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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be fed up of this aggressive baking

415 replies

JHMJHM · 20/05/2017 08:55

DH comes home at least once a month with yet another bakery offering from a woman he works with. I don't get when this became a thing? He defends it by saying how 'nice' it is and that she just likes 'making cakes' but I find it fucking odd and it really irks me.

To be honest I am queasy over other peoples baked goods- and I am sick of seeing her brownies seeping over my work surfaces. I don't get it at all and it boils my piss that DH cant see that it is WIERD. Why do people think they need to invest the time (and expense!) into feeding them their foul cakes? Its not like my DH is ill or thin, he is pretty robust.

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
Greyponcho · 22/05/2017 07:43

Cakes are brought into a workplace.
Same cakes then leave the workplace to be taken home.
What is this strange phenomenon you speak of?
has only brought homemade cupcakes in to work today due to an overflow from a relatives birthday over the weekend
Grin

Oblomov17 · 22/05/2017 07:45

Ha ha. And all these:

"Oh no. I could never eat something that someone else has prepared. Who knows what their kitchen is like."

Nice to see paranoia and anxiety still rife on MN.

I don't worry about such things. Give me coffee and walnut any day. Gobble gobble.... shoves more crispy cremes in gob ....

Greyponcho · 22/05/2017 07:50

If the situation was thus:
OPDH: Sandra at work made us cakes again
OP: Sandra who is always off ill with food poisoning?/the scruffy one who has no sense of hygiene/the one who picks her nose and eats it?
OPDH: yeah, she's the one
OP:

All other scenarios not in the same vein as the above indicate an unreasonable/OTT baking-related paranoia

Willow2017 · 22/05/2017 07:58

Desire me what a fuss over some cake.

You don't like cake your dh does.
People in the office being in cakes if there is any left people take it home. Big deal.

'Not professional' Really? How sexist. I notice it's only not professional because they are women. If there was a man baking would it be ok?

Just because other women in the 'upper echelons' (WTAF?) Don't bake for the office it makes them better than those who do? That's not feminism. That's deciding that all women should act exactly the way you deem fitting. Feminism should mean that women get to chose what hobby they want, that they enjoy, without condemnation from other women never mind men.

Your dh has as much right to enjoy someone else's cakes as you have not to eat it. Nobody is forcing you to eat it. Just let it go.

Willow2017 · 22/05/2017 08:00

Dearie me not desire me!

Oblomov17 · 22/05/2017 08:16

Are you the type of person who, at a dinner party, the host offers your dh seconds:

Oh go on Brian. Have another roast potato....
(You look like the kind of man who only is only normally allowed 2)

And the wife says : No Brian, you've had enough.

And you feel like screaming at her: He's 65. He can decide himself if he wants another roastie.!!

CuppaSarah · 22/05/2017 08:58

Haven't read the thread, but obviously she's been accepted as a contestant on bake off and has too much cake from all her rehearsal bakes. I take it op won't be cheering her on.

burdog · 22/05/2017 15:45

I think if she is specifically baking for OP's husband and no-one else in the office it is quite weird. But I haven't read the rest of the thread. Hands in the air don't care.

ladymariner · 22/05/2017 16:10

burdog She bakes for the whole office. Op is a jealous sourpuss not a cake lover. Op's dh is. He brings leftover cake home. Op spits her dummy out.

MrsDesireeCarthorse · 22/05/2017 16:13

You are really fucking weird.

Badcat666 · 22/05/2017 16:20

Bloody hell I wish MrBC would come home with cakes. I'm the mug that normally sends him in with some as his work colleagues tend to plead with him for my moist and tasty wares.

Cuppaoftea · 22/05/2017 16:41

I take it a few people have missed the fact that Op's DH doesn't even eat the cakes Confused

But still accepts tubs full every fortnight to bring home even though he knows Op and their kids won't have them either so they go hard and mouldy before being chucked out. Every 2 weeks! All because he feels awkward about politely saying no thank you.

This woman is wasting her money and time thinking these cakes are being enjoyed.

bonbonours · 22/05/2017 17:26

YABU
Most people like cake. Some people enjoy making cake. Therefore it's generally seen as a nice thing if people who bake give cake to people who like cake. People who don't like cake are rarely, if ever, forced to eat it.....

NancyWake · 22/05/2017 17:27

I'm not one to turn down brownies.

CookingDinner · 22/05/2017 17:29

I'll probably get slated for this, but I've always felt that baking is quite an easy thing to do with a little practice. If you bake loads, and loads and constantly give people your baking, then you probably don't have much else going on in your life. A lot of time on your hands. You possibly don't have any other amazing talents, so you feel specifically proud of your baking skills. Sorry guys, I've always felt that!

So instead of feeling angry with her, I'd feel a little sorry for her. It's in the same category as people who run loads, talk about running all the time, post photos of themselves running, etc. Just a bit boring.

However, your feelings about it are quite extreme. Do you worry excessively about cleanliness? Hygiene?

Luluandizzy · 22/05/2017 17:34

I think there is some obviously some insecurities or issues on your side. This women probably likes baking and is simply being kind? The problem is you not her. You sound pretty miserable, angry and slightly bitter? If someone was doing something cruel or unfair I'd understand your negativity. But someone is doing something kind and your whining over it? Really?

SadieTheNurse · 22/05/2017 17:51

I'm completely with you on this. My mil does it & drives me bananas.

It's not as if you can plan when the fucking cake is coming either, I might've just made one. It's like present giving, waste of time money etc

And the bloody Tupperware / tin sat in the hall for ages until we next see her Angry

IheartDodo · 22/05/2017 17:58

FWIW I don't think you're being that weird... If there are tubs of uneaten cake sitting in your kitchen then such a waste of food (and taking up space) would annoy me. It's a completely different situation to eating cake at work or just taking one portion home.
I occasionally bake for everyone at work, but there's hardly ever leftovers. I have occasionally made someone a birthday cake, but specifically making cakes for one person at regular intervals, and expecting them to take it all home?? that is weird!

Catherinebee85 · 22/05/2017 18:07

Obsessive expensive and compulsive? Really?!

I get that you don't have a sweet tooth but it feels very, very odd that you can find it in yourself to get so riled about cake!

BertrandRussell · 22/05/2017 18:15

Can't be that often can it if it's sitting there for ages? Hmm
And you could always put the tin in a cupboard........

UsedToBeAPaxmanFan · 22/05/2017 18:35

I like baking but don't often get the time to do it. When I do have the time, I make cakes for my team at work. Ds1 and I don't eat cake so it's wasted on us. Ds2 and dh do like cake ro I usually make a smaller one for them as well.

I've always thought it was a nice, friendly thing to do. And I do it because I like my work colleagues. I don't think any of them ever take my cake home because it always gets scoffed. But if there was some leftover then I'd hope it was taken home by someone who would eat it.

OP you sound completely ridiculous. And very insecure.

euromorris · 22/05/2017 18:50

This thread is so fucking weird.

Either eat the cake, or throw it out. Don't leave it for ages before chucking it. And if your hubby never eats it, tell him to grow a spine and not bring it home.

Poor woman. She's done nothing wrong, but she's getting the blame regardless.

Bloody love cake. She should come and work at my office instead.

LisaC7 · 22/05/2017 18:51

I wish I worked with that woman Smile

LunchBoxPolice · 22/05/2017 19:02

So....you don't want the cake?

JenziW · 22/05/2017 19:23

Please forward these unwanted cakes to me!
Cake is my favourite thing (as the size my waist...and all the rest of me shows!)

Haven't read all of the thread.