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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Would bunk beds for a parent and child be absolutely ridiculous?

230 replies

Woulditbesilly · 02/03/2017 10:30

Trying to work out logistics of having a baby/child in a flat with only one bedroom. There's a lounge, bathroom, TINY kitchen and bedroom. None of the rooms are large.

I was thinking of maybe having bunk beds in the bedroom but is this just stupid ... ?

OP posts:
BillSykesDog · 02/03/2017 19:23

It's really sad we're in a situation where someone on a decent salary is having to make these choices because housing is so expensive.

skerrywind · 02/03/2017 19:32

It's really sad we're in a situation where someone on a decent salary is having to make these choices because housing is so expensive.

But you don't know the reason, the Op won;'t say. She does she lives in a cheap area, earns a very good salary and that she has no mortgage. So in a better position than many.

OpalFruitsMarathonsandSpira · 02/03/2017 19:34

£80 hoodies Hmm

skerrywind · 02/03/2017 19:35

She actually has lots of options- but none of our business apparently.

chilledblain · 02/03/2017 19:47

Opal At least 3, for sole charge. But as au pairs are typically teenage babysitters, unqualified, they are best for wrap around care for school age. Typically, they should only do 20 hours per week light babysitting and housework.

An au pair is not appropriate for OP for a baby in a one bed flat!

Au pairs are not nannies on the cheap.

OpalFruitsMarathonsandSpira · 02/03/2017 19:52

Shock 3 years or 3 months?

minipie · 02/03/2017 19:53

3 years Opal.

Sweets101 · 02/03/2017 20:04

Fwiw my DC are desperate to share my room. My 8yo has basically moved into it with me and the others are quite jealous.
I really don't think sharing a bedroom is going to be a problem for years.

Original poster
Woulditbesilly · 02/03/2017 20:07

Skerry, well, no, tbh, they aren't. Not in a horrible way but I just wanted answers to the question, not opinions about whether or not I should be a single mum (which is basically the same as whether or not I should be a mum.) That I will decide for myself.

OP posts:
skerrywind · 02/03/2017 20:12

I don't see anyone judging you as a single mother- not something I have even commented upon.

flapinko · 02/03/2017 20:14

Well said OP.

Original poster
Woulditbesilly · 02/03/2017 20:16

Er - skerry - have you read the thread!?

OP posts:
chilledblain · 02/03/2017 20:21

skerry obviously has selective reading!

I'm an 'evil' single mother by choice. However I'm also a 'saintly' adopter.

FWIW, OP, I'm sorry you has to justify why you're not adopting on this thread, but it sounds like you've considered it, and wish to try for a birth child first, which is what most people do, and most people are allowed to do without pressure to adopt, just because they have a partner!

I hope all goes smoothly for you.

skerrywind · 02/03/2017 20:23

OP- yes I have thanks.

I find this thread very odd.

OP you have "left it too late" to have a partner with whom to have a child- why are your chances of conceiving not equally low?

You are not pregnant and you are thinking about furniture.

All seems a bit pie in the sky.

Lweji · 02/03/2017 20:24

'm sorry you has to justify why you're not adopting on this thread

The OP never had to justify why she's not considering adoption, FGS. She was asked if she was considering it, which is quite different.

Aliveinwanderland · 02/03/2017 20:25

At £40k you must take home around £1800 a month. A term time only childminder would cost you around £650 a month, less 20% if you do childcare vouchers as salary sacrifice. With council tax and bills I can't see how you would be short of cash!

Surely if you are mortgage free now that's a decent deposit to put down on a bigger place so you could aim for the mortgage to be only around 40% of the house which wouldn't cost much monthly. I think it must be doable surely?!

Original poster
Woulditbesilly · 02/03/2017 20:25

Well if you don't plan you're irresponsible - if you do it's pie in the sky!

I don't know how successful TTC is but that's true of most people. I'm 37 this year.

OP posts:
skerrywind · 02/03/2017 20:29

Aliveinwanderland

careful- that's none of our business.
OP wanted advice about bunkbeds, nothing more.

Those of us who have dared to suggest she thinks outside the box are to be reprimanded.

OP "can't move" and the reasons why are none of our business.

DianaMemorialJam · 02/03/2017 20:31

Op is the bedroom or living room big enough to partition to make two rooms?

Aliveinwanderland · 02/03/2017 20:31

Well then the answer to the question is yes of course it is physically positively for an adult and a child to share a bunk bed.

Whether it is the best course of action though is very questionable and I would encourage the OP to read all the replies and think about all the options.

DianaMemorialJam · 02/03/2017 20:31

Fwiw I think you're being sensible assessing your options before diving straight in. I hope it works out for you

Original poster
Woulditbesilly · 02/03/2017 20:32

skerry I honestly don't understand why you're being so rude!

I haven't said rudely it's none of your business but that doesn't change the fact it isn't.

I'd actually be grateful if you could maybe consider not posting here if it bothers you. I've had a dreadful day, and I really don't need daft arguments with people offended I'm not sharing the innermost details of a baby who may not even come to conception!

OP posts:
DianaMemorialJam · 02/03/2017 20:33

Sorry I see you were asked about converting on page 6! Ignore me Smile

AlmostAJillSandwich · 02/03/2017 20:34

If they have top bunk and wet the bed you might get an impromptu shower.

OhTheRoses · 02/03/2017 20:36

I don't know what's gone before but DH's grandad (b1909) was one of 9 and they grew up (well loved) in a two up two down with no bathroom or indoor facilities!