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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to be so upset and think they shouldn't have led me on

189 replies

Baybay16 · 22/02/2017 19:59

I was going through the process of adopting a romanian dog rescue. I have been putting off getting a dog for ages but finally decided after like two years when I saw this little puppy they posted.

I applied and was told I have been successful and they need to do a homecheck, I didn't get my hopes up too much as I have heard of people being unsuccessful from little things.

Just before the homecheck I was on their private secret fb group and commented that I was waiting for a homecheck, a volunteer replied that she was with the puppy that I applied for straight away, she sent me photos and said things like "you will fall in love with her when you see her" "she can't wait to come home to you". "Your puppy can't wait to see you" it was really nice of the lady and not going to lie got my hopes up.

Then the homecheck: the lady chatted away to me and at the end said 'I don't think there will be any problems, I will send off forms but I would prepare for puppy's name' if I were you '
We were still kind of holding our breaths at the this point but getting excited.

That night got a facebook message from homecheck lady who said thats the forms sent off, she said she can't wait to see my photos of the puppy and that she can puppy sit whenever I need.

Then yesterday got a phone call who said they won't let me have a puppy as I have stairs in my flat building and they don't think it would be a good idea for training. I explained that there will always be someone with her and we are dedicated to her training and my flat building is very small ( a terraced house converted into 6 flats on three floors ) there is probably more stairs in my mother's house than my flat building. She said she will discuss it with team and homecheck lady and get back to me as she think it would be a great home for the puppy we would be a great match and her heart is telling her yes.

Another phone call again today, it is definitely a no. She said since our check was overall good we can start the process for another dog but I feel disheartened by the whole thing. I would have never gotten my.hopes like this if it wasn't for everyone else sounding so sure.

AIBU to be so upset?? maybe I shouldn't have been so naive. Has this happened to anyone else ?

OP posts:
Thread gallery
7
TooExtraImmatureCheddar · 23/02/2017 20:32

Surely no one would get so bored of taking a puppy out to pee that they would let it pee in the flat? Makes no sense. It's either take the dog out to pee or it does it in the flat.

Original poster
Baybay16 · 23/02/2017 20:47

TooExtraImmatureCheddar exactly ! We specifically stated we had stairs too in the very first stages so it's all a bit weird

OP posts:
Resideria · 23/02/2017 20:49

Here are two of my Romanian rescues, who are severely lacking in the 'feral' or 'unsuitable for pet homes' department, despite having been picked up as stray dogs. They arrived in the UK neutered, wormed, and flea- and tick-treated and are the most loving companions.

AIBU to be so upset and think they shouldn't have led me on
AIBU to be so upset and think they shouldn't have led me on
Jaxhog · 23/02/2017 20:52

If you can get to London, try Battersea's dog home. Loads there.

It's always seemed unfair to only think to adopt a puppy, when there are so many lovely older dogs without homes. And why go abroad, when there are so many dogs that need loving homes here?

We've now adopted 6 cats from rescue places, and all have been wonderful. Some needed a lot more work to settle in, but all have responded to love and attention.

GardenGeek · 23/02/2017 20:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Evilstepmum01 · 23/02/2017 21:01

OP, if youre in the north of scotland, theres SSPCA thurso and inverness, munlochy animal aid, help 2 rehome scotland, Any dog'll do rescue has kennels on orkney, BAARK, Grantown Dog Rescue and Mrs Murray's in Aberdeen. (that I know of)

All of these rescues have dogs available for adoption and some can help with travel.

Good luck

magicgirl74 · 23/02/2017 21:11

Please try other rescues and please don't give up as you sound like you would provide a lovely home for a dog,The right furbaby is out there somewhere waiting for you xx

LooksBetterWithAFilter · 23/02/2017 21:42

Where about in the North of Scotland are you? City centre near beach I'm guessing Aberdeen rather than further north? I live further north and wanted to Reno even a dog a few years ago. Was an utter nightmare. Nobody replying to queries. One breed specific rescue were downright rude when I followed up one ignored enquiry and I was actually offering my time as well because I knew volunteers were scarce in the area.
If you are Aberdeen have you looked further North? Inverness and surrounding has a few dog shelters and it can be as cheap as £8 single for an advanced train ticket between Aberdeen and Inverness as well

YoPo · 23/02/2017 21:42

Have you tried Many Tears Animal Rescue, they have fosterers all over the UK and rehome all over the UK. Based in Wales. I hope you get your dog.

Strygil · 23/02/2017 22:28

AIBU to wonder if there are perhaps some Romanian children who would appreciate a good home?

If ever I read of a self-regarding first world problem I did so here.

Dear GOD.

Sallystyle · 23/02/2017 22:33

I think it's stupid that the stairs is an issue.

If some of these rescues weren't so strict they might find it easier to re-home dogs.

Of course some things are a deal breaker, however stairs? What am I missing?

car5ys · 23/02/2017 22:59

It's worth keep trying other rescues in UK. I have 4 cats and 2 dogs (all but 1 dog rescue animals) and that was with 2 kids of my own and multiple kids "visiting" daily. My brother wanted to adopt a kitten (already had rescue cat but was turned down by local national rescue but the same national rescue in neighbouring county allowed him to have one and she now lives with a dog as well. Use some of the help /ideas offered here and I'm sure there is a four legged furry out there just right for you.

Aeroflotgirl · 23/02/2017 23:08

How about The Dog Trust

Kt12x · 23/02/2017 23:14

Try breed specific rescues, they tend to have foster homes all over the uk and will move dogs about if they suit people! They do in our breed anyway! Worth a look if you know what your after. Good luck x

NoMudNoLotus · 23/02/2017 23:20

Stry ... the thread isn't about Romanian children though is it ? Hmm
What a ridiculous post !

NoMudNoLotus · 23/02/2017 23:22

Also wish people would rtft & not keep putting suggestions to poor OP that she has already acknowledged !

Mustang27 · 23/02/2017 23:58

I got a 6 week old puppy from my local dog shelter 13 years ago. He is perfect!! Rescue locally just put yourself on the puppy waiting list it may take time but if that's what you want the shelters will oblige.

AIBU to be so upset and think they shouldn't have led me on
Mustang27 · 23/02/2017 23:59

Oh yeah and I'm from a wee town in Scotland too they get plenty unwanted pups

DJBaggySmalls · 24/02/2017 01:08

Its shocking to spend hundreds of pounds importing a dog when so many are PTS here for lack of money.

mrsk247syd · 24/02/2017 06:24

@baybay16
My mum works volunteers for 'many tears' their head office is in wales but they send dogs everywhere - I mentioned your post to her and she said to contact them for sure😬😊

redthefraggle · 24/02/2017 06:33

Just a quick one; I can't recommend Dogs Trust highly enough and there are centres in Scotland, not sure where, but a quick look at their website will tell you everything you need.

redthefraggle · 24/02/2017 06:37

*Glasgow and West Calder

MsGameandWatch · 24/02/2017 06:54

You live in a flat, up a flight of stairs, in the city centre

So what? With commitment and full awareness of what you're getting into that doesn't matter a jot! Getting a suitable, usually small breed dog is key though, though from what I read on here greyhounds would probably be ok. I'm home all day as a carer and had my last dog for fifteen years, I have recently got another after my old boy passed away and it's working as well as the last dog situation did. I didn't find house training particularly taxing despite living in my crappy flat Hmm He was reliable within three weeks though "asking" to go out took longer. I knew what I was getting into and did what had to be done. He gets an hour out off lead in the morning and and hour out off lead in the afternoon. In between he's let into the communal garden every couple of hours. Generally though he goes wherever I go.

I just get really fed up with this because you live in a flat in a city you can't have a dog attitude on MN. It's simply not true and really unfair for people who cannot improve their living arrangements through no fault of their own. I'm a carer to two disabled children with little support, my boy gets me out and about talking to other dog owners and is wonderful company for me. He seems pretty pleased with his lot I have to say. Oh and no rescue would consider me either. I got him from the Champdogs website.

TheFirstMrsDV · 24/02/2017 07:52

Its shocking to spend hundreds of pounds importing a dog when so many are PTS here for lack of money

It cost about the same to adopt a dog from abroad as it does to get one from a domestic rescue.

They are not PTS for lack of money but for lack of homes. We were not permitted to home a dog from a domestic rescue because they will NOT rehome with children.

Are you suggesting that people should just take a dog from a domestic rescue even if it doesn't suit their family, home and lifestyle?

Why is it worse if an 'UK' dog is PTS than it is if a foreign one is PTS? Why is it worse that a 'UK' dog is in a pound than it is a foreign one is in a pound?
That is seriously f'd up thinking.

FucksSakeSusan · 24/02/2017 08:05

Some serious misinformation about SBTs in rescue from a PP. They are not ex fighting dogs - they are however the status dog of choice now many other breeds have been banned. They are overbred so there are too many of them and that's why there are such a large number in rescue.

Actually they are usually brilliant family dogs who love people.

Agree that the rescues are looking after the best interest of the dogs. Everyone wants a puppy, ideally, don't they - but there just aren't that many cute puppies being given up into rescue.

Also, if you're not able to travel, how are you planning to get your dog to the vet when it needs it?