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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think she should have informed me her kids are unvaccinated?

420 replies

InMemoryOfSleep · 20/04/2017 08:24

I went to antenatal yoga with a lovely teacher, who then visited my house with her two children once my baby was born. I also attended her baby group several times with my DS, and her children were also present.

I've just found out that she's an anti-vaxxer, and I cannot stop thinking about the fact that she exposed my tiny baby to her unvaccinated kids, without my knowledge! AIBU to think she should have informed me before bringing her kids to my house, knowing my baby was too young to have been vaccinated yet?

And what about all the babies at the group - I get that it's her personal choice to not vaccinate (though I am vehemently against it) but as she is acting in a professional capacity surely she should be informing parents that her unvaccinated children will be there? I certainly would have thought twice about taking my DS before his vaccinations.

OP posts:
angelinheaven · 20/04/2017 10:07

These dc aren't germ bags, they are not vaccinated against disease if they catch them, what happens in hospitals when you have just given birth, is there a sign saying do not enter this ward unless you have just been vaccinated. And as for op that say they they don't want there dc around other dc that haven't been vaccinated at school, do you ask if every child has been vaccinated. I wonder if my dd best friends mum knows that my dd is up to date with her injections, these children do not carry all the disease and pass them onto every dc they come into contact with,
And injections aren't always good, they made my dc really ill.
Maybe a lot of you should have a good read up on things !!!

StealthPolarBear · 20/04/2017 10:08

Strawberry no not 100% but much better than nothing. Youre assuming all risks are at the same level.

Iflyaway · 20/04/2017 10:10

But because of herd immunity, the chance of an unvaccinated person encountering those viruses is remote.

But Italy and Romania are experiencing an upsurge of measles because of the anti-vax movement....

www.theguardian.com/world/2017/apr/19/italy-measles-epidemic-vaccinations

drspouse · 20/04/2017 10:11

I read a thread about an anti vaxxing yoga teacher a few months back. Wonder if it's the same woman or there's a load of yoga teachers not vaccinating their kids?

I know of one in my area - I've posted on many other threads that I'm in the NW of England so that's not a big revelation from my part - don't know if the OP is in the same area but it wouldn't be massively surprising if there were others around TBH.

I found out through another route (after my own DCs were fully vaccinated) and the DCs have not had even the 5 in 1 which is something I'd not come across before - I'd come across a lot of children/young adults who hadn't had MMR, but had other jabs.

I agree this is selfish and she should not be knowingly exposing pregnant women and new babies to her unvaccinated children. I have no idea if your yoga teacher (or our local yoga teacher) has been vaccinated themselves but if they were working in this role in the NHS (e.g. antenatal teacher, health visitor) they would have to be up to date on their vaccinations themselves. So they should at the very least be disclosing that they (if relevant) and their children aren't.

I'd also go so far as to say that there should be an obligation to reveal the children's vaccination status to school and a right of the school to disclose that to families whose DCs can't get vaccinations for health reasons.

StealthPolarBear · 20/04/2017 10:11

I'm sorry your dc were ill. It's not us who needs to have "a good read" though

muckypup73 · 20/04/2017 10:11

Apparently measles is rife at the moment too and it is a killer

Edsheeranalbumparty · 20/04/2017 10:11

Some people are missing the point here. It's not that the OP feels that she needs to stop her baby coming into contact with anyone just in case they are unvaccinated, but that this yoga teacher makes her living from being around pregnant women and newborn babies, and has her own unvaccinated kids have a a lot of contact as well, and therefore perhaps should inform them that her kids haven't had any vaccinations.

I guess though as PPs say, the reason she hasn't had her kids vaccinated is that she doesn't feel it's necessary so she wouldn't think it necessary to warn others either. Ridiculous and stupid, but that's the way she feels........

InMemoryOfSleep · 20/04/2017 10:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

bumbleymummy · 20/04/2017 10:14

SPB, the TB vaccine is only selectively offered now and isn't as effective against pulmonary TB. A new vaccine is being developed.

Original poster
InMemoryOfSleep · 20/04/2017 10:14

@StrawberryJelly00 so by your reasoning don't bother vaccinating?! It's about risk reduction, my child is much less likely to infect hers as he has been vaccinated, whereas her children have not been vaccinated and are therefore much more likely to contract a disease and infect others.

OP posts:
SLLM · 20/04/2017 10:15

I also wasn't vaccinated against a lot of them, I in the past have worked with kids. Does this mean I shouldn't be allowed to? What about my newborn baby can I not be around her now?

bumbleymummy · 20/04/2017 10:15

Muckypup, the measles vaccine isn't given until 12 months.

StealthPolarBear · 20/04/2017 10:16

Yes good point bumble. TB rates are huge in sone areas though and used to be almost gone in this country

Trifleorbust · 20/04/2017 10:16

Your responsibility to ask if you care that much. She is under no obligation to tell you. You are being ridiculously unreasonable.

StealthPolarBear · 20/04/2017 10:16

Op people do not understand risk. Any risk > 0 are all the same and risk reduction is pointless unless it's reduced to zero.

Disastronaut · 20/04/2017 10:18

I'm pretty sure the OP is aware that her newborn's going to come into contact with un-vaxxed people - on the bus, at the clinic, there's nothing we can do.

But as she says, this is completely different. Yoga-woman knowingly brought her kids into contact with her, and apparently does so all the time. This is an entirely avoidable risk. But OP wasn't given the opportunity to avoid it because of this woman's selfishness/stupidity/whatever.

I'd want to warn her clients & would be happy to trash her business in order to do so.

drspouse · 20/04/2017 10:18

@SLLM well that is YOUR baby so your choice to potentially expose her to deadly diseases.
I would argue that if you cannot be vaccinated, you should be obligated to inform any parents who request the information (but through necessity e.g. immune compromised child, not nosiness).
If you just decided not to be, then I would not be happy with you working with children and I think it should be obligatory for children's workforce workers to have up to date vaccines as far as they are able.

MaisyPops · 20/04/2017 10:21

Same drspouse
People can take whatever choices with their own children, even if I don't like those choices.
But the second you start working with other people's children and pregnant ladies you should be expected to be vaccinated unless you have a medical reason not to be.

bumbleymummy · 20/04/2017 10:26

Yes SPB, it's quite worrying given the increase in antibiotic resistance 😕 Hopefully they'll come up with something soon.

Disastronaut · 20/04/2017 10:27

Actually SSLM I would support a legal requirement for anyone working with babies & young children to be fully vaccinated. I think it should be a routine thing, like checking for convictions etc.

usernumbernine · 20/04/2017 10:28

Disas. So what if that person can't be vaccinated for medical reasons? They can't be a teacher or work in a nursery ?

prh47bridge · 20/04/2017 10:28

Haven't read the full thread. However, I think you are being unreasonable.

Your baby initially has what is known as passive immunity. This comes from antibodies received from you during the last 3 months before birth. If you breastfed that immunity lasts longer. The first vaccination at 2 months covers those conditions for which immunity decreases fastest. Immunity to measles, mumps and rubella lasts for up to a year which is why the MMR jab is given just after your baby's first birthday.

The fact that a child is unvaccinated does not mean they are carrying any diseases. Even if they are, your child is adequately protected.

I think this woman is being stupid in not vaccinating her own children. If too many parents follow her example we will lose herd immunity. But I don't think she needs to tell people that her children have not been vaccinated.

SuckItUpSnowflake · 20/04/2017 10:29

What is so hard for people to understand about in a professional capacity and just going around living life?!?

Of course YANBU.

peggyundercrackers · 20/04/2017 10:31

Yoga-woman knowingly brought her kids into contact with her, and apparently does so all the time. This is an entirely avoidable risk

but the risk is the same on the bus, in a shop, nursery, walking through a shopping centre - virus's are in the air all the time - they don't care if they are in a house.

Disastronaut · 20/04/2017 10:32

Usernine yeah, I know, and I've been thinking about that. I think vaccination is crucial but obviously I appreciate that people have medically valid reasons. I don't want them to be discriminated against for something that's out of their hands.

I guess exemption for that (small) number of people would still allow an overall risk reduction.