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AIBU?

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Original poster

To be utterly disgusted and depressed that women think its ok to make small penis gags?

532 replies

deffonamechange · 22/04/2017 18:16

Just been reading a thread further down where yes some scumbag bloke had been horrible to someone. Lots of outrage and tell him he has a small dick, tell him he has a micro penis basically mock the size of his genitals.

Can you imagine if a woman upset a bloke and all his mates said tell her she has awful labia, tell her her fanny is horrible, tell her she doesnt look normal down there
Its horrific!!

Do you know how many lovely men with smaller penises get inundated with this? Do you know how many teenage boys worry themselves to death because of comments like these?

Its depressing/sexist/cruel and plain nasty. You should be ashamed of yourselves!

OP posts:
MerchantofVenice · 22/04/2017 21:56

*but NOT necessarily (yet) on this one

Wedrine4me · 22/04/2017 22:02

And some of those nice men might have a small penis. And they might be full of insecurities because of what they hear flippantly being bandied around as the biggest insult possible. Wouldn't you feel bad colluding in this? That young men grow up with low self esteem and confidence because a lot of people think it's ok to do this "because women have taken crap like this forever".

Why not accept that personal insults full stop is not the way to right the wrongs of generations. Be they to men or women?
I would and have taken my children to task over all comments that could affect people as a group in-adversely even if there no obvious victim nearby. Please don't dress this up as a feminist issue, its a treating ALL people with respect issue and not feeding anything that can affect anybodies self esteem.

itsmine · 22/04/2017 22:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BertrandRussell · 22/04/2017 22:09

Itsmine, why are you so selective in the posters you respond to?

zzzzz · 22/04/2017 22:11

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

MerchantofVenice · 22/04/2017 22:11

*Wouldn't you feel bad colluding in this? That young men grow up with low self esteem and confidence because a lot of people think it's ok to do this "because women have taken crap like this forever".

Why not accept that personal insults full stop is not the way to right the wrongs of generations. Be they to men or women?*

Personally, I would feel bad colluding in anything that made someone feel bad about their body just because you fancy having a pop at them. It's very much NOT 'ok to do this because women have taken this crap forever.' I certainly haven't said this, but perhaps someone else has and I missed it?

I did suggest that it might be kind of understandable in the case of the asshat who send that poisonous email to his wife's friend. Not morally commendable... but sort of ok.

Please don't dress this up as a feminist issue,

Again, let's go back to the OP, who did raise a feminist issue, I feel, because OP used as her starting point a specific thread in which the male protagonist had been a sexist pig. So the (ill-judged, yes) 'small dick' comments in question were a sort of knee-jerk reaction to a feminist issue (the issue of women's bodies existing to please men).

It was only a little later that OP revealed that she had a different reason for starting the thread.

MerchantofVenice · 22/04/2017 22:11

(bold fail in first two paragraphs)

ohcraptoday · 22/04/2017 22:14

Whilst I agree. I also have to say that vaginas aren't exactly pretty to look at either. Grin

MerchantofVenice · 22/04/2017 22:14

you seem very measured merchant

Yessssss!!

There's a first time for everything, I guess Grin

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 22/04/2017 22:17

I was just referring to a certain vibe that I don't like... the desperate need to hunt out potentially unfair behaviour from women on grounds of sex, blow it wildly out of proportion, and use it to try and undermine feminism as a whole

A bit like the certain vibe that thinks shouting "handmaiden" is a trump card to undermine another view point.

Your "orgasm" comment was much the same , although you now seem to be back pedalling on it.

Wedrine4me · 22/04/2017 22:17

I did suggest that it might be kind of understandable in the case of the asshat who send that poisonous email to his wife's friend. Not morally commendable... but sort of ok.

But my argument is that it's not only that asshat that will absorb that insult. It's the "nice men" that you know with a small penis that will be affected much more badly by that message to the asshat - therefore it sort of isn't ok.

nolongersurprised · 22/04/2017 22:20

In my wild youth I encountered many penises and very very small penises seemed more common than you'd think. The owners of them were universally the ones who were critical and mean about my body. Even as a young woman I knew it was projection.

BurnTheBlackSuit · 22/04/2017 22:20

I did suggest that it might be kind of understandable in the case of the asshat who send that poisonous email to his wife's friend. Not morally commendable... but sort of ok.

Why was it ok? Would it be ok if she had retaliated by calling him a retard or a mongie instead?

MerchantofVenice · 22/04/2017 22:26

A bit like the certain vibe that thinks shouting "handmaiden" is a trump card to undermine another view point.

Your "orgasm" comment was much the same , although you now seem to be back pedalling on it.

This is unfair.

Firstly, I have never used the term handmaiden in any MN discussion. So you can't lay that at my door, sorry.

Secondly, I am very much NOT backpedalling on the orgasm comment. I'll explain again, since you missed it. There is a certain kind of individual (in life - possibly on this thread, but not obviously so) who just revels in/jumps for joy/has noisy orgasms every time they think they have cleverly undermined or caught out feminists. Most often (for obvious reasons) men. Sometimes women. The sex of the orgasmer is totally irrelevant. It's the sentiment I'm taking issue with.

MerchantofVenice · 22/04/2017 22:30

Why was it ok? Would it be ok if she had retaliated by calling him a retard or a mongie instead?

It was only 'sort of' ok - say, if they woman in question had emailed it to the asshat in question. So there he'd be, thinking he's god's gift etc, firing off emails to women in which he reveals his arrogance about the status of his opinion... lo and behold, he gets a serious put-down in return. Private email - so all the other men don't get to see and consequently worry - but he sees that she regards his attraction to her, and therefore his dick-centric thinking - as small and insignificant. And no other men are harmed

But, yes, as a general insult, bandied around willy-nilly (as it were), it's not ok.

itsmine · 22/04/2017 22:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Greggers2017 · 22/04/2017 22:32

It's not the size of the vessel that matters it's the motion in the ocean

MerchantofVenice · 22/04/2017 22:33

Oh - regards the 'mongie' comment (wtf?) - I don't think that's a decent analogy.

The small dick comment (whilst, let me reiterate, unacceptable) is usually an attempt to undermine a macho attitude - to sort of 'cut someone down to size'. It has relevance, even if it's an unacceptable comment.

'Mongie' or 'retard' is just plain wrong, in every context. No extenuating circumstances. Ever.

itsmine · 22/04/2017 22:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BurnTheBlackSuit · 22/04/2017 22:35

I didn't read the thread in question. But I think using a disability to insult some is wrong, even if the person hasn't got that disability and even if the insult is private and those with the disability don't get to hear about it.

It's as wrong to say someone has a micro penis as to call someone a spastic.

Feminism is a red herring in all of this.

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 22/04/2017 22:42

Firstly, I have never used the term handmaiden in any MN discussion. So you can't lay that at my door, sorry

And where did I do that? You referred to a "certain vibe" which appears. I merely pointed out the equally nasty and misogynistic vibe which often appears in the "handmaiden " put down.

Your explanation of your orgasm comment as an equal opportunities is noted although I still think it is no better than , as someone pointed out accusing posters of "frothing" or " being hysterical"

itsmine · 22/04/2017 22:42

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Wedrine4me · 22/04/2017 22:43

Well I just feel very sorry for the boys/men like the ops son who have to live with the consequences of this type of insult, just as I feel very sorry for girls/women such as my niece who is growing up feeling very insecure and unconfident because of the comments about her flat chest.
The op raised the subject because it's close to home for her. Just because she raised the subject in general didn't make it a feminist issue. I suspect that each and every comment re penis insults she read on that particular thread cut a little deeper on behalf of her ds who has to live with the consequences of comments such as this on his self esteem.
Well done valentine who, due to this thread, has realised the impact that throw away insults can have on actual people with those physical traits. Whilst it is a perceived insult to many men, it is an actual insult to those with a small penis. Just as throw away insults affect some women more than others if it they relate it to themselves.

BeMorePanda · 22/04/2017 22:45

I agree op, it's really not on.

As an aside I had one of the most orgasmic nights of my life with a man who had a micro penis. One night stand in a European city - someone I met online in the early days of the Internet. I was very surprised at the unveiling - but omg what a night. Whew!

Whizbang · 22/04/2017 22:51

YANBU at all OP.

All those who make such comments are thoughtless and spiteful. That is all.

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