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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think you shouldn't go to a birthday party you're not invited to

166 replies

Robinnaaa · 05/03/2017 09:25

I paid for my sons birthday party at a soft play centre. The soft play don't do exclusive hire parties so you have the party at the same time as the soft play is open.

They close the soft play centre at 5:30pm and that when the children's character (well a member of staff dressed as one) come out and dance with the child/play games with them and give out prizes.

At 5:30pm everyone left as thats the closing time. Some people take about 15 mins to leave. Except one mum with what looked like a three year old child.

She went to put his coat on when 'chase' from paw patrol came running out to greet the children. Her son almsost died from excitement!

He came running over and danced, sang and played party games with our birthday party group!

After chase left she made him out his coat on and left.

But I thought this was quite cheeky! He wasn't invited to the party and I'd paid for that entertainment. She also should have left at 5:30pm as that the closing time of the soft play.

Everyone was wondering who this random child was and he won the pass the parcel game and got the toy!!!!!

His mum didn't seem to see any issue and sat looking proudly as he joined in the fun!

I've name changed for fear I'm being truly awful here. But I was slightly miffed!

AIBU?

OP posts:
EsmeeMerlin · 05/03/2017 09:38

Would have allowed the boy to join in

lampshady · 05/03/2017 09:39

I wouldn't have minded at all - three year old are just, well, three. I couldn't begrudge making a three year old's day and how excited they'd be.

Flowersonthewall · 05/03/2017 09:48

Well he didn't come to the whole party! He is 3 I bet seeing chase must have made his day! She gave the parcel back. I don't see the problem. Yabu.

BhajiAllTheWay · 05/03/2017 09:50

If this had been my child I would have let him have his moment with the character but then taken him out. She must've realised surely!?

Nicpem1982 · 05/03/2017 09:52

I wouldn't have minded I also couldn't have had the ptp back

listsandbudgets · 05/03/2017 09:52

A 3 year old wanting to see Chase and joining in a bit of dancing wouldn't have bothered me at all.

However, I think I'd have said something to the mother when the games started telling her it was a private party and you'd be grateful if she left now

Oh and I'm a big softy, so if I was sure I had a spare party bag I might have given one to her DC -to underline the fact its time to go now--

I bet that 3 year old still has a big grin on his face that he got to meet Chase -parties are about making people happy after all :)

Astoria7974 · 05/03/2017 09:52

Most soft-plays have parties during opening hours. However the good ones keep the food/games bit out of sight of the other kids.

Nocabbageinmyeye · 05/03/2017 09:54

She gave the present back, talk about a dripfeed!!

Deadsouls · 05/03/2017 09:57

Seems quite petty of you OP. What would be wrong with welcoming the child, and letting him enjoy himself. It sounds like they did. You said he was so excited, why get resentful about it? It's one child and you'd already paid anyway, it's not like you were paying extra

Aderyn2016 · 05/03/2017 09:59

I think you are being mean. It didn't cost you anything - she gave the present back ffs.

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 05/03/2017 10:02

Aw bless him I think you're being a tad mean, soft play are asking for it really sending a giant Chase out where there's toddlers Grin

boobah23 · 05/03/2017 10:03

I agree that is a bit cheeky, and if it was my child I would have picked them up and removed them! But as the party mum I probably would've thought it was quite funny. Grin It kind of reminds me of when my daughter was very small and we were in the park. A family was sitting on the grass nearby having a picnic and dd just sat down with them like she was supposed to be there. And before I could remove her, they had given her a plate and some food!

MysweetAudrina · 05/03/2017 10:04

When my dd was 8, we had jungle Dave and his reptiles to our house and dd
invited all her class. In the middle of the drop offs a woman who i didn't recognise came to the door with her 4 year old son. She had a present for my dd and a card with her name on it. There were loads of 8 year olds arriving at the saw time. None of us knew him or her. I was in party mam mood and I just smiled and welcomed him in. He had a great time at the party and the mam collected him 2 hours later. We still have no idea who he was. All i can think of is that I got a digit wrong on one of the mobile numbers that I had for the other parents when I was sending out texts. He completely stood out in a house full of 30 8 year olds as he was tiny. When the mother collected him i said thanks for coming he had a great time. We still laugh about it.

I wouldn't have minded the toddler gate crashing it sounds like he got a kick out of it and as he gave the present back then no harm done.

Allthewaves · 05/03/2017 10:05

meh he was 3, she might not have realised when chase came out it was a private party then had a panic when he joined in the game. I prob would have give child party bag tbh. She gave back the toy so no harm really.

HaveCourageAndBeKind · 05/03/2017 10:12

YABU he was only three, obviously it made his day (week/life at that age?!) and she returned the present. I'd have welcomed the addition tbh because happy children feed my soul. I probably would have found a spare party bag too, I put whistles in them - that's punishment enough Grin

SuperFlyHigh · 05/03/2017 10:23

You're making this much fuss over a 3 year old? So he joined in, so wires were crossed?

Would you rather have a 3 year old getting upset if he was asked to leave, say goodbye to Chase (I've got no idea who Chase is!) etc?!

You sound very mean OP.

SuperFlyHigh · 05/03/2017 10:24

HaveCourage that's really kind of you re party bag, I'd have done same too. No skin off my nose.

HaveCourageAndBeKind · 05/03/2017 10:29

Not really, Super just any excuse to not take any bloody bags home for my own DC!

NoFuckingRoomOnMyBroom · 05/03/2017 10:30

Well that was a bit of a drip feed about the present wasn't it? Hmm
YABU, he was 3-she gave the present back, fail to see the problem really.

ineedamoreadultieradult · 05/03/2017 10:32

I think that the soft play place is the fault. Surely you don't start the private party bit until all non guests are out the area. I thibk you are being mean one 3 year old had a fantastic day at no expense to yourself. I wouldn't have minded at all.

Tiptoethr0ughthetulips · 05/03/2017 10:36

Jesus, he's 3! You wanted her to remove him kicking and screaming. The pass the parcel was cheeky but you can't blame the poor kid for being excited to see Chase.

ZackyVengeance · 05/03/2017 10:36

why didn't you tell the mother?

Bluntness100 · 05/03/2017 10:37

She gave the present to your son? Your op saying he "got the toy" was a bit misleading there....

I think you're being unreasonable here. It's one little three year old for good ness sake.

underneaththeash · 05/03/2017 10:38

Why didn't you just say something? If it was her first child, she probably didn't realise that it was a private party.

MamaMagellanic · 05/03/2017 10:39

There's bigger things to worry about than this! I'd have much rather let him have his moment than watched the mother wrestle a screaming toddler out just before bath&bed. Relax!