on this as so much has changed, but it used to be that if over 21 you were classified as a mature student and funding from parents wasn't considered for student finances. It is what I should have done as my father refused to pay for university leaving me to pay for 100% of it. Thank goodness tuition fees were only £1k back then and I was able to hustle to earn enough each year.

Why not, if they take a year off they'll be 20

No reason for a young adult to live with mummy and daddy when at uni!! Of course wouldn't throw them out but would stongly encourage them to be independent

You could casually mention to her that you'll be thinking of downsizing in a year or so, OP, or moving to Scotland/Wales/Cornwall. It might crystallize her thoughts on whether the university itself, rather than the place, is what she wants.

Sorry, 'place' as in location, not place on the course.

Parents Finances are now considered for student loan until you're 25. That's unless you are married or have lived independentally for 3 years

One of DS's university friends is in that position, Want2b. His parents disapprove of his choice of university and have refused to fund his course, but their income is still taken into account.

The lad's doing a perfectly sensible science degree at a perfectly decent place .

YABU and sound like a snob

DS2 did exactly this last year. He got 5 As in his Highers but chose somewhere with lower entry requirements. He has completed his first year with flying colours and has decided to move into a flat for second year.

Looking back I don't know why we agonised so much. He is very happy with his choice and would not have liked somewhere with cloisters and quadrangles.

I agree with another PP that if you're studying biochemistry and want to go into a related job, then university choice is really important.

If there are two CV's one from someone who has a 2:1 from Imperial compared to one from Stafford, they are going to interview the Imperial candidate.

There are a couple of things you could try to change her mind:
You can look up university rankings per subject and show her.
If she does have a choice of career post-university, she can contact them and they can tell her if it will make a difference. For example HR at AstroZeneca can be contacted on.
[email protected]

My nephew also made a mistake with his university and even with a 2:1 he is struggling to get his foot in the door.

YABU and sound like a snob

How is it being a snob to want your children to have the best education their grades will get them into?