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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Oh fucking hell its a parking one..

391 replies

Emster58 · 19/03/2017 14:59

Tell me please what fresh hell is this?

Of course there is a backstory but it culminated with dh being threatened today Sad

We live on a new housing estate, we share the entrance to our driveway with two other families....
We have owned the house for 8 years but it has been rented out while we've been abroad. We just recently moved back and discovered that no one now living here is aware that it is in fact a shared entrance but not a shared drive. The parking has been pretty bad and I've had to knock on my ndn1's about 5 times to be able to leave my property as she was parked on it. Interestingly enough this seems to piss my neighbor off Confused
I had been getting some building work done, it took about 6 weeks. I informed my neighbors beforehand and wouldn't allow work after 6pm in order to not put the neighbors out to much.
A truck dented my neighbours (2) fence i got it fixed immediately and was mortified and apologetic.
A delivery truck was blocking the exit once by about 5 inches and my neighbor 1 went batshit at me in the street. It was the same neighbor who was consistently blocking me in and i was only ever nice & polite to her when she was on my propertyHmm
My ndn2 stood out on the drive with her dh and dm and shouted over to my gardeners that i was a disgrace for having building materials on ndn1's drive.

Still with me?

When the work was finished i took round wine and a card to both neightbours (i also arranged to get their windows washed to clean any builders dust)and thanked them for their patience. In the card i attached a photo copy of the property boundaries for their information and so they would realise that they were in fact parking on my drive and that I wasn't storing property on ndn1's drive that it was in fact my
property.

So that's the back story ... now this is where it starts to get nasty.
Just to make things better we live opposite a school.
Sometimes a random blocks the drive entrance and uses it as a parking space. Last week i lost my rag and put a note on the windscreen with Pratt stick saying RUDE - this isn't a parking space. (Fucking bastarding mumsnet giving me these ideas)..anyway turns out it was ndn2's visitor...I didn't know Blush ...it made no sense, why would he park blocking when the neighbor had 2 spaces on his drive???
Anyway the ndn 2 stopped speaking to us (which really is ok because they were never very nice to us anyway), but unfortunately they added in talking about us loudly so we overhear , stink eyeing us, ignoring us when we greet them....sort of a pack mentality when they have. Visitors...sort of low level intimidation but very unpleasant.
The council put in keep clear signs at our drive entrance yesterday - i requested them about 6 months ago. The ndn2 has gone apoplectic. Now they don't park on their drive at all, they are parking both cars at the entrance to make it difficult for us to leave.
They've now set up toys for their D.C. On the entrance so we would have to ask the D.C. To move them temporarily while we exit.which we did, politely of course...
This has resulted in non dh going mental 'squaring up" pointing in my dh's face calling him names, taunting him, telling him hit me hit me go on...my chest just kept very calm with his hands behind his back....ndn's poor poor ds was crying terribly it was awful begging him to "leave it dad please"....when people walked by the ndn doh cuddled his boy and said to my dh...look what you've done to my poor boy you're scaring him Shock....
I have no idea how to deal with this situation.

Any help please?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
wizzywig · 19/03/2017 18:47

They are going to feel so stoopid when they realise its a shared driveway. They have been utter dickheads

Original poster
Emster58 · 19/03/2017 19:39

The police went but they weren't in so they will visit tomorrow.
The officer encouraged us to mediate. I agreed.
TBH i just want them to leave us alone now.

They are not going to stop twat parking I've reconciled myself with that, they're just not evolved enough to accept that their behaviour is anti social.

All i want is them to stop shouting, stop stink eyeing us and stop threatening us.

Aibu to expect the minimum of civility?

OP posts:
BillyButtfuck · 19/03/2017 19:45

YANBU to just want your neighbours to not be abusive towards you. They bare minimum is for them to just blank you but how they are acting is appalling, especially as they are completely in the wrong.

HaPPy8 · 19/03/2017 20:00

Am i the only one who doesn't understand the picture at all?

GlitteryFluff · 19/03/2017 20:08

They sound like arse holes.
Hopefully the police can calm them a bit.

BillyButtfuck · 19/03/2017 21:17

Happy the dotted bits are their driveway/parking areas and the orange lines outline their boundaries.
The keep clear is the access to their shared access off the public highway

(I think)

Original poster
Emster58 · 19/03/2017 21:21

Buttfuck-

You are correct Grin

OP posts:
BillyButtfuck · 19/03/2017 21:24

If you're anywhere near Bournemouth I'd happily come and park on their driveway for you, see how they like to be on the receiving end of twatty parkers Wink

Drawward · 19/03/2017 21:46

I do sympathise with you about their behaviour but the passive aggressiveness of attaching a copy of the deeds in a thank you card would have got my back up. you should have separated the two things one sending a thank you card for putting up with the building work and two having a chat with them with the plans and sorting everything out. Glad to see you have the Police in now and hope that it all clams down after a friendly chat from them.

Original poster
Emster58 · 19/03/2017 21:47

Sheesh...i wish buttfuck ...the moral high ground is a lonely place.Star

OP posts:
Original poster
Emster58 · 19/03/2017 21:53

I know what you mean drawward, i did consider the possibility that it may appear pa. I did write a lovely note and added a Wink to keep it gentle. They had been shouting at my gardeners saying i was a disgrace, I believed that there was no way they could realise that it was my property otherwise why would they do that? So i took the opportunity in the softest way available to me. They are not very communicative and the very rare time i had to knock their door ignored me. This has happened twice so i knew they wouldn't appreciate a conversation.

OP posts:
Sedona123 · 19/03/2017 22:27

Your neighbours are completely batshit. I can't see why on earth they would even want to park where they are currently parking, or why they would want their kids to play there either!

Have you checked the written part of your deeds? I would imagine that not parking on or obstructing the shared driveway will be mentioned on there too.

I would say that at this point you are already in dispute with your neighbours and it is worth pursuing this matter until they stop their twatty parking at the access area too. Otherwise, if you do decide to sell up and they're still parking there, that will put off potential buyers.

Cherrysoup · 19/03/2017 22:39

Log everything. Get cctv pointing down the drive. Call the police every single time you feel intimidated. These wankers need a lesson.

Tapandgo · 19/03/2017 22:42

Problem is - the more you complain, it can make selling your house difficult in the future as you gave to declare neighbour problems at that level.
You can't reason with thugs.
Get CCTV and as long as your drive isn't blocked, just go in and out as if it doesn't bother you .

TheMaddHugger · 20/03/2017 03:29

Get Roads and / or council to make that entrance to the street a NO Parking Zone.

Good Luck OP

picklemepopcorn · 20/03/2017 06:49

Who owns the shared entrance area? Is it jointly owned? Would all three of you have to agree to any changes to it?

Do they need to keep their drive clear for some reason, garage access perhaps? Maybe they'll get bored of parking further from their house than they need to.

We had abusive neighbours. Swore over the fence at us, squirted the dog with the hose pipe, yelled at kids outside. I think she was hungover all the time. We all raised a cheer when they left!

chicaguapa · 20/03/2017 07:29

Don't forget that the ndn will have to declare the dispute too when selling so it's worth pointing that out to them if they're so intent on escalating it and acting like dicks.

IvyLeagueUnderTheSea · 20/03/2017 07:33

Are you sure that you all actually own the shared driveway? Could it just be that you all just have right of way over it?

ophiotaurus · 20/03/2017 07:50

That's a good point chic. I wold point this out to them.

Original poster
Emster58 · 20/03/2017 09:10

I would like to apologise again for the terrible spellings, my dh has had a read through and said he was going to start a new thread, AIBU to initiate divorce proceedings due to my wife's terrible grammar? Grin

The neighbors do not need to keep their driveway clear for any reason.
They have not been parking on the access road since we moved back although I believe they did before.
They returned home from wherever they were on Saturday to great big keep clear signs painted on our shared access. This has enraged them and i suspect the now parking there to make things difficult is a great big fuck you to us.
We requested the keep clear when we first moved back as we are on a school road most of our neighbors shared access have it but for whatever reason our home was overlooked initially.
Our neighbors behaviour towards us has deteriorated towards us recently and the writing is the cherry on the cake for them..i think. This is the problem I don't know? They appear to have taken it personally but its not directed towards them but to the school parkers.
The council owns our access road.
I just cant see this ending well.
Even this morning ndn2 dear wife unnecessarily drove her car right up to mine while staring at me, they appear to be desperate for us to react.
I mean as if the violent display yesterday wasn't enough..why continue it?
The police visit today i suspect will enrage them more.

OP posts:
BillyButtfuck · 20/03/2017 09:44

I hate them for you. Make sure you keep your phone on you to record / photo / video any further interactions

GabsAlot · 20/03/2017 10:23

can ndn1 not back you up with the police? surely 2 against one wold hold more sway

i agree about cctv especially if shes riving right up to your house staring

AwaywiththePixies27 · 20/03/2017 10:34

Jesus wept! They all sound as batshit and entitled as each other! Also one of the reasons why if I ever come into money to buy my own house I'm moving into one in the middle of nowhere where there won't be neighbours for miles!

it made no sense, why would he park blocking when the neighbor had 2 spaces on his drive???

I dont know why people do this either. Lots of the neighbours block their own empty drives off with their cars around here and I don't get it either. It can invalidate their insurance too doing this I believe, my Ex's friend once had to fork out a fortune, the insurance refused to pay out when his car got clipped as on his policy he'd stated he keeps it on the driveway but he'd blocked his own drive off that night when another car crashed into his.

Get the police involved OP. Threatening behaviour is never okay.

AwaywiththePixies27 · 20/03/2017 10:37

AIBU to initiate divorce proceedings due to my wife's terrible grammar?

Yes. It's Mumsnet not a game of Scrabble. Typos come as standard nowadays well my posts are usually littered with them anyway. I'm on your side OP. I can't spell either Grin

AwaywiththePixies27 · 20/03/2017 10:39

The officer encouraged us to mediate

Not when they're bloody squaring up to others you don't. That kind of behaviour had gone way past mediation IMO.