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Original poster

WWUD? Random puking teenager in our kitchen

809 replies

chastenedButStillSmiling · 09/04/2017 01:03

We were out this eve, but not esp late (home by 10:30). DD has brought mates back. We know some not all.

They've been drinking booze I've provided (but was supposed to be more than one evening).

DD is 15, yr 10.

One of the kids chucked up. She's fine. She was here on a sleepover,m her parents aware. I know where she lives (20 mins away) but don't know her parents or how to contact them.

I've put her to bed, on her front. Sick bucket and water easily to hand.

What should I do?

OP posts:
AntiGrinch · 09/04/2017 10:44

This thread is hilarious.
I can't be the only one who wants to attend the OP's parenting classes.

I am also dying to know what OP's own childhood was like. I am imagining her at the age of 21, the night before her wedding, being tucked up in bed with a teddy by her mum who then lovingly trundles over the drinks trolley for her nightly 6 cocktails.

And also - why post on the internet that you have a drunk teenager passed out in your house? Either you're cool with alcohol, you have been a drunk teenager, all your friends were drunk teenagers - you understand that providing a bit of booze and no supervision is cover for bringing in all kinds - and in that case you know what to do about the inevitable casualty (or more than one).

OR you don't agree with underage drinking, except possibly a small glass of wine for your own child, only at the same table and at the same time as you - and in that case I would understand why you need advice. But I don't get how you can be all "yeah so I left the 15 year old with her mates and some lagers, and then, like, who knew? One of them puked and passed out. So, like, what happens now?"

I don't get this thread at all. It is full of intriguing mysteries.

MsJamieFraser · 09/04/2017 10:45

Who is spoiling for a fight Hmm

Im not going to apologise for bring factual and lawful information to the thread when posters are saying what she did was illegal. The fact is, it was not.

You may disagree, however thats your issue to think about, stop projecting on to me, because you dont agree with the facts.

Orlantina · 09/04/2017 10:46

And also - why post on the internet that you have a drunk teenager passed out in your house

Grin

Because MN would be so cool with that and have absolutely nothing to say on the matter at all Grin

hmcAsWas · 09/04/2017 10:50

*RhiWares' - don't be ridiculous, this is not about 'performance parenting', its just stupid and ill judged to allow 14 and 15 year olds in Y10 to have alcoholic drinks at parties and posters will rightly point this out.

Personally I would go with preparing your dc to drink responsibly and exposing them to it before they disappear off unsupervised to University, but the time to do this is as late as possible when they are Sixth Formers

Paul78 · 09/04/2017 10:51

Again. She left under 16 year olds with alcohol unsupervised.

It is illegal to do so when there is risk involved. There clearly was risk as a girl has been sick and an adult who teaches parenting classes has gone on an internet forum to get advice.

AntiGrinch · 09/04/2017 10:55

OP, did you go to boarding school? I've had a sudden inspiration about how to explain your view of a good childhood = lots of over achievement in sport + rigid bedtimes and schedule micro management + plentiful alcohol

RhiWrites · 09/04/2017 11:00

HMC, calling my opinion stupid and ridiculous doesn't make me want to discuss it with you. We clearly have different values.

IlikeBeans, I think when you're mate gets hammered you hold her hair back and get her water rather than scampering off and leaving your mum to deal with it. Everyone is responsible for being decent to their friends.

ILikeBeansWithKetchup · 09/04/2017 11:04

Whocansay - I actually had a rather debauched teenagerdom. Lots of alcohol. But not at a gathering with a few other friends.Especailly of the same sex.

We used to go round each other's houses and sing Rick Astley into hairbrushes too.

We differentiated between house parties (empties) with 20 or more people and hanging out with mates. This did not need alcohol. And , if it did, it would never ever have been parentally provided. That does seem to have changed.

multivac · 09/04/2017 11:04

I started another thread about what time we should be sending her to bed, and the MN consensus was that she'd leave home and hate me forever if I didn't chill/butt out and give her more responsibility.

Yeah, I remember that thread. You're just mucking about, OP, aren't you?

Willow2017 · 09/04/2017 11:06

Rhi
Its not the daughters job to stop her friend drinking too much its the OPs job. She went out and left a bunch of kids with a stash of alcohol, what did she think was going to happen?

All it would take was someone to post on social media that they were partying at X's house and the house could have been full of teens by the time op got back and there could have been much worse going on.

Its not rocket science, you dont leave kids unsupervised drinking while you go out!

15yr olds dont need alcohol to have a good time. Yes have a glass of wine at home or a bottle of beer with the family/at an occaision sometimes. Yes teach them responsible drinking not binge drinking just because its the holidays. But leaving a bunch of kids to get drunk? No way.

She didnt even know half the kids, why did she decide that it was ok for them to be drinking unsupervised while she fecked off?

ILikeBeansWithKetchup · 09/04/2017 11:08

Mrs - I have at no point said what the OP did was illegal. Please don't suggest I am projecting. How patronising.

I utterly detest this idea that we ONLY do things if they are not illegal and that this is our only barometer of sensible behaviour. It feels like you are saying people should do things BECAUSE they are legal.

I know full well I can legally buy alcohol for my child. Not going to do it , though. Certainly not enough to get him drunk. Unsupervised. Oh come on.

ILikeBeansWithKetchup · 09/04/2017 11:09

I think so, too, multivac

Orlantina · 09/04/2017 11:09

Its not rocket science, you dont leave kids unsupervised drinking while you go out

That's probably a session on a parenting course for parents of teens Grin

LIZS · 09/04/2017 11:09

Did the other parents know about your permissive attitude towards alcohol? I'd be very unimpressed if she were my child otherwise.

Pardonwhat · 09/04/2017 11:10

Wow! Some hilarious responses here.
If you think you're 15 year old isn't accessing drink then you are foolish at best. I'd much rather my 15 year old be sampling alcohol in a safe environment such as OPs.

ILikeBeansWithKetchup · 09/04/2017 11:11

Rhi please explain how facilitating drinking in teenagers is something to do with 'values'?

Thank you .

Orlantina · 09/04/2017 11:11

I'd much rather my 15 year old be sampling alcohol in a safe environment such as OPs

Is it sampling though?

Really? Just a little taste of wine?

ILikeBeansWithKetchup · 09/04/2017 11:13

My 15yo hasn't, thanks Pardon. This normalising of risky behaviours drives me to distraction. Some have. Some haven't.

And it plainly wasn't 'safe'. Someone threw up and was then pretty much comatose.

LIZS · 09/04/2017 11:13

That's fine if it is your child and you are supervising - neither applies here.

StealthPolarBear · 09/04/2017 11:14

And in what way was it safe?

StealthPolarBear · 09/04/2017 11:15

Ketchup, a recent survey backs you up. The evidence shows that fewer young people are drinking but those that do drink more iirc

ILikeBeansWithKetchup · 09/04/2017 11:15

As a teacher btw can I say this is the sort of thing that causes massive distractions to learning all day Monday nearly every week : teens with their tales of woe about that happened to whom and with whom when they had been drinking. Every Monday - not once a half term.

The idea that some of this is pretty much CAUSED by their parents is mind boggling.

Pardonwhat · 09/04/2017 11:18

It was safe in the sense that it was better than being on a park bench.
I'd suggest that a 15 year old who hasn't tried alcohol is in the minority.
I actually think making teenagers experimenting with alcohol such a taboo subject is more dangerous than 'normalising' it.
No the girl throwing up isn't ideal. But it happens. Hopefully she's learnt a bit of a lesson to not have so much.

StealthPolarBear · 09/04/2017 11:18

Survey of 15 year olds run in 2015

Just over three in five young people reported that they had previously had a whole alcoholic drink (not just a sip) (62 per cent). 6 per cent of all young people were classed as regular drinkers (drinking alcohol at least once a week). 8 per cent of young people drink alcohol about once a fortnight, 11 per cent drink about once a month, and 32 per cent drink only a few times a year.

StealthPolarBear · 09/04/2017 11:19

2 in 5 have never had an alcoholic drink
only a minority are regular drinkers
part of the reason teenagers drink, have sex etc is the sense that everyone is doing it.