Men on gynae ward

[roarityroar]

Yesterday I was taken into hospital after heavy bleeding. I needed a blood transfusion and then went into theatre for surgery. They ask you to keep all sanitary pads to show how much you're bleeding, which is obviously very personal and after the general anaesthetic I felt groggy and vulnerable.

There are 4 beds in this ward with curtains. Two of the other three women have their partners here. I feel pretty vulnerable as it is and given it's the gynaecology ward AIBU to really not want random non-HCP men just a curtain away when I'm bleeding from my sodding vagina?

Nope, just think it's shitty to be unpleasant to someone who has been very unwell and felt very vulnerable (or indeed anyone). Clearly you disagree.

boohoo

Oh dear...

Willothewisp you're just being rude now.

I wouldn't bother feeding it.

Oh xpost Im too slow.
you've gone beyond rude now .

glad you think so 😊

Willow why do you get to decide how other people feel? Lots of people are saying they feel vulnerable in this situation, why do you get to decide they are unreasonable? You are minimising their feelings, their experience.

not much gets deleted in here but personal attacks do

Giing back to the pp who said that there are men who will gawp.

After having my dd I had a massive flood , I got up out of bed with blood all over me and started to pull the covers back so they weren't lying in the pool of blood .
There was a Minister visiting across the way and he never missed a beat of what I was doing.
I don't think he even blinked the whole time.

I think you'll all find that much further down the line, I was sorry about the position that the OP was in and her vulnerability, but this tarring all men with the same brush crap is awful. I doubt the men on the ward are really there to either leer at you, talk about you, in any way try to embarrass you or abuse you. maybe the men that were there with their partners were there for an emergency and simply there to SUPPORT their loved ones in time of need.

but that's just awful isn't it, because instead of being concerned about their own partners they'd much rather gawk at OP 🙄 they are men, not boys.

Read the post directly above yours there, willo?

The point is that some men are like that. The vast majority are decent but the OP isn't to know which type of person they are. Knowing that most men are decent isn't going to stop her feeling vulnerable from the totally unknown men she's having to spend 24hrs a day around, in a very vulnerable state.

it's not about the vulnerability, it's a shame she feels that way, it's a shame she's been ill.
it's also a shame the way men are portrayed sometimes.
a female on the ward visiting there partner during the night could stare at OP, make comments, anything at all, doesn't matter what gender you are, all comes down to the type of person you are (no doubt you'll all have made up your mind about what type of person I am 😂)

Just to put another spin on this. OH was in A & E and was going to be taken Ward ? I was absolutely horrified. I said you cant to that to my OH. Ward ? used to be the Gynae ward. It is had been changed to a Medical Decisions Unit and had both male and female patients.
Not every man wants to be on a female ward! Some of these men are likely to be terrified in case they see "anything".

From what I can gather it seems that Medical Decision Units aren't considered wards as such, and so can be mixed. You're supposed to be in a bay of the same sex, and not share toilets/bathrooms with the opposite sex. You're only supposed to be there for less than 24 hours. Whether that's the reality or not I don't know.

It's always going to be about vulnerability and exposure willo

anyway, I'm really sorry if I've offended, I've got a big gob and say before thinking 😊 I'll leave it here now 💖

Most men are decent

Decent people don't want to make vulnerable people feel threatened or exposed or humiliated or vulnerable

I like to think my husband is a decent person and that I'm bringing my sons up to be. Part of that is about thinking about other people, and how what you do could impact on them even if you don't mean it to.

I'm glad I live abroad and no longer rely on the NHS. It sounds a shambles by the sounds of this thread.

Everyone is entitled to have there partner/ husband there with them regardless of the type of ward. you need to remember that some of those women may be going through something far worse (such as cervical cancer, cancer of the womb etc) than you and need support from loved ones.

When I was going to AN appointments, the loos had stickers on the back of the doors that you could attach to your urine sample if you were scared of your partner.

There are no such initiatives for men. Because men aren't in danger from women. Two women are killed every week by their partners. Some of those men are going to be hanging around the gynae ward.

Honestly, this stuff is feminism 101. Does it really need repeating?