Is this an excessive amount for workplace money collection?

[StopBloodyClimbing]

One of my colleagues is getting married next month. We're a small team, there are only 8 of us. We works shifts and because of the days we work I have only worked a handful of shifts with the person who is getting married. I like them though, just haven't spent much time with them. The whole team get on okay buy we're not really friends, just colleuges.

Normally when we do a money collection for gifts it is about £5-10. It's only ever been for people leaving/having babies though, there hasn't been a wedding one before.

My manager has decided for this one we should all put in £35. I was . To me this is a lot of money at the moment. I work one or two short shifts a week for minimum wage, have two dc and am expecting dc3. Dp had recently had to take a pay cut so we are skint. £35 is pretty much a week's wages for me. My manager (bit of a bully and not at all approachable) keeps reminding me to bring in my money next week and reiterating the amount.

AIBU to think it's excessive? I genuinely don't know. A few years ago I would have just paid up no question but things are so tight at the moment I think that my judgement has been skewed somewhat.

Absolutely no way is anything over £15 maybe £20 at a push if you really really like them at all appropriate!

It's too much for most people to be able to afford, it's really embarrassing for the recipient and it makes it really difficult for anyone else that has birthdays/leaving days etc.

How did it go?

" I can't attend the wedding, so I'm giving _ her present before she goes on leave" put a £10 voucher in a card.

How can a boss dictate to staff what they should contribute? Darn cheek!

Exactly what Rubies12345 says.

This wouldn't wash on our office. People would just say "it's too much" and rightly so. Collections in our office are normally £1-2 for birthdays and maybe £5 for special occasions with the bosses usually putting in a tenner since they earn the big money

Your manager cannot make me contribute a certain amount. Just put in what you can afford and if anyone questions it just explain that you have other expenses this month. I was once expected contribute £15 for support staff Christmas presents when I was about 30. I felt this was excessive but did not speak up. I wish I had.

maybe suggest to manager the card could just be from those who contributed?

There were people in my office who didn't contribute to colleagues present, so their name didn't go on card. There wasn't any pressure, but if someone didn't get their contribution by a specific time, their name was 't on the card.

Simple.

Tenner max
Boss doesn't get to tell you what you might choose to give as a gift
"Sorry I cannot afford that" should cover it
Or, "I'll be giving my own gift to the wedding person so I won't be part of this whip round"
If he wants to give a fancy gift he should pay for it himself, or the company can decide to contribute.

OP I work for a bank and our whole team is pretty well paid and it would never be acceptable to ask people to donate this much. £10 max at your discretion usually and our head of department will often put in £20 or a bit more. £35 is way OTT. I would say you just can't afford it.

herself

StopBloodyClimbing

How did it go today OP?

It is a ridiculous amount. I'd have thought £10 each would've been more than adequate. Perhaps just contribute what you can and say that to him/her manager.

Disgusting!! You put in what you can afford, and only then if you can afford it!!

Nope nope nope!! That is what I spend on close adult relatives not a colleague! I am happy to chip in £1 for birthdays (we are a team of 36 so £35 per year) but last week was asked for £5 for a leaving present for someone I have never met or worked a shift with. 'Oh but she's worked here for years so you just have to!' Erm, nope. No one should dictate how much, or even if, you donate.

I also have a blanket ban on sponsorship. At least 3 forms a week go up in our staff room requesting we sponsor little johnnies cousins friend for a sponsored silence...it's easlier to say no to all

I wouldn't go above a fiver!
I'd never spend £35 on a colleague unless they were a close friend and I was actually going to the wedding!
Refuse. They can't force you to pay this.

That's ridiculous. Our PA recently put round a request from everyone for £20. I asked her to amend the request to delete the amount. For me and some of the other senior people
20 would be what we'd have done anyway, but for some of the more junior people I felt it was unreasonable.

35 is just bonkers!!!

bloody hell this is awful.

Hope OP comes back and tells us she whipped the arse of the manager.

Thats very excessive. The most i would ever add to a collection is a tenner and thats only for big occassions like retirement.

What was the outcome OP?

If you wanted a more face saving exit from the situation, might I suggest a cheery monday morning chat over coffee saying you've bought the perfect pressie for them...you spotted at the weekend and just had to buy it for them...but you dont want to appear mean so happy to chuck a £5/£10 in the works collection...I did this once for a colleague I didnt know at all ( different days ,different shifts our paths had never met)..felt the donation'asked' for was ridiculous for someone I'd never met.

Give ten pounds. x

Just say "sorry, I can't afford to join in with this, I will buy something on my own."

That's a hard one, you don't want to be known as the 'tight one'. It might be easier to just pay up in the long run. I'd love to think I'd stabs my ground and say it's too much but I reckon I'd cave and chip in the full amount!

I'd be suspicious of what the manager was actually spending the collection on. I'd want to see receipts.

It's YOUR money. Do what you want with it.
Do not give more than you can afford.
If Bertie big bollocks is so keen for you all to pay, he can top up your contribution.
I've been on min wage part time and it's impossible to pay that sort of money. Madness.