To not want to send my kids to school today?

[NoCapes]

I'm in Manchester, I was kept awake most of the night listening to sirens and helicopters flying overhead
I feel sick to my stomach about what has happened (as I'm sure we all do) particularly as it is so close to home and I could hear it
Now while I know its massively unlikely anything will happen today, my anxiety is telling me to keep my babies at home with me today

I did say I don't want to, I didn't say any of the crap that's being said on here; that I'm going to keep them off and frighten them all day
I said I don't want to send them in, that I want to keep them at home

YANBU at all keep the bay home x

Nobody has said they are "fine and dandy with children being killed" ffs OP. What a fucking horrible thing to say.

I don't think you're making this about you OP. You're understandably shaken! Heck I'm not Manchester but I'm shaken. When it's close to home it's terrifying. Just because it happens elsewhere all the time doesn't make the impact any less. And yes, you're not directly involved but thats why we call them shockwaves.. there's still an impact even if you're not at the centre of the tragedy. But send them in anyway. School will talk to them about what's happened and I'm sure that will be helpful. You don't want your kids to be afraid.

You have to remember that the reason that we're so shocked and upset by this is that it is thankfully a rare event, and there will be much tighter security at concerts from now on so it is very unlikely to ever happen again.

I don't want to send myself to work today. God knows how I'd feel if I had kids.

As much as we are meant to carry on and show them we won't be deterred, let's be honest, we are deterred. I'm thinking twice know about everyday things, getting the tram, going Trafford Centre, etc.

It's sickening.

Carry on as normal, do not let them win.

If by 'close to home' you mean that your home and/or the school are close enough to the site that parents doing the school run would get in the way of emergency services, then perhaps a later arrival (or even a day off) might be a sensible thing to do. Check your school's website.

And, even though your intention is not to make your DC fearful, I think there is a very strong possibility that you are fostering the conditions for that to happen by acting on your anxiety.

Yes, there will be a lot of people who are feeling shaken today for all sorts of reasons. I hope you can find a supportive friend at the bad moments.

The individualistic perspective demonstrated by the OP here scares me more than any terrorist. Because it is held by so many.

Your children weren't there, they are safe and well. Grieve for the poor people killed and injured but it absolutely baffles me that people can turn such tragedy around to their own lives. How does this affect me? Seems to be the first thought for so many

Lovely mn responses.

Op yanbu to be scared, to want to keep your kids home. Of course you won't. Honestly it's like a competition to see who can be the biggest smart arse. Can people just try to be nice for a change?

I'm sorry it is making you feel anxious. That's totally understandable I think you wanted a bit of reassurance and to be heard. You've had some cruel posts. 🙄

Yanbu op, I think just for today it's ok to take some time out and cuddle your babies.

I'm sorry but I don't think you've had particularly harsh responses given that it really isn't about you. Did you really post in AIBU for reassurance?

I'm sad and sorry for those who are directly affected. I'm sorry you feel afraid because these things are scary but it isn't about you. It does seem that, lately, when a terror attack happens, we get these threads about people's own anxieties and everyone crawls all over it.

Totally understand how you must feel, I don't think you're making it about you at all. Can completely understand why you just want to cuddle your babies today. Just do what feels right for you, nobody would judge you for a day of cuddles on the couch.

'I'm sorry it is making you feel anxious. That's totally understandable I think you wanted a bit of reassurance and to be heard. You've had some cruel posts. '

Absolutely. Op I'm 2 hrs away from Manchester and I wanted to keep my kids home today as well. Of course I haven't but yes I'm scared, yes the terrorists have won today because they have killed and scared people. Can we just accept that at least for today?

Again I never ever once said this was 'about me' ffs

I don't think this would be the right thing to do for your children.

TrueColors in Manchester we are affected. We don't know yet but these may be people we know, or our children know. We also now know that someone in our midst would do this. Something has changed forever and I think OP is not 'making it all about her' to acknowledge that.

Are you going to apologise for that horrible comment then op?

NoCapes of course you are really shaken and upset. I had close family near the Westminster attack. The hours after were horrendous until I had them home and safe, even though they hadn't seen anything and weren't involved. Sending them back into London the next day took a bit of an act of courage andre defiance.

That's the thing about terrorism, it is designed to cause fear amongst wider people. I understand your need to keep your children close. For their sake though, they need to be with their friends, doing normal things at school. It's the best way to keep their mental health safe and to teach them resilience. We need our kids to be strong and well and keeping them going as normal is the best thing for them.

Huge hugs to you and everyone who is shaken and upset today.

NoCapes you're traumatised. Aibu is a harsh forum and people are all full of their own stuff.
Do whatever you think you need to do to nurture yourself and your children, and shut out the comments that think attacking you is somehow clever.
We all get traumatised by these things in different ways and need different paths to heal. There's no right way to do it.

OP your title and post did suggest that you were asking if it would be unreasonable to keep them off school.

If you had explained in your original post that you wanted to keep them off but were sending them in you would have had different responses.

What happened is tragic and to suggest some posters don't care is really not on.

And I'm sorry but your post does come accross as self indulgent.

OK... it did sound from your thread title and OP that you were asking whether it would be reasonable not to send your kids to school. So people answered that.

It is natural for us all to be shocked to the core, to want to keep our kids close, and it is not unreasonable to feel frightened.

It would be unreasonable to act on that fear and keep your kids off school.

I don't understand why people can't just show the op a bit of kindness. Why be so quick to snipe after such a shocking event.

People will be scared. It won't last, but at least today it's is totally understandable.

I can understand why you want to keep your kids close today but think you should send them. An IRA bomb went off near to where I lived as a child. It seemed unusual and scary but a bit abstract to us children. However I think we would have been terrified and confused if our parents had reacted by keeping us at home. Routine gives kids security.