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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To confront these so called friends?

310 replies

YouKnowNothingJS · 26/03/2017 20:57

Arranged to see Beauty and the Beast with 3 friends. In a group chat, two cancelled as they couldn't afford it and the third cancelled as we should do it instead when everyone is free.

Flat mate who is also friends with one of them saw on snapchat that they'd all gone this afternoon. They'd blocked me from seeing this Snapchat.

Aibu to confront them? Tempted to leave a message in our group chat.

OP posts:

Trb17 · 26/03/2017 21:14

They're not your friends. Sorry

witchofzog · 26/03/2017 21:14

How fucking shit of them. I am sorry you were left out and had to find out like this. If there is one you feel you were closer to I would be tempted to confront first followed by the rest of them. Then, depending on what they say, disengage. At least your flatmate was loyal enough to let you know what is happenning.

Rumtopf · 26/03/2017 21:14

How bloody mean.
I'd have to call them out on it tbh, I couldn't just let that kind of behaviour go.

PoshPenny · 26/03/2017 21:14

That is truly shitty behaviour from people you thought were friends. I'd cut them out and move on somehow. So sneaky and underhand of them, I'm not sure how a friendship can recover from that.

RainbowJack · 26/03/2017 21:15

Arranged to see Beauty and the Beast with 3 friends.

They are not your friends.

What's the point of confronting them? So they call bullshit you?

Their actions speak louder than anything they could say to you.

Cut them out of your life and focus your energy on the ones who legit care for you.

Original poster

YouKnowNothingJS · 26/03/2017 21:15

Thanks everyone. I don't want to see them again so I might as well message them.

OP posts:

expatinscotland · 26/03/2017 21:15

I'd get a screenshot, send it to them in the group chat. With no message at all.

And don't respond to any messages they send.

Bunch of cunts.

VeryButchyRestingFace · 26/03/2017 21:16

On the bright side OP, BatB was tedious drivel.

I don't know if I could be arsed with the drama of a confrontation. I think I would just swiftly detach.

ShowMeWhatYouGot · 26/03/2017 21:17

I'm actually really angry for you

Wickedstepmum67 · 26/03/2017 21:17

How rude of them, and how hurtful for you. You deserve some real friends, OP, and I would waste no further energy on the ones who have let you down. 💐

Kittykatclaws · 26/03/2017 21:18

Sorry they treated you that way! Vile creatures!

I'd probably leave it, they sound like they'd turn it on you and make you feel even shittier!

JustSpeakSense · 26/03/2017 21:18

I'd send a message:

'Did you all go to the movie without me?'

(Straightforward question, no sarcasm , no anger, no passive aggressive comments)

MadMags · 26/03/2017 21:19

I would say:

Just FYI, blocking me from seeing a snap doesn't mean other people who know me don't see them. Hope you enjoyed the movie.

And then ignore. Cunts.

Isthereanybodythere · 26/03/2017 21:19

How reliable is the flat mate ? I don't use snap chat, so don't understand the intricacies of blocking people from a conversation ?

Do you have any proof beyond what flat mate says she's seen, has she showed you the evidence ?

Scrumptiousbears · 26/03/2017 21:19

Why do people have to be like this. Utter cunts.

passmethewineplease · 26/03/2017 21:19

They are no friends OP.

anotherpoisonprince · 26/03/2017 21:20

That's just plain nasty. I think I would just stop having anything to do with them. So sorry this has happened op

DixieNormas · 26/03/2017 21:20

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OliviaBenson · 26/03/2017 21:20

I would have to say something, but do try and keep the high ground. I'd say 'why did you all go to the cinema without me?' And see what happens.

VeryButchyRestingFace · 26/03/2017 21:20

Do you have any proof beyond what flat mate says she's seen, has she showed you the evidence ?

That thought had occurred to me...

Was your FM invited on this excursion?

JustSpeakSense · 26/03/2017 21:21

And when they respond with excuses and apologies (or even lies)

I'd just say

'That really hurts, I was looking forward to seeing it with you all, I'm devastated you don't want to spend time with me.'

And then block them and move on, they aren't your friends.

SabineUndine · 26/03/2017 21:22

That is a deliberately unkind thing to do. I wouldn't message them, I'd just block the whole lot and have no further contact.

Original poster

YouKnowNothingJS · 26/03/2017 21:22

How reliable is the flat mate ? I don't use snap chat, so don't understand the intricacies of blocking people from a conversation ?

Do you have any proof beyond what flat mate says she's seen, has she showed you the evidence ?

One of them had a story up of them sat in the cinema with the caption of finally watching B&B. You can customise your story so only certain people can see it.

It's up for 24 hours so I've seen it for myself on flat mates phone.

OP posts:

Nocabbageinmyeye · 26/03/2017 21:22

I would do what MadMags said, you ste calling them out on their shitty behaviour but not lower yourself to their level at the sane time. I know its hard but you are probably better off knowing that they aren't your friends

Epipgab · 26/03/2017 21:22

Yes to confronting them. The suggestion from SorrelSoup is just right.

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