To think 41 is v v young for a granny??

[TinfoilHattie]

I'm 44. Recently I have been back in touch with some people I was at school with on Facebook - haven't seen these people for over 20 years, nearer 25 probably. I'm quite surprised at the number who are already grandparents - I saw a picture of a toddler on one of their FB pages, assumed it was their child but no, a grandchild having their third birthday. Granny is the same age as me.

My mum was 27 when she had me and became a grandparent at 58. My inlaws were the same age. My eldest is 14 and I am not expecting to be a granny much before I'm 60, so that's my "normal". Cannot imagine being a granny by 41 and may be a bit unreasonable thinking it's nothing to aspire to?

It would be perfectly legal to be a grandparent at 32. Hope that helps.

I had my DD at 18, she's 18 now and thankgod she's at uni and didn't follow in my footsteps. My youngest is 3, I couldn't imagine someone calling me "granny" at this age.

MIL became a granny at 40. It's great, she and FIL can run around after the grandchildren, help with childcare and are very active in their lives and thoroughly enjoy it. I think they'd feel like they'd missed out had it all happened later in their life.

My DM was 17 when she had me. I was 23 when I had DS1. He is now 30, recently married and planning to have a baby in a couple of years, all being well, so I'm expecting to become a DGM in my mid-late 50s. I think trends like this are changing over time, but obviously being a teen mum brought the average down in our family.

It's not unreasonable to think. But it's not all that realistic to be shocked as many people do become mums around 19/20/21 so Granny at 40 ish isn't all that shocking.

I made my mum a granny at 41. I'm hoping I can leave my 30's before it happens to me.

I know it would be legal to be a grandparent at 32. I'm not daft. But it's really not the norm, is it? I don't know anyone who is a grandparent in their 30s. And then it gets into the whole debate of whether children of 16 getting pregnant and their children repeating the cycle is what our society wants to be encouraging.

"It's regional"? What does that mean?

That statistically some regions have younger first time mums than others :)

My Dad was in a chip shop once when the a woman burst into tears because she was going to be a Granny at 29!!!!

Thinking about it, my Mum was a granny at 33.

So do you think all sixteen year olds should be at college, OP?

Plenty of nineteen/twenty year olds aren't at university, have no intention of going to university and are quite happy

My friends mum became a nan at 34

I became a nanny at 40. Loved it, had so much more energy than with the later grandchildren who came along in my 50s and 60s.

I just turned 40 (literally, this past Monday) and my eldest is 18. I could be a grandmother. I have friends from high school who have grandchildren. My mother was 30 when I was born, so in my experience grandparents are older, in their 60s.

One of my friends from school was a grandmother at 44 and I thought that was young, but then she was married very young and had her first child at 21.

I'm 52, had my first at 29 and my DC are nowhere near having children themselves yet. My own DM became a grandmother at 57, and my MIL was 65.

The youngest grandparent I've known was someone DH used to work with, who became a grandad at 35. His daughter was born when he was 18, and she had a child at 17.

I think years ago it would have been even more usual, my Grandad became a Grandad at 42 and a Great at 60. Now at 90+ he is lucky enough to be a Great Great.

I think it's all about what you're used to in your family. My mum had me at 22, I had my 1st at 22 and my DD had her 1st at 20 so I was 42 when I became a grandmother. Co-incidentally we all have had husbands at least 10 years older than ourselves.........I have truly and genuinely loved every second of it, and now have 3 of them at the grand old age of 46. I personally think it is very much something to aspire to - it's like doing it all over again with patience, grace and wisdom!! My DD lives in the same village, I see the children nearly every day and they have a bedroom here as well as every toy and gadget known to man (possible the only downside I could mention!!). I can't imagine my mum coping with being a grandmother now she's 69 - she adores being a great grandmother though. Christmas Day was an utter joy having a house full of children again, and it's not only the lower classes that have children young as some seem to be declaring .

People have children young tend to go on to have grandchildren young.

My sister became a nan when she was 42.

I'm 46, my children are 20&22 and have no desire to settle down or have children. Lots of my old school friends are grandparents, though.

DH is 52, he's desperate to be a grandad!

So do you think all sixteen year olds should be at college, OP?

I think 16 year olds should be doing something constructive with their lives. It's a VERY rare 16 year old who has the financial means and is independent enough to be able to raise a child without depending wholly on state support. By 19 or 20 a young person may be in a steady job with a steady relationship and those 3 or 4 years makes a massive difference.

But no, I don't think 16 year olds having babies is ideal. Would be gutted if any of mine thought that was a good choice at such a young age.

I made my MIL a grandmother at 45. MIL and I have 6 degrees between us and are both professionals and live in homes we respectively own. We both married our childhood sweethearts. However, I do like the implication up thread that our location, income and social circles are somehow determined by the ages we chose to reproduce. I shall tell MIL.

Worse things happen at sea OP.

They really do.

By its regional you know exactly what she's saying.

A friend of mine became a granny at 37 & again at 40.

She had her eldest son when she was 17.