To have 'humiliated' my MIL

[ImALurkerNotAFighter]

MIL has an awful tendency to do 'penis portions'. I'd avoided staying with her for a few years, as when breastfeeding she'd served up a tiny inadequate meal, then told me she hadn't done a plate for DS as 'he could just have some of mine' This was on top of sly little digs about my weight.
So MIL wanted us to stay this weekend so she could spend time with the DC. DH usually goes alone but apparently as I'm free this weekend it would be rude for me not to come. They very kindly babysat the asleep DC while we went to the pub. This morning MIL does breakfast for us and SIL and BIL. I get 1 small sausage, 1 half piece of bacon, 1 egg and a small slice of dry toast. MIL and SIL have similar. DH, FIL and BIL get 3 large sausages, 2 bacon, 2 eggs, beans and black pudding. I asked MIL if there was any more, she looked shocked and said no.
I was very cross at this point and walked round the table, took half the sausage, black pudding and beans off a very quiet DH to even it up (we were both left with pretty equal quantities) and sat back down.
MIL feels I have humiliated her, and 'at your size you clearly don't realise that was a proper breakfast '. I'm a size 18, so yes, fat.
I'm fuming and want to leave now. DH wants to stay and take them out for lunch as planned.
I know there are mumsnetters out there who believe the wimminz should subsist on a lettuce leaf and a sniff of meat, but sensible people of mumsnet WIBU? AIBU to pack the DC and leave?

Or if shed still sit there with Half a potato and a teaspoon of meat

Only read mainly the OPs posts, can't be bothered to read all the bickering that has got sod all to do with the actual issues of the OP, which is the MIL being a sexist twat, being rude about someone else's weight and a DH who sits there and lets his mother treat his wife this way.

YANBU OP, I'd have made it clear they were not getting lunch off us, but expect you did go.

I'm a size 10 and pretty slim and I would eat 2 big sausages, 5/6 rashers of bacon and beans and maybe a piece of toast. Although that would keep me going until late afternoon. That size breakfast MIL served is woefully shite.

MiL was not a sexist twat, men and women have different calorific needs it's a fact. Or are you one of those that think men and women are the exact same so it's OK for Trans people to take part in women's sports because men and women have no differences.

Men need more calories it's biology not sexism.

Groan. There's always one who has to bring trans issues into a thread about sausages.

What four times more? Each meal?

That breakfast would be ok if served in a roll as a snack. But not as a full blown weekend breakfast.

And why do those extra calories have to be at the expense of everyone else.

Navy's point of view reminds me of a time where I travelled 200 miles to a friend's house for "Sunday Lunch".

They served soup, that was it, nothing else. Now, although that is technically a lunch and nutritionally probably within calorific range of lunch, you and I both know that is bullshit. I was pissed right off.

If you're expecting Fried Breakfast at someone else's house, you expect more than half a piece of bacon. The breakfast in my local cafe described as Mini Breakfast is a half piece of bacon and a cupful of beans more than the breakfast the OP was served. I'm 5'4" and size 8, I could eat three of those.

The MIL sounds very passive aggressive. Would have been hurt by this if I was in that position. Looks like the control of food is her "thing". With mine it is photographs, and the leaving people out of them. Bad MIL's all have their "thing".

Transactivism on a mil breakfast thread. Excellent.

Out of interest what do people class as a weekend fry up? If I have anyone staying over I normally make links, square sausage, black pudding, haggis or fruit pudding, bacon, eggs, potato scones or fried bread, beans, and fried bubble and squeak, mushrooms, tomatoes and toast.

It was rude but you said you got a small sausage & the men got big sausages. Did she actually have a different variety of sausage for you?

Transactivism on a mil breakfast thread. Excellent.

Not only taht but whilst they were eating some bastard parked across the drive and blocked them in with the MiL!

I'm impressed your mil even made you breakfast! I have to get my own when we stay at the ILs. I'm usually starving as well as she usually (deliberately) makes stuff I don't like. I solved it by bringing my own food and cooking it!

I couldn't get het up over some sausages and bacon. It's your DMIL's choice how she plates up in her house. She wasn't singling you out. Traditionally HVs and GPs would advise that women need less calories. Your MIL has obviously absorbed that lesson. It's one meal, she was hardly starving you.

A good fry up for me is 3 or 4 rashers of bacon, egg of some variety (one fried or a scoop of scrambled), some toast or ideally fried bread, a couple of hash browns or oat cakes. Yum. Don't need sausages, beans, black pudding etc.

I have read your posts actually and your repeatedly say that this breakfast is adequate. What planet you on?

It is an ongoing thing Gwen.

I am really hungry now

That's what I said, yes?

But for me and others on this thread it would have been enough.

That's hardly the point, is it?

I rtft and you said it more than once, because I felt it was unreasonable. I don't know how to "show you" beyond scrolling back for 25 pages which I am not prepared to do, sorry. Not for someone who thinks half a bacon is ok, you do don't you? I don't know why you're fixated on repeatedly, is that your POV or not?

I'm kind of amazed that people feel it's acceptable to tell grown adults what to eat.

Op, you may find this article reassuring/ useful for surviving future dining with in laws.

To quote:

"So, here’s the thing: whether or not you are fat, you are the only person who gets to decide what food goes in your mouth, what tastes good, and how much of it makes you feel full and satisfied. No matter how many busybodies and dietary conspiracy theorists get in your face, you are still the only one who can decide."

www.fatnutritionist.com/index.php/the-inevitable-holiday-post/

I would probably have (loudly) asked my husband if he would mind sharing his plate with me rather than taking it (even if he was pre warned). I like making people actually participate rather than silently sit by and not back me up.

My mother subverted some of her mothers food issues by bringing in snacks for us. My grandmother would never have commented on children's intake so it was acceptable. An option in future is to bring additional snacks. I would enjoy eating them in front of her :)

I'm a size 12, and that is not a good enough amount of food for me. But it's not about size. Bigger people don't 'deserve' less food. Male or female people may eat more. We are all quite different in how our bodies process food and as adults, we get to make those decisions ourselves. I mean what happened to just asking your guests how much they'd like, and allowing people to have preferences? Yanbu (mostly, I understand the taking off plate but that's possibly a detrimental move in this silly game!)