Husbands ex has stolen baby name

[Deedee3311]

his ex who he already has a son with who has just had a baby has actually stolen the name we were going to use. We are on amicable terms and she knew what name we had chosen, now she has robbed it. We call the baby by this name and it is THE name we want, but his son can't have two sisters called the same thing can he?! Livid.

I have a Milo, a Mila, a Mia and a Miro in the family... Also 3 Floras, 2 Marias, two Matildas... Oh, also 2 Brunos, 2 "Giros", At least 2 Francescos, 3 Monicas, 2 Lucas...

It really isn't confusing or anything. So, I personally think you can certainly use the name again.

No way would I give my child that name now. But there are so many beautiful names in the world, surely you can think of another one

I would use the name anyway.

I'd find this upsetting. Is it an unusual name though or is it a top five name where every other child is called that? If it's unusual I'd think they've done it on purpose but if it's something like Ava which is everywhere I'd be inclined to think they were always thinking of that (and I'd call my child something else anyway.)

I know a man whose half brother has the same name as him. Story is he was adopted at birth,then he traced his birth mother as an adult and fund she had a sn it's the same name. She'd thought she'd not see first on again. They all see each other and it's jut a funny story.OP, your story can be Ex used your name but you still love it, so that's why. So what.

Crap edit. Sorry. Need to get used to spellcheck.

It shows you aren' t letting ex bully you, which is how it looks unless she had no idea of your plan.

Deedee3311 what a pity no wonder you're seething but what's done is done.
I really think a new name is required.
Have you asked on the Baby Name section for ideas, (maybe use a different MN name for that).
I just hope she hasn't stolen the middle name as well.
Don't hold your breath.

Of course one can't own a name, but whenever these threads appear I always think it would irritate me immensely. However, it does rather depend on the name- pick a common traditional or trendy name and good chance somebody else will, but I do remember a thread where someone had both really unusual first and middle names 'stolen' which was a bit weird.

what a nasty and bitchy thing to do, YANBU.

Now it's up to you, either you love the name so much you stick with it, and ignore her. Or you pick something else you like. She obviously hasn't really let go of her ex, so that should cheer you up, that she hasn't move forward yet and is still spiteful.

I have seen worst, when the ex wife stole the baby's name, to give it to her new puppy.

Of course, unless the name is her mother or grand-mother's name and has a special significance for her. It is always possible she is not spiteful but then she should have mentioned it when you told her your name.

And this is why you never tell anybody a name until you've actually named your baby.

You don't own a name.
I learnt the hard way and won't share any future baby names when pregnant because of this

Of course he can have two sisters with the same name

Don't do that to the poor kid! Bad enough he has parents both having new babies at the same time and arguing over names, don't give them both the same bloody name, that would be cruel!!

So, let me get this right. Your dp is having 2 baby girls within a few months. And you're all friends? Perhaps you're not as friendly as you thought! Was your dp still with this woman when you came on the scene?

Nope, try again! its the dp's ex having a baby with someone else.

Use the name anyway. No one owns a name. You will find a way of differentiating between the two

That is really bad. I would call
Her out on it end of.

Maybe she had already had her heart set on the name? How did she even know what name you were planning to call the baby?

nobody really owns a name though they? Think you might be being a like bit silly and precious

I would want to have a different name. It's annoying but unfortunately no one owns a name.
Its prob always best not to tell people your names but even if you hadn't told anyone someone else close to you could still use name before you, it's just one of those things.

a little not a like - sorry! Stupid autocorrect

That's what you get for telling people the name before the baby comes. Irks me no end when people do this.

I can't stand this sniffy 'nobody owns a name' attitude. The ex knew that OP had her heart set on the name and she used it anyway. Fine, OP shouldn't have told her but it was bloody nasty of the ex and I'd be raging too.

Regardless of the 'stealing' issue, you simply can't give your daughter the same name as your son's sister. If the step son already had a sister called Mary, and you were pregnant and told people you wanted to call the child Mary, posters here would tell you not to. It doesn't change things that both pregnancies were at the same time, or that she may have 'stolen' the name. It is unfair and confusing to your stepson to put him in the position of having two sisters Mary. He would likely have to explain his family situation every time he mentioned his two sisters. I can understand your feelings of annoyance and frustration but unfortunately you really need to choose another name. On these type of threads, I regularly say it's fine to call the baby the same name as your cousin, or sister, or friend or colleague's baby but this really is different.

She used it first so actually you'd be the one stealing the name. You should have kept it to yourself but now I'd pick something else.

Why would you tell your husband's ex wife your potential baby name?