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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to put Bonjela on my fanjo? *warning - bit sporny*

318 replies

Laiste · 02/05/2017 14:33

in order to numb this (small pea sized) lump enough to lance and squeeze the bugger!

Tried yesterday and it was so eye wateringly painful but i only got a bit of clear watery stuff out. There's obviously more to it.

I think it's a great idea! Bonjela's ok in the mouth so it'll be ok down there yes?

OP posts:
DoItTooJulia · 02/05/2017 19:54

Amateur. Anbesol is our numbing agent of choice. But maybe not for a fanjo.....unless....you do seem like a brave kind of woman...

DontFeedTheTrolls · 02/05/2017 19:54

Don't think I've ever hit refresh so often on a thread. OP do we need to send help? 🌋😷🚑

BillyButtfuck · 02/05/2017 19:54

Maybe she's on the way to the fanny doctor

NewZ · 02/05/2017 19:54

Sheesh...we were all so excited we forgot to sound the KLAXON??!!!!!

TheGoodWife16 · 02/05/2017 19:55

Oh, the suspense... it's probably more likely that, just as she went to 'do the deed' and stab the offending area, DH barged in with some promising mortgage quotes, so she's been distracted with Halifax/Nationwide/etc, etc but can't update us!

AntiGrinch · 02/05/2017 19:55

Someone needs to contact MNHQ to trace the IP address and send an ambulance

SarcasmMode · 02/05/2017 19:56

Fuck you're braver than me - that would sting!

I'd just bathe in some Epsom salts and does up on lidocaine down there.

SauvignonBlanche · 02/05/2017 19:57

My dinner's burning!

Muskey · 02/05/2017 19:58

I hope op is not a sporn troll who winds people up with tales of pus and then leaves the thread

AntiGrinch · 02/05/2017 19:58

When I was about 5 months pregnant, I shaved a bit and got into my cozzie for aqua aerobics. It turns out that people with lowered immune systems shouldn't bathe shaved skin in a germy lukewarm soup. I got a vile infection and had to get anti-bs and wear men's boxers for weeks to stop knicker line digging into it. It smelt bad too.

(Just sharing a knicker-area pus story to keep the OP and some others on this thread company)

TheGoodWife16 · 02/05/2017 19:59

I think she's safe with DH in the house - hopefully he'd respond to the thud as she lands on the floor in shock and issue suitable first aid. Whether she told him what her plans were post bath is another matter. Not sure I'd confess to my DH....

Rossigigi · 02/05/2017 20:00

Come on OP we're waiting......

NewZ · 02/05/2017 20:00

I also think the mortgage figures have gotten in the way.

BillyButtfuck · 02/05/2017 20:00
Angry
TheGoodWife16 · 02/05/2017 20:00

Ew, Grinch that sounds horrendous 😮

NewZ · 02/05/2017 20:01

Sigh.

Guess I'll have to interact with the family for a bit....

blowawayblonde · 02/05/2017 20:01

You all watch the drpimplepopper videos on Instagram/ YouTube, right?

HopefullyAnonymous · 02/05/2017 20:01

I'm finding this thread oddly satisfying. What is wrong with me!

Doublemint · 02/05/2017 20:02

No way muskey - sporn troll are a thing?!?

Not placemarking at all, obvs.

OP WHERE ARE YOU?

Supermagicsmile · 02/05/2017 20:02

How did it go?

Patriciathestripper1 · 02/05/2017 20:03

Sudocream before, during and after.

NewZ · 02/05/2017 20:05

I meant to say that my DS2 just might have inherited the sporny gene.... he's had a blackhead on his nose for ages that he let me have a go at today.... but insisted I do it in front of the mirror so he could watch. He's 6.

KreamyKoala · 02/05/2017 20:06

I should imagine sporn on lady bits is an actual thing for some men

Rossigigi · 02/05/2017 20:07

I've found my people that's for sure hands around chocolates to everyone

Muskey · 02/05/2017 20:08

Stranger things than that happen on mumsnet doublemint for eg a whole load of women (possibly men) are waiting to find out what a complete stranger did with a spot on her vjojo