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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to be really annoyed at this family?

232 replies

staveleymum · 24/03/2017 10:20

Every day (and I mean every) one family are late for school. They have 3 children and obviously mum doesn't drive as Dad brings them in the car and drops them off (on double yellows or a no parking area but that's a different rant)! I usually see them as I'm walking back to my car after I've waved my 2 in so I know they are late. It's only 5 - 10 mins but it must be disruptive to the class (their DD is my DD's class).

I know there is a special Mothers Day assembly this morning that Reception class do and one of their children is in this class. They cant even get to school on time for that event (and they didnt seem to be in much of a rush when I saw them either)!

I know they only live a mile away so they dont get caught up in traffic. Is it too much to ask to get them to school on time?

I dont suppose there is a lot the Head can do about it either? It just really winds me up every time I see them!

OP posts:

WyfOfBathe · 24/03/2017 12:38

If everyone minded their own business, most of the threads on Mumsnet wouldn't exist!

While I'm sure many families who are late have bigger things to deal with in their lives, many don't. I remember several times in my childhood waiting at the window for my godmother and her DC to arrive, only for them to turn up 20+ minutes late with no apology. There was no particular reason, and my mum says that even now - in her retirement - my godmother turns up to group events often an hour late.

OopsDearyMe · 24/03/2017 12:40

I'm with you too,but loads will tell you its none of your biz. Still back in the real world, its a piss take when others consistently get away with this stuff, when we all work so bloody hard to hit the mark!

BadTasteFlump · 24/03/2017 12:42

We're sometimes late.

Our family life is fine though

I just love my cosy bed - and so does DD

MaroonPencil · 24/03/2017 12:43

I help in DS's school and there is a child who is consistently late, ie the other children are sitting down having the register taken or just after when he comes in. It does not seem to disrupt the class particularly, he just hangs up his coat and comes and joins them. So I wouldn't worry about that, probably.

WorraLiberty · 24/03/2017 12:43

Anyone else think it's ironic that the OP is late returning to the thread?

Perhaps she's held up in traffic

therealpippi · 24/03/2017 12:43

There is a family who are always 20 min early and make the child stand in front of the class fir that ling so she could be first in.
This annoys me slightly.
Do you think it is my problem or theirs?

Live and let live OP. Try to enjoy your life more.

LozzaChops101 · 24/03/2017 12:51

I was the kid of the always late parent and it's made me pretty neurotic about time as an adult, to the point where I have to calculate the time it will take me to get somewhere, add a cushion for unexpected hold ups, then double the total. I was also the kid left on the steps for an hour at the end of the day with a really pissed off school teacher for company. It's not very fair on your kid's classmates, and it's definitely not fair on the kids of the late parents.

Sample1936 · 24/03/2017 12:55

Worra tut tut what if everybody else was late to reply. We've all worked very hard to ensure timely posts. It's not fair she's GETTING AWAY with it

Purplepicnic · 24/03/2017 13:02

My DH did the school run for a number of years and was late every day. No amount of explaining, nagging or cajoling worked. In his head if you have to be somewhere at 9am you leave at 9am. Some people are wired diffently.

This may make me sound crazy but I think I would end up divorcing my DH if he did this.

MycatsaPirate · 24/03/2017 13:12

I used to volunteer in a class for three years. Every single day without fail the same two children were late. Every single day.

It was disruptive. The register had been taken. The kids were in groups getting set up. The late children then had to deal with coats/bags/lunch boxes and water bottles. Then they had to find out what groups they were in. It held the class up.

It's really not fair on everyone else to be repeatedly late.

I should imagine if there is a school trip somewhere exciting that requires them to be on time, they'll manage that day.

Trifleorbust · 24/03/2017 13:13

Maybe they have a reason. Maybe this has been arranged with the school. You don't know, so wind in neck, eh?

Hellmouth · 24/03/2017 13:15

I only have one DS. He's only 8 months old. I'm still late to everything, even when he's not with me lol.

Now that's worth ranting about

MissGoggins · 24/03/2017 13:18

One post from op... and we are still replying to this judgemental shite. (I see the irony, thank you!)

What did op think - a flow of, "I know, right" and "fucking scum of the earth, no less!" style comments?

Of course YABU op.

Get polishing:

Bluntness100 · 24/03/2017 13:19

n his head if you have to be somewhere at 9am you leave at 9am. Some people are wired diffently

That's not being wired differently though that's being obtuse. Are you saying if he had to be at the doctors for 3 he'd leave at 3 and miss his appointment? If he starts work at 9 he'd leave at 9 and be late for work? If he was getting married at 1 he'd leave at 1 and be late for his own wedding? If he had a two hour commute and had to be someplace by 12 he'd leave at 12 and be two hours late?

If the answer to those is no, then he was simply choosing to be late for the school run. There is no wired differently about it. If the answer is yes, then there is bigger issues at play and being "wired differently " is a kind way to say it.

stoopido · 24/03/2017 13:24

I am too busy trying to get my own children into school without worrying about and judging others.

bibbitybobbityyhat · 24/03/2017 13:24

Yanbu op.

The "mind your own business" replies on this thread are laughable.

Sirzy · 24/03/2017 13:29

There is a family who are always 20 min early and make the child stand in front of the class fir that ling so she could be first in.

This could be us. Ds is autistic and can't stand the crowd at the door. He likes to get to school early so he can be first in. Getting there early also means that he isn't late if we have trouble getting him to school as it gives us time to play with

(Or does in general. Today he was 30 mins late for school because of Red Nose Day and him not being able to cope with the changes!)

Naturebabe · 24/03/2017 13:34

I feel sorry for the poor family judgeypants! I'm sure they will feel your eyes booring into them, adding to the stress. Find something else to think about!

NerrSnerr · 24/03/2017 13:36

Why are you so worried about what this family are doing? Why are you bothered?

I'm also curious why it's obvious the mum doesn't drive? If other people on the school run have the mum doing the driving every day does that make you think it's obvious the dad doesn't drive?

ILoveDolly · 24/03/2017 13:39

It's none of your business. You have no idea what their mornings are like or what they do. Every single child extra you add to the equation (and dad as well in this case) is another person to be ready on time too, I might point out.

ImFuckingSpartacus · 24/03/2017 13:39

The chances of 3 children in a family having "quite severe sensory issues" is tiny

Some posters don't manage to finish a whole thought before they paw at the keyboard to give their opinion, do they?

Don't you think ONE child with issues is enough to make everyone late? Or do you think somehow the other 2 small children could drive themselves to school to be on time?

ImFuckingSpartacus · 24/03/2017 13:40

The "mind your own business" replies on this thread are laughable

Laughable? Or so bloody obvious it shouldn't need saying? Anything other than mind your own business is laughable (in an at you, not with you way, tbc).

SpongeBobJudgeyPants · 24/03/2017 13:44

Where is the OP?

Curlyshabtree · 24/03/2017 13:44

There are dozens of families like this at our school. They don't drive and have to navigate public transport or long walks in all weathers with more than one child. Our school work with the families to offer assistance if it's required. Not everyone is well organised!
FWIW I doubt the kids in class are disrupted, I know mine aren't.

PortiaCastis · 24/03/2017 13:45

It's easy to sit in judgement but as my Gran used to say
You are not qualified to criticise others unless you're perfect yourself and no bugger is perfect

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