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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU with my friends?

999 replies

PhyllisNights · 19/04/2017 21:24

I'm the first one in my social group to get pregnant. I talk to my friends on a daily basis through WhatsApp and see them all in person at least once a week.

As it's my first pregnancy, I'm very excited. I can't stop talking about it. I'm so lucky, so happy, so fortunate & so privileged. My baby feels so special, like I know my baby will do something incredible in this world - I can feel it!!

And yet, my friends have started to turn on me. They've become very jealous. They make snide remarks, they mimick me & give me side eye. I feel like my pregnancy is the butt of all the jokes.

I can't help that I've been so blessed and so fortunate to get pregnant out of my friends first. I went to college, uni, started a professional career first & got married first. I've just always been up step ahead - I can't help it!!

Would it be unreasonable to sit my friends down and ask them to stop being so negative? I want to ask them to support me better and help me out.

OP posts:
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9
WildIrishRose1 · 20/04/2017 00:27

😂😂😂

chastenedButStillSmiling · 20/04/2017 00:28

OP, if you're real (I suspect you're not) then go to bed.... at this time of night AIBU can be less than kind. From around 4 am the mums with the DCs who wake early will be up and on line, and as they'll generally have younger ones, you might find them more on your side.
You might find there's a different tone during the day. You might not.

From me, I'd say that I say to pregnant people that having a baby is like walking through a door. People who don't have kids haven't walked through that door, and they don't know what it looks like once they walk through it. YOU haven't walked through it yet, but you're anticipating it. Once you've walked through that door, you're probably going to feel differently about - almost - everything. But don't put that on the people who haven't walked through that door yet.

You're probably going to feel v v envious of your friends over the next few years, because they'll be doing things you won't be doing. But it'll be ok, because you'll have your baby.
Be kind and thoughtful to each other and your friendships will survive. Don't put your expectations onto them.

And babyshowers are grabby and fake. Don't expect one.

And Smeaton (and others) Wren are shit. 7 kinds of shit. PM me if you want absolute detail. But I do have corian worktops (not from Wren) and they are lush!!!!

Venusflytwat · 20/04/2017 00:28

Loaf I genuinely snorted at #winning #at #life.

How do people DO all those hashtags? That took me ages.

I remember when microwaves first came out and cost nearly £200.

GrumbleBumble · 20/04/2017 00:28

Oh come on folks this is clearly a (not very good) wind up. No-one this self-obsessed, self-centred and frightful could reach the age of 29 and still have any friends (or a "professional job") or a man prepared to actually have sex with her

WildIrishRose1 · 20/04/2017 00:29

No, you're grand, Gaelic.....

GaelicSiog · 20/04/2017 00:30

We need a code word for next time we see our sisters. You're not the one I just tried to palm off on Venus, obviously. You're my favourite sister Wink

PeachPants · 20/04/2017 00:31

OP you're going to change your bio on all social media to 'full time yummy mummy' aren't you? And your middle name on all social media to Phyllis proudmummytoPFB Nights? And post a regular picture with those cards that say '1 week old today's 'first time I haven't shat up my back?

By the way, ice justvincested in a new microwave! But it doesn't rise up. I'm just always that one step behind Sad

WildIrishRose1 · 20/04/2017 00:31

Yeah, you too, Gaelic😁

Venusflytwat · 20/04/2017 00:31

This horse is winning at life.
I couldn't face the hashtags again, sorry.

AIBU with my friends?
PeachPants · 20/04/2017 00:32

I've just invested

Couldn't contain my excitement there, sorry!

chastenedButStillSmiling · 20/04/2017 00:33

Regardless of whether or not it's real, can I come to the babyshower, Venus? Please. I'll bring my own popcorn. And enough # to share

And I'm not pregnant, but I LOOK it, and could talk about it. A lot.
It was only 16 years ago, and I remember it like it was yesterday... walking through to park to work, puking up with morning sickness. Itchy, itchy skin. A REALLY bad back in my last trimester.

Can you not SEE what an amazing guest I'd be. Please invite me to come along (rushes to check the letterbox for invite!)

GaelicSiog · 20/04/2017 00:33

Everyone else on this thread is going to think every Irish couple aims for double figures Grin

WildIrishRose1 · 20/04/2017 00:36

I bet our mums didn't sit around, moaning that their friends weren't paying them enough attention in their pregnancies, though.

Venusflytwat · 20/04/2017 00:38

If it's ok by FeralBeryl it's ok by me.

There's a sentence I never expected to say today 😂

I'm off to bed. In my very ordinary house. Sleep well all. Including you OP. I do hope you're as fake as me, you've given us all a good laugh.

GaelicSiog · 20/04/2017 00:39

Oh, goodness no. I'm number 10, I doubt anyone even sent a card by the time I came along. Their badge of honour isn't the attention, it's the getting on with it.

Crapuccino · 20/04/2017 00:42

Sorry but that horse is properly sexy Venus. It's like "Look how fucking hot I am. Yes. Look at me. Look at this mane, just swirling in the wind like a shampoo advert. Look how glossy I am. Damn right. I am on FIRE."

Venusflytwat · 20/04/2017 00:43

#sexyhorse 😂

Crapuccino · 20/04/2017 00:43

On that bombshell, I think it is bedtime for me too.

Let's see what's left of this thread after the the MNers who come out after dark have had their turn at it.

WildIrishRose1 · 20/04/2017 00:44

Goodnight all, I'm off to have a quick look at the tiger thread, then I'm turning in for the night, to dream of mythical microwaves and magical, sparkly countertops.....💤🐴

SouthWindsWesterly · 20/04/2017 00:44

Oh my, this is most hilar Grin

CuppaTeaTeddy · 20/04/2017 00:45

Fucking hell... I wasn't going to bother with a baby shower but if I get to elect someone to get all the shit together so I can just turn up for presents then I'm up for it.

This whole post is a complete pile of shit 😂

Crispmonster1 · 20/04/2017 00:46

This has to be fake?!

coolaschmoola · 20/04/2017 00:49

Even my DH wasn't overly attentive during my pregnancy... Pesky bloody war getting in the way! My family were in another country too. And I worked on my own - had to get myself locked in the building alone at 5pm on a Friday to get any attention at work.

Had a good kitchen though!

Seriously OP - other people's pregnancies are NOT interesting. Unless you are telling them about the grapes hanging out your arse and the giant varicose vein that has popped up in your nethers.

Although once the baby starts doing it's alien impression and starts making your entire stomach move around like you've swallowed five puppies they will either be interested or appalled by how gross it is.

Congratulations on your pregnancy. Just remember it's YOURS and therefore only really interesting to you.

RedDogsBeg · 20/04/2017 00:53

The way you talk, OP, I am surprised the saviour child you are having wasn't an immaculate conception.

Anyone remember a similar thread recently where the OP was cross because her friends didn't want to talk about her child on a night out?

GinAndTunic · 20/04/2017 09:31

Maybe I need to go and find a local mums group or something?! I can't surround myself with people who refuse to be happy for me.

NOOOOO. OP, don't leave us! I need to hear who you are going to elect to hold your baby shower.

clutches the OP's ankles so she can't escape