I am done with you x

[ChristinaParsons]

Well? Both of us nearly 50, marriages of 20, years grown up children.
Both seperated a long time when we met. Got this message tonight
Said WHAT? Called him twice. No answer. My self respect is done
But why?

Ah I see you were both separated when you met. Sorry.

But are you sure his marriage was really over?

Still don't understand why you give your age and the fact you were married for 20 years before this.

In your OP you said we had both separated a long time when we met
Now your saying you both broke up your marriages to be together

You've been cheating on your husband for 20 years? Wow you deserve everything you get here. No sympathy from me

Both seperated a long time when we met

Did you mention the long marriages OP to show that this man was capable of commitment once?

Had you been in an argument or did he just send that out of the blue? It seems a strange thing for anyone to text on its own without prior messages

In case it helps...

OP has been seeing some for eighteen months.

They are both in their fifties, have had marriages of over 20 years (to other people) and have grown up children. They have both been separated from their respective spouses for a good while. (Think these things have been said to demonstrate 1. A certain degree of maturity is a reasonable expectation 2. It's not an affair, at least as far as OP knows and she was given cause to believe that at the very least)

They haven't been arguing. She got a text saying "I'm done with you x".

No contact since, though she has tried. She is now mystified, confused and distraught.

I thought it was very clear.

She can't give any more info on the text, as she doesn't have it herself. And she doesn't have more background info as they weren't fighting. If there was something bothering him, she was unaware of it.

I hope that's not your real name, OP.

Jesus wept, some of you need to back off and have a little think. Of course she's rambling a bit & not explaining herself terribly well. She's just been dumped by text, by someone she thought she was in a good relationship with, for probably the first time after her marriage of 20 years ended. She's shocked, confused and upset.

Christina. ((((Hug)))). It'll be ok. I know it doesn't seem like it right now, but it will. You found your feet again after your marriage ended and you will again now. Do you have a friend you can call? A bit difficult on long weekends sometimes I know, but hopefully there's someone you can talk to.

He's an utter twat to have done this to you, irrespective of what his issue is. He's a spineless git to have ended it by text and not replied to your messages. If you thought hevwasvgreat, thevrekationship was good & there weren't any issues you must be really confused. What a wanker 😢

🍪 Won't do any harm.

Well,said Annie

Fucking hell. Read what she has written.

Both their marriages had ALREADY ended when they met.

I don't think so, redshoe.

"We both had marriages of 20 years that had ended when we met".

I think she means that they were both single when they met, having previously had a 20 year marriage each. So the marriages ended. They met afterwards.

I agree that it is worded in a way that you could take either way.

The significance of the marriages is that we both came out of them very hurt and both of us were treated badly during our divorces. Neither of us thought we would ever be happy again. But we were, never a cross word. Normal chat all day yesterday. A text at 22:37 saying night x
Then at 22:51 I give up with you x

In your OP you said we had both separated a long time when we met. Now your saying you both broke up your marriages to be together

Where on earth do you get that from, Redshoe? OP said very clearly "We both had marriages of 20 years that had ended when we met".

I don't see how "We both had marriages of 20 years that had ended when we met" is something that could be taken "either way"? Surely there's only one meaning, i.e. that the marriages were over before they met?

Christina. I've just realised what time you posted this, but you say 'tonight'. what time was it where you are when he sent you the message. Where was he without you? Is there any chance he was out with a brother/good mate/one of his kids and it was a jokey text to them at the end of a boozy night and he hasn't replied to you because he's sleeping?

Sorry Op, but did he text 'I give up with you x', or 'I'm done with you x'?

TheSultanofPingu - That's my question, too. OP, you said that you wrote the message out as you received it, so is the second version a mistake on your part, or did he send two messages?

Oh. That sounds like you MIGHT have jumped the gun a bit.

It sounds like he was hoping for a 'Goodnight' from you too but didn't get one & thought you'd fallen asleep or something and was joking about you being asleep already or something?

This morning he might still be sleeping or doing something without his phone nearby.

i think he sent you the text that was for someone else, question is, who?