AIBU to want my goat?

[ChrisYoungFuckingRocks]

OK, so I've read on here that apparently council tenants are getting free goats (on top of getting almost free housing)!

I feel this is massive discrimination against us private tenants who pay full rent. I demand equal rights, and I want my goat!!!

AIBU? 😂😂

Evil DLA gets you 2 goats or two flatscreen telly's. I read so in the daily mail.

chris what if I harness it to pull my
wheelchair to hospital ? coughs up woodworm I could use it to take me to my chest screening kicks unpasteurised milk bowl under Welsh dresser

what if I harness it to pull my wheelchair to hospital ?

Gosh, I'm not sure Patricia! If the alpaca is pulling a cart, the cart needs to have red ribbons tied to it, and a big warning sign informing people behind you that there is the possibility of stepping in shit (which of course you have to clean up). If said pulling occurs in December, the cart also has to play Jingle Bells on loop.

Pulling a wheelchair would mean it's transporting human cargo, and the rules seem a bit fuzzy on that. You'd have to check with your council I think. I think the alpaca will also need to be registered with a physiotherapist in case of any possible damage to its back from pulling too much weight. And of course, if it's pulling you through a council minefield, it would have to receive danger pay.

You know I've just checked & for some inexplicable reason the letter from the DWP about my DLA entitlement makes no mention at all of animals of any sort. I think it is a conspiracy of silence on their part. Prejudice against my Borough. Just because it's the "least peaceful" in the U.K. & has the largest police station in Europe they think they can deprive people of their basic rights like this. Swine. (Not giving out those either, I note...)

I'm attending a DLA tribunal tomorrow ( honestly!) and am now tempted to ask for my goat should it not go my way

Good luck imnot!

Thanks Unborn, I'll start emotionally blackmailing DS1 to move in tomorrow. Now, goats or TVs, goats or TVs...

Good luck imnot (a wee snack for your goat - am not envisioning things going wrong, but rather, you riding away in in triumph in a goat-drawn chariot...)

I'mnot I had my PIP one last year, I went from 0 points on a medical to high care and standard mobility. Tribunals are a lot fairer then medicals

chris
Too much weight? TOO MUCH WEIGHT!!. I'll have you know my wheelchair is lightweight aluminium and I only weigh the regulatory 26 1/2 stone allowed for a person on DLA (just enough to work from home like Homer Simpson) or I wouldn't get the mobility part. Eats another cream eclaire

a big warning sign informing people behind you that there is the possibility of stepping in shit (which of course you have to clean up).

Waitrose have an excellent range of alpaca poo bags

Are they organic?

DH is a copper. Since borough Police buildings are council owned, is he entitled a goat for the station?

To anyone who dares suggest no, I submit this photograph of a Goat in uniform.
Your argument is invalid.

We do not have a pond but we do have a large area of wasteland at the bottom of garden which falls into a convenient hollow. If i get the hose running now it coyld be filled by the ti.e the council have completed the bureaucratic amd logistical procedures involved with delivery of my hippo which i have decoded to call Hercules as i need a strong man to dig the garden glares menacingly at dp

Oh dear Patricia - I meant no offense - I have no idea how much you weigh . The council is just concerned about health & safety and basic goat and camelid rights and you don't want PETA involved.

Waitrose have an excellent range of alpaca poo bags

Shopping at Waitrose is a whole other thread Just. 😂😂😂

I hear the Scottish government are going to start a universal goat programme. But you have to promise to dress it in wee tartan jackets and hats at all times. They come with a shite poem too.

You have to buy the jackets and hats yourself of course.

I assumed that the Scottish government would be offering Loch Ness monsters rather than goats... obviously only to those in large detached properties with their own swimming pools though

Well they've started up a haggis breeding population but they're having to use goats until they've got sufficient numbers.

I think you can apply for a DLA Nessie.

How about if everyone on MN emails Waitrose to ask if the Alpaca Poo Bags are organic.

You won't need a jacket and hat for your haggis of course. That's just so people can easily tell you've got a Scottish government universal free goat and not a means-tested rUK one. Once the Haggises are rolled out there'll be no need.

There's going to be a haggis pilot in Angus starting in September.

Will the Welsh be receiving dragons and sheep depending upon their status?

Can I get an extra goat as I'm an OAP?

Can I get an extra goat as I'm an OAP?

NO baby boomers had it all - will you not think of the children?

Awww Milady - you're making me want to move to Scotland now. So cute .