Husbands ex has stolen baby name

[Deedee3311]

his ex who he already has a son with who has just had a baby has actually stolen the name we were going to use. We are on amicable terms and she knew what name we had chosen, now she has robbed it. We call the baby by this name and it is THE name we want, but his son can't have two sisters called the same thing can he?! Livid.

[TowerRavenSeven]

Yanbu to be annoyed but honestly you can't steal a name. I suggest to anyone if the name you pick is so precious to you then don't tell it to any one until after you give birth!

[ADishBestEatenCold]

When is your baby due, OP? Do you know that you are also expecting a girl?

I think I'd be inclined to choose another name, but I think I'd be inclined to first say to her,
"isn't that lovely, DSS will have two sisters with the same name! Is that why you decided to choose the same name as us? So that DSS will only have to learn one name?"

[user1487941567]

My DH's family have two sets of brothers with the same name - they are adamant they are not the same as there is one letter different in each case - and they don't seem to mind. Although I'd be peeved too tbh.

[MerryMarigold]

So, let me get this right. Your dp is having 2 baby girls within a few months. And you're all friends? Perhaps you're not as friendly as you thought! Was your dp still with this woman when you came on the scene?

[ButtercupChain]

Too many people think they own a name!!!

My neighbour is expecting her first baby (a girl) and wants to call her Olivia. Her cousin had a baby last week ... You can guess what she called her. Yep, OLIVIA.

My neighbour is now being TOLD by the aunt that she cannot/must not call her baby (due in July,) Olivia. She is really upset and is trying to pick another name. I said tell them to fuck off. (And still call the baby Olivia!)

[PurpleDaisies]

merry the op doesn't say her husband is the father of the ex's baby, only that she's had s baby and used the name she chose.

[NewPuppyMum]

User148 - what is the name?

[Blessedwithboys]

I'd be annoyed If I had my heart set on it but I'd use the name anyway. Can I ask what it was?

[alltouchedout]

Ooh. I can see why you feel annoyed and upset, if she knew what name you were planning. I suppose it depends on the relationship between her and your dp, but she could have let you know she was also planning on using the name.
I'd still use the name, tbh. Especially if it has a variety of nicknames (if nicknames is the right word, I mean like Elizabeth can be known as Liz, Lizzie, Beth, Betty, etc). Or I'd keep it as a middle name at least.

[SusieOwl4]

Or just chose another name and tell her you thought the original name was too common. So you changed your mind. No offence intended 🙂

[cementedminds]

YANBU OP. I went to see a pregnant acquaintance when I was nearly 9 months pregnant and she was 8 months pregnant. I told her in confidence what we had finally decided to call the baby - they had a shortlist but hadn't decided. The next morning I got a text, she had gone into labour, had the baby and used the first and second names we had chosen, neither of which had been on her shortlist of 10 names!

As the boys were going to end up in the same class/year at a small village school and we had a lot of mutual friends I didn't feel like I could use the names any more. Had it been a coincidence then fair enough but we had taken nearly nine months to finally agree on a name we liked and she was fucking cheeky to use it within 24hrs of our conversation as well!

However DS2 is now 7 and I love the names we chose instead. But I would always advise keeping it to yourself until the announcement, it happens so often - plus clearly there are a lot of people (even on this thread) who can't see the issue with it!

I remember swearing 'FUCK off you are taking the piss' at my phone, didn't say a word to her but she knew perfectly well what she had done, silly cow.

[user1487941567]

Osman and Ozman.

[Chickendipper12]

This is a little ridiculous.
It happened to me with my oldest. A girl I mildly knew had a baby and gave the baby a very pretty greek name I didnt know she was pregnant never mind what she called the baby as I say I somewhat knew her.
A few months later I have my daughter and I called her Athena. Not because of the goddess, not because its greek but because I heard it on a tv programme and loved the name.
Anyway I live in a somewhat small horrible town and of course it went round I "stole" this girls baby name.
Just to clarify she didnt call her kid Athena or anything close to it but you know.
It really pissed me off!
Anyway the point is how many people in your town that name? Were did you hear the name in the first place? Because by your logic the name is stolen in the first place. Suck it up, keep the name or dont but noone has stolen the name. Either that or we are all name stealers.

Did you even ask her what she planned to call her baby? She could of had the name picked all along and just was not daft enough to share it.

[paxillin]

Never tell anyone ever the name until the birth has been registered. I'd still use it, she knew what she was doing, so knew there was a risk she'd have the same name as her sister.

[Topseyt]

I would use the name anyway. Why the hell not?

Don't let it rile you. Of course he can have two half sisters with the same name. I would refuse to let it be an issue.

[OVienna]

Of course it's bloody irritating.

[Whocansay]

I can't believe you knew she was pregnant and were daft enough to tell her!

Are both of these babies his or is this an ex from a while ago?

[MsJudgemental]

DH's father was one of 13 and 2 of his full sisters had the same name, but were called the equivalent of Big Rose and Little Rose! The first bit referrred to their size, not age!

[Chickendipper12]

The shine isnt the name its the baby.

If she likes the name it shouldnt make a difference the baby wont get any less shine because another baby has the same name

[NoFuckingRoomOnMyBroom]

Maybe your baby wont suit the name when you see it?
Pretty silly to tell anyone your intended name, more so if they are also pregnant.

[LEELULUMPKIN]

No help whatsoever but never ever tell before hand. I was lucky as I didn't have a clue what to call my DS until I saw him for the first time after giving birth which was 3 weeks later as I was in a coma in icu. Poor DH just stuck with Baby M (surname) until I was concious.

I know you must be peeved but there are so many lovely names out there, maybe just focus on your own baby who will be totally unique & loved whatever name he/she ends up with.

[AnoiseAnnoysanOyster]

This is why you don't talk about names, with anyone.

[FrenchDucksSayCoinCoin]

You know those horrible Icebreakers at work events, where you have to say your name and role and an interesting fact about yourself? Well, this little boy will have a great one.... "Hi, my name is Tom, I'm regional head of important stuff and my sisters are both called Anna."
The girls aren't related to each other, if your heart is set on that name, use it. Though, I admit I would be pretty annoyed too.