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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be gutted by my sons comment?

160 replies

ThatWhiteElephant · 17/03/2017 19:32

So on Sunday I'll be in town. Son (14) will be in town too, with his friends.
Just got told by son "if you see me on Sunday with my friends don't talk to me and just ignore me."
Gobsmacked I am!
Are all teenaged boys like this?

OP posts:
70isaLimitNotaTarget · 17/03/2017 19:56

Usually though it's the friends who say "Oh is that your Mum" and your DC has to pretend "Never seen her before in my life" Grin

Doyouthinktheysaurus · 17/03/2017 19:56

Normal ime.

Dh and I happened to arrive near home just as ds1 (14) was using the crossing at the end of our street so of course I waved madly at him and called his name. His first words when we got out the car were "I hate you"Grin

WaegukSaram · 17/03/2017 19:56

You need to dress up eccentrically (channel Edwina from AbFab) and then greet him extravagantly when you see him in town, with lots of "my sweet darling!"s and squelchy kisses.

Cookingongas · 17/03/2017 19:56

Normal imo. He's not trying to hurt you. He's trying to fit in.

I also think it's horrible to go out of your way to tease and torment your dc at this age like some pp have suggested.

I remember being a teenager. It's brutal and , at least in my school, dog eat dog. Other teenagers will use any difference, any weakness, any potential to take the piss. It's mob rule and it's not a "fun" thing to throw your own dc under the proverbial bus. So glad I'm not a teenager any more.

Bestthingever · 17/03/2017 19:57

I have two teenage boys (17 and 14) who definitely consider themselves part of the 'cool' crowd. Whenever I've bumped into them when they're out with their mates, they've been happy to see me and have usually left their mates to chat for a minute. I think your ds is rude.

wigglesrock · 17/03/2017 19:57

Meh I still feel that way about my mum and I'm 42. Tell him not to be so bloody rude and then do as he asks.

SparklyUnicornPoo · 17/03/2017 19:59

He got to 14 before you got a comment like that? you are obviously less embarrassing than me!

Someone22 · 17/03/2017 20:00

I went to see a band with my teenage son. When we came out there was a queue of people waiting for the late session. My son said hello to his mates and said "so this is my mum". One of his friends whispered nice arse, which totally made my day.

SleepingBooty · 17/03/2017 20:00

Yes, completely normal. Parents are incredibly embarrassing to teenagers, it's just part of the growing up process, don't take it personally Smile

chocatoo · 17/03/2017 20:00

Rude! A small nod and smile is in order.

Annesmyth123 · 17/03/2017 20:01

Normal. I was banned from town on a Friday afternoon at one point. 😂

Witchend · 17/03/2017 20:01

Missing word:

who knew nothing.

Witchend · 17/03/2017 20:01

x-posted by about 50 people so it doesn't make sense!

RebootYourEngine · 17/03/2017 20:03

I would totally do everything to run into him and embarrass him. Grin

NavyandWhite · 17/03/2017 20:05

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

donajimena · 17/03/2017 20:08

I don't think he is being rude. He's just embarrassed by your existence.
I have a 13 nearly 14 year old who I blank in the street (his request) sometimes I need to give him money on the way to school after going to the cashpoint and its performed with the stealth of a drug exchange.

problembottom · 17/03/2017 20:08

Ah that's normal. I used to hang around my local bowling alley when I was 13. My lovely dad used to come and pick me and my friends up and was told to STAY in the car and text me when he arrived.

I remember once he ignored this and walked right up to me when we were chatting to some BOYS which when you go to a girls' school is a big event. It was hugely traumatic!

SuperBeagle · 17/03/2017 20:09
Grin

He'll have grown out of it in a couple of years.

Yep, teenagers in general are a strange species. Hurtful, often without realising it (and often in the pursuit of taking a bit more control over their lives). But most of them have returned to a form of normality by 16-18.

TheFirstMrsDV · 17/03/2017 20:10

cooking people are joking about the 'tormenting'
I am not joking about the telling him he is rude and hurtful though.
Lots of things are 'normal' in childhood.
Wanting to climb on top of the wardrobe is normal but stop our kids doing it and why they shouldn't.

The teenage years are like the toddler years in lots of ways. So many things to learn, lots of rapid growth.
They need tolerance and guidance.

DevelopingDetritus · 17/03/2017 20:11

Yes they are. On the rare occasion I was on the bus with my son, he'd seat on a different seat.

LivelyLima · 17/03/2017 20:12

yep, i got it earlier though ...

i am also not allowed to be friendly to his friends, so i keep it in check.

but i get it. its his "world" - inner and outer - he's creating. its wonderful, its important. back off is what we have to do ...

thegoatwhogotthequiche · 17/03/2017 20:12

Entirely normal. I learnt the hard way and saw the son of a very good freind when out...I made the MASSIVE social faux pas of acknowledging him. It was an 'OMG please make the ground open up NOW moment for him'. It wasn't great for me either TBH but it was NEVER ever spoken about we got over it.

Oblomov17 · 17/03/2017 20:12

Totally normal. Ha ha. Just the 'embarrassed phase'.

AdoraBell · 17/03/2017 20:13

OP that could have been my 15 yr old DD talking. And she tells me she loves me and I'm the best many times a day, when we're at home.

MilkRunningOutAgain · 17/03/2017 20:14

My DS stomps off many metres in front of us on the rare occasions we are in town together, with my DD and me trailing behind giggling about it. It has never occurred to me to be offended, it's funny ! DD and I tease him too, he is 14.