Children watching Peppa Pig on phones in restaurant

[SilverLeafClover]

We went for lunch with friends yesterday at the Fifteen restaurant near Newquay. I only mention the place because it has an amazing view of the beach and the sea, which made it all the more surprising that as soon as we sat down, my friend and her husband handed their children (both NT, aged 4 and 6) two phones. For the duration of the meal, the children sat zombie-like and watched Peppa Pig on the screens.

I will admit, I judged.

The parents did not speak to their children and the children were just glued to the screens. My three children aged 8, 5, 3 are not angels but managed to sit through a short meal (main course and then ice cream, no staters, no coffees) without needing screens. I talked to my adult friends and kept an eye on my children, pointing out stuff that was happening outside, large boats passing by, surfers, dogs etc.

Am I am a Luddite? Or am I right to think unlimited access to screens during a meal out is not right?

I did read your posts. You've seen it happen ONCE and cite ONE study as evidence of huge concerns. The ONE incident you've seen may well indicate neglectful disengaged parents but they'd be that without screens too.

Yes - I described the one family I saw - I didn't say it applies to all families - I hope it doesn't.

With regard to sleep deprivation - that was collected from 20 studies conducted internationally and therefore was significant enough for the NHS to publish.

AH let the kids watch peppa its 2017 !

There are loads of (conflicting) studies about the effects of screens on children, but mostly seem to state that a lot of use is negative. I'm not anti, and want my kids to know what they're doing with technology, but don't want to rely on needing to fish it out every time they need pacifying or keeping quietly entertained. I use Pipity Activity cases for my lot in these situations.... so much better. They were recommended by a friend who is a KS1 teacher, after a chat about ipads. She says that kids coming into school these days have noticeably poorer fine motor skills. Need to think about what kids are doing in their 'quiet down time' ... it's early days and we won't know the long term effects of screen use. I certainly don't want to look back and regret using them too much.

sodabreakjam, so how do you force a baby to watch something. I just can't imagine how that works. In my experience, I have 4 kids and 4 grandchildren, forcing a baby to do anything is pretty difficult. I have seen two adults wrestling with a baby to try and change a nappy, not sure what they would have had to do to force him to watch something he didn't want to watch.

Pippa - that is interesting about fine motor control. I wonder if it is anything to do with screen use or caused by something completely different. I would have thought children would have opportunities to improve their motor control at nursery etc. as well as at home.

The Pipity activity cases seems to get good ratings. Some people say it is expensive for what it is but I suppose once you have the case, you can top it up with cheaper stuff from Amazon.

Granny - the family I described set the tablets up on the table before they settled the children in their seats. The tablets were switched on before the food was put down. The parents didn't interact with the children and they barely seemed to interact with each apart from basic comments about collecting the food. The children's only interaction was with the tablet, not their parents - that is what I meant by force-fed.

Of course, it all could have been different in their hotel room, on the beach or by the pool - perhaps they were playing with them, reading to them and singing nursery rhymes all the time. I don't know.

Putting a screen infront of a baby isn't forcing them to watch it, I think your language is deliberately sensationalising it.

I homeschooled my children until they were 8 or 9, varied with when the child wanted to start school. We were with our children 24/7, far more than most parents, possibly more than you were with yours? I taught my children all the things that they might do at school, read, write, count, cutting out, we did it all. My daughter wanted to learn a musical instrument, I didn't know a note of music and to go to the baby group a parent had to go with them and join in. I was soon bottom of the class as all the 3 and 4 year olds raced ahead but after a few years I could read music and pick out simple tunes, she of course was flying through exams and performing in festivals but that isn't really the point. There would have been days on holiday when you might have seen my daughter on her gameboy and you would have thought we had no interaction with her. How wrong you would have been.

It is horrible to judge people when you don't know the whole story. The only positive thing about it is that it might make you feel good about yourself, do you need that sort of validation?

Yes, whatever you say, Grannie. Bye!

Couldn't agree more granny.

Yes, whatever you say, Grannie. Bye

Hahaha the passive aggression!!

Hi Sodabreadjam, my KS1 teacher friend really feels that it's down to time spent swiping on ipads etc, when previously many kids would have been doing more colouring, cutting-out, folding etc... all great for fine motor skills. She is passionate about kids developing all the basic skills and thinking creatively.
The Pipity stuff isn't cheap, but it has everything with it that you need to do all the above, and the books are printed on really thick paper, so that the crafty stuff the kids can make is pretty robust. We've just found it all to be an easy and fun alternative to the ipads, and it's a lot cheaper than they are!!

Pippa - what your friend says make sense about the motor skills and probably about creativity too. Nothing like getting your hands on actual materials to get the creative juices flowing.

Some people like to keep a very tidy minimalist house these days so aren't keen on the mess that can come with crafts. It probably fits in better for them to have their DCs playing on a tablet.

I remember my DSs got creative by stuffing play doh into the Lego Duplo and making a collage with the toy money form their post office set. We used to invite some of their tidy- minded friends round to help us clear up!

Your DCs seem to have good fun with the Pipity cases. I'll keep those in mind when I have presents to buy. Thanks.

*from their post office.