WIBU to have abandoned this guy at a petrol station?

[HeadFairy]

So I'm coming home from a late shift, it's half past midnight and I pull in to an unmanned Asda petrol station round the back of a 24hour store to get some petrol. I notice a young guy in a hoodie standing a few feet away from the pumps, he appears to be on his phone. I fill up and as I finish he comes up to me and asks if I'm able to call him a taxi as his phone has run out of charge and could I call him a taxi. I'm not local so finding a taxi number would have involved me standing there for a few minutes having a look on google, and I wasn't keen. No real reason, he was really apologetic and polite, but I just wasn't keen. There are a few shops around there, so I thought maybe he could walk and see if there was a taxi shop somewhere locally. But now I'm feeling a bit bad that I left him there. So WIBU?

joystir59 maybe because i had no idea that during certain events all public transport stopped unlike where i have lived, but thanks for that

I would have got into my car and rang him a taxi. I'd like to think someone would help my son out of he was stranded.

I would have got in the car and rang him one.

I have rung for a taxi for someone once - they were drunk and we were on a train. I did feel intimidated but the train was fairly busy.

A good person, even one in difficulties himself, would understand why a woman would want to look out for her own safety first and foremost.

If you are able to help someone without taking a gamble on your own safety, go for it.

If not, well, I wouldn't do it. Bad people depend on your willingness to be seen as nice overriding natural caution.

Some really naïve and OP-shaming responses to this thread - he was in no immediate danger and, given the time and circumstances, she was pretty sensible.

Something that has always stayed with me is seeing a woman on television describing how her attacker approached her on a busy London high street, saying urgently that his girlfriend was in labour and begging for her help. It was at the exact moment that she paused and said 'Errr...', obviously wondering what to do, that he put a knife to her throat and dragged her into a building. She endured a horrific and violent rape attack.

A man blocked my path once when I was turning into my own road about 9pm and I apologised to him as I did the pedestrian-dance and carried on my way. Seconds later he ran after me and mugged me. I was ok, but it certainly refined my fear-instincts.

Perhaps that moment of interaction is to size you up/distract/get you off your original course?

I sometimes wonder if it would be a good idea to carry a second, cheap PAYG phone in case of emergencies. The sort that you can charge up and it lasts for about a week.

When I lived in London, I was approached by a young woman near King's Cross. It was the middle of the afternoon.

She said she was afraid of her big boyfriend and could I help her as he was violent towards her I am not sure what she wanted ME to do about it. She tried to get me to come a little way with her - to an alley/side street.

I just had a bad vibe about it and said I was sorry she was in trouble but that the best thing to do was to approach the nearest police station and I gave her the nearest one. There was no sign of her boyf at the time so she wasn't in his clutches at that moment. I offered to go with her to the station but she went off.

I later read in the paper that there was a gang going around where a young woman in "distress" was put forward to lure a passerby to come with her and once up an alley, would be beaten up by the guys and robbed.

I am sure this was the same crowd. Something just didn't ring true for me.

Even if she was genuine, while that would have been tragic, I am really not sure what I could have done. I couldn't take on her big violent boyfriend. You'd think she'd at least have asked a man! I am kind of shy and mousy at best.

That's why I am 99.9% sure they were the gang I read about.

As a mother of a teenage lad, I would hope that a kind stranger would help him if he found himself in a fix late at night and unable to call or get home. Teenage lads are vulnerable too!

It is understandable that OP might have felt unsafe and wanted to protect herself. However, if the lad approached OP when she was already out of her vehicle, then surely that would have been the moment to attack her, if foul pay was his intention? OP states that he was apologetic and polite; she could have got back into her car and locked the door and said that she would help him. She could have asked him if he knew the number of a local taxi company, so perhaps did not need to Google taxi firms as she states.

I understand the need for a lone woman to protect herself and be safe, but once locked in her vehicle, I think it was an overreaction to drive off and leave him stranded.

"What man with any sense approaches a lone woman? "

A man who wants a taxi. Should a man never approach a woman unless she's escorted by a man? Are you from Saudi?

There's been a few incidences where I live where a woman has approached people in supermarket car parks and petrol stations late at nightand asked for money/lifts/to ring for a taxi because of some sob story and then snatching the phone and doing a runner. She approached me outside Morrison's at 12 am but I told her to do one as she's well known

Instincts are there for a reason

As a mother of a teenage lad, I would hope that a kind stranger would help him if he found himself in a fix late at night and unable to call or get home. Teenage lads are vulnerable too!

Wouldn't you hope that your teenage lad would have the sense to walk across the road to the all night supermarket instead of loitering at a petrol station without a car?

We can 'poor bloke poor bloke' till the cows come home, but it is suspicious behaviour. We live in a society where lone women are the easiest targets for crime, and men are the main demographic who commit those crimes. Sorry, but if the guy took advantage of the OPs hesitation to jump in her car and make her drive him somewhere, we wouldn't be saying "Well the main thing is that you tried to help him, OP. And I hope they catch him." We'd be saying "Why did you engage with a strange man in an obviously dodgy situation?"

A few years back a female vlogger got into a world of trouble for complaining that a man jumped into a lift with her at a convention and asked her to go back to his room. She was called all sorts, people had all the sympathy in the world for the guy who she'd embarrassed, even though she never named or described him. Yet if she'd gone back to his room (as all her detractors thought she should - poor bloke poor bloke) and he'd attacked her, which is a thing that happens, the reaction from the same people would have been "But why would you go back to a man's hotel room if you didn't want sex??"

A man who wants a taxi. Should a man never approach a woman unless she's escorted by a man? Are you from Saudi?

Again - they weren't in the middle of nowhere. They were behind a 24 hour supermarket.

If you could choose between asking for assistance at a brightly lit supermarket full of people with phones, or hanging around in the dark at a petrol station waiting until someone comes along - which would you choose? And which would a mugger choose?

Not sure SingingSilver.

Do you agree with "What man with any sense approaches a lone woman? " then?

I'd say it depends on the context tbh.

But if a man approaches me when I'm on my own and it's night-time I'm going to feel freaked out. Because I was in that situation as a teenager, and I was raped.

That doesn't mean I don't trust men, but I will always place my safety over being polite/kind/helpful if I feel there is any risk. And largely because there is a 19 year old man - my son - at home who still needs his mother...

SingingSilver where are you from that has an all night shop open on a sunday night??
Why does everyone keepsaying this??
Maybe there was none open, as it was a sunday night!

OK, I was going by other comments, but this is what the Op says

there were lorries coming in and out of the Asda, I'm not sure if the shop was open or not but there were definitely staff there, I could hear their voices as they unloaded

If she could hear them, presumably so could he. And if he was on the level, he could easily have gone and got a number from one of them.

However, if the lad approached OP when she was already out of her vehicle, then surely that would have been the moment to attack her, if foul pay was his intention?

Let's not go too far down this unpleasant path, but no, without knowing his precise intentions there are many other plans he might have had in mind.

Presumably he was an innocent if naive man wanting help, but the OP had no way of knowing so she did the right thing.

SingingSilver where are you from that has an all night shop open on a sunday night??
Why does everyone keepsaying this??
Maybe there was none open, as it was a sunday night!

OP hasn't said but there is an all night, open 24 hours petrol station and shop 10 minutes walk from me and several shops, including an enormous Asda and an all night, open 24 hours Marks and Spencer's food shop no more than 20 minutes walk from me.

What if he was a potential rapist. Always go with your gut he's a guy he can figure it out hoodie or not I would of done what you did. Xx

A few years ago, I was asked for the time and got seriously mugged. If your instinct said to be cautious, you did the right thing.

I would have rang a taxi for him, but that's just me

YAB a bit U.

I can't see how ringing a taxi for the man would have resulted in the OP being assaulted!

User many ways if ringing for the taxi was "the bait", to distract,get close,get op to get her phone out etc