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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Nose job booked for tomorrow. AIBU to not go?

161 replies

Freddiethefrogity · 25/04/2017 22:05

Name changed.

I have a large nose. It's not huge but unsightly and affects the way my face looks. I've never been called ugly but I felt I would feel so much more confident without it.

I went for my consultation and discussed what I wanted. The cosmetic surgeon made some plans for me and I agreed to the procedure.

However, today I went for my pre-op appointment and the two receptionists stopped me to say they've never said this before but they genuinely thought my nose was absolutely fine and they had no idea why I was changing it.

They seemed very genuine.

Now I've got doubts about having the procedure tomorrow.

I don't hate my looks at all. It's literally just my nose. I don't have low self esteem. But maybe I'm wrong.

I know you can let me know if my nose is awful as you haven't seen it, but do you think the receptionists say that to everyone? AIBU to reconsider on the basis of their opinions?

Very random thread I know Grin

OP posts:
Summer23 · 25/04/2017 22:42

You don't need a nose job. You're beautiful as you are. If I were you I'd be worried I'd end up with a pinched looking one. Honestly, you look great. Spend the money on a treat.

DancingLedge · 25/04/2017 22:42

All other doctors have refused
Two unknown people have made you doubt going ahead
And they're people used to seeing noses that do need work

And we all think your nose is fine.

How does postponing until you have no doubts feel?
I would strongly urge you to postpone for several months.

That leaves the option open..

What if this is the only doctor who will operate is because he cares more about the fee than about your future?
How much research have you done on him?

But, MOST OF ALL, YOU'RE UNSURE, UNSURE ENOUGH TO ASK STRANGERS, SO POSTPONE.

GardenGeek · 25/04/2017 22:43

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SingaSong12 · 25/04/2017 22:43

You look fine. If the views of strangers are swaying you then you should definitely at least initially postpone or just cancel.
Were the other surgeons refusing because they didn't think you needed it or was there something else?
No surgery is completely risk free either whether you will like your looks after or the low risks of any anaesthetic. Don't go ahead if you have real doubts.

Derlei · 25/04/2017 22:43

I have had 2 nose jobs ( the second being a revision to fix the first one)

I would say don't do it. If you are looking for refinement, there's a reason you can only find one surgeon to do it and that's because it's ridiculously difficult to achieve significant results. (I did a ton of research). You will find that swelling will be around for so long that for quite a while your nose will look fatter and you will wonder why you went ahead with it. If you have a bump or a hook from side view then I would say go for it, but if it's just for tip refinement and to look thinner, it's very very difficult. In fact I came across many patients who travelled to America to achieve this, as the actual procedure was very difficult. It involves building the bridge up (with rib or ear) and increasing the projection of your nose to make it appear more thinner thus refined

Itshellofromme · 25/04/2017 22:44

Didnt you do one of those, how old am I threads? I am wondering why it's important to you to get validations from people based on your looks. You are absolutely lovely as everyone is telling you.

FurryLittleTwerp · 25/04/2017 22:44

As to whether the receptionists say that to everyone, I suspect they don't!

They may well get an annual bonus based on profits / number of procedures done. They will not have medical or nursing qualifications, but will have seen an awful lot of before & after customers. They will not have any sort of axe to grind.

Goldfishjane · 25/04/2017 22:44

This is a stealth boast for being stunning surely?
Why would you put that beautiful face near a knife?
No no no no no
bangs gavel

Ihatethedailymail1 · 25/04/2017 22:44

Don't do it! You are very pretty as you are. Don't change yourself to be a clone of other people who society perceives as "better". You honestly have no feature that I would like at twice and think oh, ugly, or large, or needs work....! Honestly, be confident in yourself as you are a striking looking woman.

namechange20050 · 25/04/2017 22:45

Op I've had rhinoplasty. I had hated my nose and considered a nose job for 12 years before i had it done. Two people saying to me that my nose was fine would have meant nothing to me. I was determined to do it & 100% about it. If you're not sure, don't do it. You can't go back. If you have any questions, ask away.

WorraLiberty · 25/04/2017 22:46

OMG don't do it OP

You and your nose look absolutely lovely.

And think about it. The receptionists must have meant every word, because if they 'just said that to everyone', they'd be out of a job wouldn't they?

EnriqueTheRingBearingLizard · 25/04/2017 22:46

Other Doctors have all refused and this is the only one willing to do the operation, then the receptionists try to put you off. Do you wonder if they're trying to tell you something?

Sara107 · 25/04/2017 22:47

I think you're pretty, with nice bone structure and your nose fits your face.

Original poster
Freddiethefrogity · 25/04/2017 22:47

The thing is, people are going to be nice. It doesn't mean they actual think the things they say.

I'm going to see how I feel tomorrow morning. I think it's too late to cancel now anyway without losing all the fees for the procedure so I feel I may as well go for it.

I'm having the end smoother, the plateau rounded and the end smoothed too. It should make all the difference.

OP posts:
KrayKray00 · 25/04/2017 22:48

Have you already paid any money for you op OP? I had to pay a large initial deposit to secure my op date (different procedure) also you say you're booked in tomorrow so I take it you haven't cancelled it yet so if you aren't worried about losing your deposit then that's great but I'd consider if you do change your mind in the future and decide to go back to the same surgeon/clinic/hospital if they would take you on again (if a large cost is involved in sure they would though)...

Also it's worrying you say no one has agreed to the op before so why has this one surgeon is he the real deal or just someone who has agreed did the others say no because your nose is fine or other issues??

It is all good and well people saying you looking great and your nose is fine but you aren't getting it done for them it is something you are doing for you

And yes for what it is worth I like your nose, it suits you face. Spend the money on a holiday instead Wink

DisneyMillie · 25/04/2017 22:48

You look lovely as you are - I wouldn't personally risk it as you see so many bad surgery cases.

But only you know how you'll feel if you don't - could you maybe have some counselling first to see if it's really your nose bothering you or if that's a symptom of some other unhappiness.

sheldonesque · 25/04/2017 22:49

You are striking. I say this for I am a pig in knickers and can see so much beauty in others. The first thing I saw were your eyes.

I think your nose is fine. If you are determined to have a tweak then that is fine too ...

BUT if you have any doubts then don't do it tomorrow. It can be done when you are sure.

Agoddessonamountaintop · 25/04/2017 22:49

Your face is not the slightest bit 'harsh' - in fact, it looks like the perfect oval with wide-set eyes and full lips. I can't see what difference altering your nose would make.

VanessaBet · 25/04/2017 22:50

God, you're gorgeous, honestly. You should see my nose! Just kind of flat and boneless, no idea how they'd correct mine! Honestly, with your big eyes and lovely lips you don't want a teeny dainty nose (not that yours is big) - look what Kim K has done to hers, it's too small for her face now and there's loads of space between the bottom of her nose and her lips.

But it must be your decision, I know I don't believe my husband when he says my nose is cute (and useful in a survival situation involving being stuck in a very tight place apparently - I can flatten it right down!)

Original poster
Freddiethefrogity · 25/04/2017 22:51

The other doctors all said a similar thing. My nose could be improved so that it technically is a more attractive nose, but they didn't think it would improve my appearance to do so.

OP posts:
wetcardboard · 25/04/2017 22:52

Looking at your picture, you definitely shouldn't get a nose job!

Your nose is in proportion to the rest your features, and matches your jaw and lips. If you make it smaller it's going to throw everything else off balance.

Original poster
Freddiethefrogity · 25/04/2017 22:53

Thanks everyone. I've asked for the photo to be removed now.

I just wanted honest opinions.

It's a shame there's no way to see what my nose will look like in reality before going for the op. Obviously I've seen digital images but it's not the same as what it will look like in pics.

I'm not sure I could be truly happy with my nose the way it is. I feel it looks unrefined.

I will sleep on it and decide.

I've currently paid a deposit but not the full fees.

OP posts:
Chocolou · 25/04/2017 22:53

You really are beautiful. Don't do it surely the receptionists comment and no other surgeon willing to do it should speak volumes.

Beautiful beautiful lady. Love your lips!!

MingeFog · 25/04/2017 22:53

I spent £1500 having braces to straighten my top teeth. My brother sitll maintains it was a waste of money, but my confidence has shot through the roof - I've been told by several people (without prompting!) that my teeth are "perfect", and a couple have even asked if I have veneers. I took that as a compliment, because having them look so perfect that they look fake, is more positive than negative to me!

I would say go for it - it may be a small difference to others, but if you have spent years fretting about your nose (like I did with my teeth), even if the overall effect is quite subtle, it makes the world of difference to how you feel about yourself.

FeedTheSharkAndItWIllBite · 25/04/2017 22:54

I've been trying for years to get the shape changed but doctors have all refused. This was the only doctor willing to do it.

Don't do it. Don't

Also, I agree with a pp's comment. That sounds like a warning to me personally. it's possible that they know why other doctors refused/that this one won't do a good job.

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