Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 ··· 5 6 7 ··· 29 30

Original poster

Children watching Peppa Pig on phones in restaurant

740 replies

SilverLeafClover · 12/04/2017 11:01

We went for lunch with friends yesterday at the Fifteen restaurant near Newquay. I only mention the place because it has an amazing view of the beach and the sea, which made it all the more surprising that as soon as we sat down, my friend and her husband handed their children (both NT, aged 4 and 6) two phones. For the duration of the meal, the children sat zombie-like and watched Peppa Pig on the screens.

I will admit, I judged.

The parents did not speak to their children and the children were just glued to the screens. My three children aged 8, 5, 3 are not angels but managed to sit through a short meal (main course and then ice cream, no staters, no coffees) without needing screens. I talked to my adult friends and kept an eye on my children, pointing out stuff that was happening outside, large boats passing by, surfers, dogs etc.

Am I am a Luddite? Or am I right to think unlimited access to screens during a meal out is not right?

OP posts:

lazyparenting101 · 12/04/2017 12:37

YANBU

It all boils down to lazy parenting and taking the easy option to the benefit of the parents and detriment of the child.

I have two nieces aged 5 and 10 who acquired an iPad each about 6months ago. Before when I visited they were excited to see me, and begged me to be involved in their games. Now when I visit I barely get a word out of them as they're 100% fixated with their screens.

But that's ok because the parents have an easy life...

And point proven becuase your friends allowed them to play on these devices in the company of other children? Incredibly rude and anti-social.

carabos · 12/04/2017 12:38

Screens not ideal, but from the perspective of other guests in the restaurant they are far preferable to the running about that a lot of parents allow .

TheRealPooTroll · 12/04/2017 12:39

Not read the whole thread but no doubt you've had a flaming as using screens as dummies for older kids is seen to be fine these days.
If that is how your friend treats her children generally (ie ignoring them and encouraging them to ignore others around them) then it will have a negative impact on their development.
YANBU to judge imo. The people who think that it's ok to say not one word to any of your children during a meal out are bu.

greenworm · 12/04/2017 12:41

I don't think it's U to let kids have screens for a bit at restaurants, but it does seem U for them to be glued to them for the whole time with no conversation at all, especially when there are other children there to talk to.

WanderingTrolley1 · 12/04/2017 12:42

I would rather children were entertained with a screen than running about and/or shrieking.

Yabu.

Original poster

SilverLeafClover · 12/04/2017 12:44

I really don't think I am a perfect parent.

But there's no point defending myself. What shall I do? Recount all the crap things I do as a parent in order to be accepted on MN? Because nobody is allowed to want something resembling decent behavior in a restaurant?

OP posts:

IvyLeagueUnderTheSea · 12/04/2017 12:44

I would rather children were entertained with a screen than running about and/or shrieking.

Those aren't the only two options you know.

abcBears · 12/04/2017 12:45

nobody is allowed to want something resembling decent behavior in a restaurant?

I am not sure what you call decent behaviour though

Katmeifyoucan · 12/04/2017 12:45

We give our kids our phones when we are out if we are really desperate. Sometimes the younger one in particular just won't sit still despite bringing colouring books and playing I Spy on repeat. I really do not give a hoot if anyone judges that small snapshot of our lives.

Reactivedog · 12/04/2017 12:45

Yanbu, I would have judged too. Why couldn't the children have all chatted together? It seems rude to the other dc there.

Lottapianos · 12/04/2017 12:45

'I would rather children were entertained with a screen than running about and/or shrieking. '

Any chance there might be a middle ground between these two extremes?

Batgirlspants · 12/04/2017 12:46

Fucks sake if your kids of 4 and 6 can't sit through a meal without screens that's bloody terrible parenting.

Funny Damcergirl my teens have too

TheRealPooTroll · 12/04/2017 12:46

Is it an either/or though? All little ones get fidgety in restaurants when they have to wait but you can interact with them and play games/chat. It's not a case of give them a tablet or let them annoy other diners.

Lottapianos · 12/04/2017 12:48

'Recount all the crap things I do as a parent in order to be accepted on MN? '

And some people still wouldn't be happy....

You should be allowed to share an opinion on a bloody opinion board without being hauled over the coals for being smug and 'perfect'. Some people must walk around without a thought in their heads benignly nodding at everything they see

Itaintme · 12/04/2017 12:50

The smug parenting on this thread is hilarious.

abcBears · 12/04/2017 12:50

Fucks sake if your kids of 4 and 6 can't sit through a meal without screens that's bloody terrible parenting.

If a 4 year old can sit still and quietly for more than 2 hours, I would be very worried! I am all for good behaviour and apparently I am very strict, but it's not normal for such a young child to be happily plonked on a chair for so long.

SolomanDaisy · 12/04/2017 12:50

6 is indeed old for peppa pig. I have a nearly 6 year-old and neither he nor his friends would sit silently watching peppa pig for an hour. That sounds like a) children who've never seen a screen before or b) a child who really, really didn't want to interact with the other kids present. IME getting a screen out when there are several kids around leads to sharing/arguing/screen related discussion which turns into general playing. I can't imagine an actual six year-old behaving like this.

TheRealPooTroll · 12/04/2017 12:50

And I don't get why kids of age 4 and 6 'won't sit still'. Surely if kids of that age are getting up out of their seats and running around when you've asked them not to you would enforce some consequences rather than bribing them with an Ipad/phone. Or are some parents genuinely not able to get nt children of this age to follow simple instructions?

ChocChocPorridge · 12/04/2017 12:51

Better ipads than the bloody crayons they hand out these days. I spend as much time rummaging around under the table to get them as I do eating (square crayons would solve it).

Generally we talk in restaurants, ipads aren't allowed at the dinner table etc. but if we've had a long day, and DP and I want a nice, leisurely meal, coffee after etc. then the kids get pads/phones when they're not eating. Judge all you want. Sometimes I want an adult meal, but we have no-one to babysit and let the phones do it for us.

We can talk about the boats/cars/pretty flowers/dinner/pokemon/what they did at school with the kids another day.

lazyparenting101 · 12/04/2017 12:51

Other people's children are boring - at best. No one cares about the fascinating conversations of a 5 year old. I don't impose my kids on other adults.

abc So other children are boring and your own children are a burden, you sound like a wonderful parent! Why did you have children?

CarpetBagger · 12/04/2017 12:52

Fucks sake if your kids of 4 and 6 can't sit through a meal without screens that's bloody terrible parenting

I just can't help wonder the mentality of someone who trots this shite out. It shows lack of intelligence, empathy, sympathy etc, intolerance and basic rudeness and as I said before the kind of person who makes dining out with small dc in the UK unbearable for those of us with dc who will not sit still.

Op you clearly feel your own parenting skills and your own DC are far Superior to your friends. I feel you should be honest with them and tell them so and not meet up with again.

witsender · 12/04/2017 12:52

Not my style, but my kids have been to all variety of restaurants (same age as the two in question) and have done since they were babies so while they fidget, they're great company.

All kids are different though, and the parents would be liable to be judged had they been riotous too. So while I would think that it wasn't my style and I don't like it, I would try not to think past that.

Itaintme · 12/04/2017 12:53

If the kids were sitting quietly looking at peppa pig so I could enjoy my meal without having to talk about bloody boats i would consider it a win

sirfredfredgeorge · 12/04/2017 12:53

Why couldn't the children have all chatted together?

They were too bust being entranced by the large boats and surfers they could see.

CarpetBagger · 12/04/2017 12:54

We can talk about the boats/cars/pretty flowers/dinner/pokemon/what they did at school with the kids another day

Or even another hour before the meal.

we talk to our dc non stop all the time and I am a sahm I do it alllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll day for every moment, a meal out with other adults, I want to talk to them not my 4 year old.

Flip

1 2 ··· 5 6 7 ··· 29 30