Too think people should stop commenting on people's choice of 'hot weather' clothes

[user1485342611]

I know people who are self conscious about their arms, legs, or birthmarks or whatever and are always very careful to dress in a way that hide them. Most of them dread Summer because they will be met with constant comments of 'would you. not be cooler in a t-shirt, that top must be very warm', 'I could lend you a pair of shorts. You must be sweltering in those jeans', 'Do you not think it's time to ditch the tights until Winter'?

I remember, years ago, when I was very self conscious, being at the receiving end of some of those comments myself and really hating the first days of Summer.

So AIBU to think that people should stop commenting to friends or relatives about how they choose to dress on a Summer's day? They're probably feeling self conscious enough without you sticking your oar in.

YANBU. When I was a lot heavier (think 6+ stones) I HATED spring/summer for this very reason. It's bad enough feeling self conscious and dreading the weather getting hotter let alone having other people comment on what you're wearing. I spent years wearing black trousers and long t-shirts or shirts, with trainers like converse, even when it was sweltering. I was comfortable, and marginally less self-conscious dressed like this, even if I was hotter than if I'd had shorts or a summer dress on. I didn't need anyone to tell me I'd be less hot in less clothes!!!!

I have self harm scars on my arms and in the summer the amount of people that tell me I should put long sleeves on to cover them up is astonishing

I have a big scar from an operating on my arm and people have said I should cover it up! Like, no. Actually. I don't mind it.

Wearing tights, a woolly jumper or other 'winter' clothes in summer will attract comments the same way wearing shorts in winter would. I don't think people are being rude, just confused.

Why not wear summer clothes that cover up? Long sleeved loose-fitting tops, lightweight trousers or palazzo pants, shirt dresses with dark leggings, maxi dresses with a cardigan?

I've lived in the UK all my life and I usually wear t-shirts/vest tops from April/May - October. I see plenty of others dressed the same way.

I know. You're all nuts.

"it's so much easier to find clothes that are forgiving and comfortable than in the winter"

where is this parallel universe?

Plus, to buy clothes you need money. If money is an issue, given UK weather, doesn't make sense to buy much summerwear.

Also colour is really important wear trousers in navy and people will comment, same trousers in seersucker or pale blue and you look summery.

Lweji nuts, really? I guess I've just been getting it wrong for 57 years then. Thanks for letting me know.

OP's main point is that comments that imply people should be dressed differently are rude.

People might not have many clothes. Things about their bodies they wish to cover up.

No one else's business.

Perhaps close family is a bit different, but I wouldn't make critical remarks about friends or family members' clothing.

I do love people who go all out at the first sign of sun though, it makes me smile!
It's like that where I live, if the sun comes out the girls/women break out the hot pants and mini skirts and crop tops, and boys/men break out the shorts and lose their tops Me on the other hand will still be in boots, jeans and a jacket/coat.

YANBU. It's so rude to comment on what someone's wearing except to compliment it.

Thanks for letting me know.

You're welcome. :)

Yes, does my head in. Am 33 weeks pregnant atm. Live abroad, its normally roasting by now but has been dull and clammy this year. Still working FT. Decided to wear sandals anyway because they are comfier than closed shoes and there isn't a day that someone doesn't comment. Am dying to wear my loose summer dresses over this huge bump but just can't be arsed with all the "someone's warm" etc etc etc because I am liable to tell someone to f off at some point v soon and it wont go down well...

I think it can be particularly hard at the beginning of Summer. You will always get the people who are ready, at the first sign of sun, to jump into something light and airy and more revealing than Winter clothes.

Most people need a slight period of adjustment, and others need to really psyche themselves up to wear more revealing clothes, or require time to shop for clothes that look summery but don't show too much - which can be difficult to find.

Totally agree with you OP. Long standing body issues since I was a teenager. I'm tall and a size 14 so I know in my head I'm not huge, but the idea of wearing shorts or a skirt any shorter than knee length without tights terrifies me. Anyone who has the confidence to wear what they want in summer is amazing, to me. Wish I could do it. I usually opt for hareem type pants, a vest top and some sort of baggy shirt over the top, and in that I'm half way comfortable.

YANBU, I'm no longer self conscious about my scars, but the drugs I'm on don't react well to sunlight and I have to stay covered up. Sun screen doesn't cut it.

seersucker now that's a word I haven't heard in years 😁

nocapes. I often wish you were my friend IRL

I can't believe people actually say you should cover your scars up?! How fucking rude & shallow are they!! There's absolutely NO need to cover them up at all.

Now, my Bingo Wings are quite another story! Sleeveless tops are SO much cooler, but I just can't bring myself to wear them in public.

Weirdly enough though, my legs stopped being a thing of beauty a long time ago, but I'll happily wear shorts & anyone that doesn't approve can go to fuck

I wish people were less judgemental too, but such is life and I'm FAR from perfect in the 'not judging' stakes - just about different things :/

I never have any skin other than face and hands showing as I'm Muslim. I do get a bit fed uo about being asked if I'm hot. Covering up with nice cool fabrics is quite sensible in the summer, I don't get burnt!

I have this weird habit when it comes to what other people wear - I assume it's none of my business and wouldn't dream of commenting. That's assuming I even notice.

I run warm but don't wear shorts etc in the summer as I don't like to show my legs in any way (same with skirts).

I get it the other way though - I don't wear a coat unless the weather is really appalling and once some randomer felt it was okay to stop me to ask why I was walking home in the snow without a coat.

Why on earth would anyone think it is okay to comment on someone's choice of clothes?

I had the opposite - I used to powerwalk to an overheated train and then to an overheated office, so wore short sleeved light tops in winter and often walked with no coat.

A lady at work was always cold. She once said to me "how are you hot? Do you have hormonal problems or something?"

For real! I had actually had 2 5 month gaps in my period and was tested for PCOS, so this comment said to me was particularly nasty.

And to those who feel the need to comment, I assume your friends are adults and capable of dealing with temperatures or asking you if they can borrow something?

I am so glad that my friends aren't crass enough to judge what I'm wearing and comment

Ive put on loads of weight from a leg injury and I am so insecure. I've been wearing a lot of long loose scarves with everything ( which probably do nothing but whatever I feel covered. ) My partner keeps asking me why I'm wearing a scarf when it's so warm I don't want to say because I am so fat right now, I'm also wearing a lot of long sleeves too, ahh hopefully next summer will be different

I saw someone in town just now wearing a full hooded fleece onesie, and I thought bloody hell they must be roasting! However I'd never actually say anything to them! I think unless it was someone in my immediate family or my best friend (and I'd say it to them in a jokey manner because all we do is rip the piss out of each other!) I'd not say anything. Not my business what other people wear or don't wear.

I don't notice what people wear, generally. And if i did, I wouldn't comment on it. None of my business, any more than it's their business what I wear. I assume if one of us was uncomfortable we would either mention it or suck it up

On the school run in an average day in May, I will see everything from a down jacket and boots to a vest top, shorts and flip-flops. Seriously.

Some people love summer clothes, some love winter clothes. Spring and autumn is overlap so anything goes.

If I saw someone wearing a duffle coat on the hottest day of the year (in fact I have seen that, come to think of it!) it would register that they must be hot but I'd think nothing more of it.

People should wear what they are comfortable with. Sometimes being too hot is preferable to baring legs or whatever.

I cover my legs almost all the time. I don't have scars, I just feel vulnerable without cover and I am always worrying about feeling too cold as i am very sensitive to the slightest breeze or chill. (Adjusts 100denier tights).