Was I U to wear the same outfit to two weddings?

[GameOldBirdz]

Since Christmas, I've been to four weddings. I'm that age where everyone I know is getting married!

I wore the same outfit to three of these weddings. Two of these same-outfit weddings were the same crowd of people- family. My cousin, who was at both family same-outfit weddings, sent me a load of photographs yesterday and said in the email "It's a shame you couldn't be bothered to wear something different".

I replied to thank her for sending and said "I'm sorry if I offended you recycling my outfit, I'm cheap ". We have a good relationship, we're friends, I thought she'd take this in good humour. But no, she sent a massive paragraph saying I was disrespectful, that it was very bad show, it was rude and that if I didn't want to go I should have declined the invitation rather than turn up inappropriately dressed (her words).

I did want to go to both weddings, it wasn't remotely meant as a 'fuck you' to the couple getting married. I told my mum about it and she agreed with my cousin that it was inappropriate.

So now I'm doubting myself and worried that I've made a massive faux pas and that everyone hates me?

So, was I being unreasonable to recycle the outfit? I should say that I did use a different bag/ accessories for both weddings but the basic outfit was the same.

[SapphireStrange]

pho3be, if you read the OP, it says she apologised in a joking way, for being 'cheap', which is a running joke between her and cousin. She hasn't apologised for/replied to the subsequent long rant from the cousin.

[Maxwellthecat]

Was it her wedding???

[GameOldBirdz]

Oh yes, I was apologising in a joking way!

It wasn't her wedding.

Oooh, I'm looking forward to Thursday now

[DJBaggySmalls]

Remind them there used to be clothes rationing when there was a war on and it used to be unpatriotic to wear clothes once and throw them away.
While their brains are trying to process how thats relevant, run away.

[FerdinandsRevenge]

So what, buy a new outfit and bin it after every use!? I understand why celebrities feel obligated to change outfits..but really.

Wait, Op, you're not Kate Middleton are you??

[wonkylegs]

I didn't give a monkeys about what people wore to my own wedding let alone other peoples so I think it's a bit of a weird reaction.
Yes my male mate who turned up in jeans & a pink t-shirt raised a few eyebrows with some of the older guests but I have a hazy recollection at best about what anybody else wore (Ooo except for my friends gorgeous sari, that stuck in my mind) and whether or not they wore it to other events (it was a summer of weddings with a big overlap of people so there's a fair chance there was some people wearing the same)
I wear the same stuff to loads of weddings/events but tend to have them on a long loop mainly so they are not this seasons and I don't end up wearing the same thing as someone else (Coast outfits are particularly bad for this) , mainly in case they look better in it than me!
I haven't changed size much over the years so this works well.

[FerdinandsRevenge]

You should wear it every time you see her now. Occasionally stage a photo of a day out and be wearing that dress. Email it to her.

[FerdinandsRevenge]

Remind them there used to be clothes rationing when there was a war on and it used to be unpatriotic to wear clothes once and throw them away.While their brains are trying to process how thats relevant, run away.

[FeralBeryl]

Please please wear the outfit on Thursday when you see her

Suspect she is possibly on glue, I've just worn a lovely outfit for a wedding and have cleaned it and put away ready for another next month.

I am a scruffy bastard and wouldn't have weddingy type things lying around so yes I recycle outfits.

As long as people are clean and tidy and want to share in your special day - who gives a shit what they're wearing?

[Iwanttobeanonymous]

I have been wearing the same dress to weddings and some family events for a long time. Dressing up is not my style and we don't get out much and the dress is classic. I just wear it with different cardigans accessories.
I am considering whether to wear for a funeral next week.

[GameOldBirdz]

Ferdinand Bollocks, you've found me out. T'is I.

[BreakfastAtSquiffanys]

Your cousin and mum are bonkers.

The only time is it wrong to wear a dress a second time to a wedding if the first time you wore it was at your own wedding and it was a big white meringue

[ToffeeForEveryone]

Honestly? Two family weddings close together, I would probably notice if someone wore the same outfit. And no, it's not the same for men, but there we go. Another double standard.

However, I would not read into it that it was rude or disrespectful like your cousin has, and I certainly wouldn't be batshit enough to have a go at someone about it, no matter how close family they were. THAT's rude.

[Increasinglymiddleaged]

The only time is it wrong to wear a dress a second time to a wedding if the first time you wore it was at your own wedding and it was a big white meringue



Yanbu op. Interestingly though a few years ago when I posted about wearing the same dress to 2 office Christmas parties I was told by some people that was unreasonable (but not the majority).

[Headofthehive55]

Even lady Di used to recycle outfits!

[flowery]

I don't understand how it could be disrespectful or inappropriate? How odd?

Was it a bikini? Was it a long white dress? No? Then it was neither disrespectful nor inappropriate.

Personally I wouldn't do it, I like having new outfits, can afford it, and am vain enough to care about the same people seeing me in the same outfit to weddings. But I am fully aware that is very shallow and completely unnecessary.

[BarbaraofSeville]

Even if people notice you have worn the same outfit before, what does it matter? I would not take any notice of someone who thought that a new outfit for each wedding, christmas party etc was necessary anyway.

Perhaps if people have money to burn they can buy a new outfit each time if they sell it or donate it to charity afterwards, but that doesn't give them the right to judge others who choose to buy one outfit to wear on several occasions.

[FerdinandsRevenge]

[MatildaTheCat]

The non recycling of clothes is incredibly wasteful and non Eco friendly. Tell your cousin you are planning to wear the outfit to every possible function for the next ten years.

If it's good enough for Kate and Liz...

[alltouchedout]

Who on earth cares that much about other people's clothes?

Also, sure it's been said many many times already (haven't rtft, just the OP's replies), but no one gets cross when men wear the same suit to every single event, do they?

[LagunaBubbles]

You should wear it every time you see her now. Occasionally stage a photo of a day out and be wearing that dress. Email it to her.

[Sprungout]

What a silly shallow cow for criticising you.
I wish I could still carry off a jumpsuit.

[Scarzo]

No problem at all wearing your dress more than once.

My Mum wore a beautiful silk trouser suit to my sisters' wedding.

She lacks confidence in herself and hates shopping, so she wore the same outfit to my wedding a few years later (although she did cleverly convert the trousers into a skirt).

She looked lovely at both, no one noticed and no one was offended .

Your cousin is being ridiculous and unreasonable.

[Maverick66]

I know a lady who has worn the same outfit to each of her DC's weddings.
Once as mother of the bride and twice as mother of the groom 😯

[Epipgab]

Glad you'll be wearing it on Thursday and saying what you think! I would love to look good in a jumpsuit I reckon a photo of the outfit on a hanger would be the perfect profile picture for social media too...