AIBU to be so upset and think they shouldn't have led me on

[Baybay16]

I was going through the process of adopting a romanian dog rescue. I have been putting off getting a dog for ages but finally decided after like two years when I saw this little puppy they posted.

I applied and was told I have been successful and they need to do a homecheck, I didn't get my hopes up too much as I have heard of people being unsuccessful from little things.

Just before the homecheck I was on their private secret fb group and commented that I was waiting for a homecheck, a volunteer replied that she was with the puppy that I applied for straight away, she sent me photos and said things like "you will fall in love with her when you see her" "she can't wait to come home to you". "Your puppy can't wait to see you" it was really nice of the lady and not going to lie got my hopes up.

Then the homecheck: the lady chatted away to me and at the end said 'I don't think there will be any problems, I will send off forms but I would prepare for puppy's name' if I were you '
We were still kind of holding our breaths at the this point but getting excited.

That night got a facebook message from homecheck lady who said thats the forms sent off, she said she can't wait to see my photos of the puppy and that she can puppy sit whenever I need.

Then yesterday got a phone call who said they won't let me have a puppy as I have stairs in my flat building and they don't think it would be a good idea for training. I explained that there will always be someone with her and we are dedicated to her training and my flat building is very small ( a terraced house converted into 6 flats on three floors ) there is probably more stairs in my mother's house than my flat building. She said she will discuss it with team and homecheck lady and get back to me as she think it would be a great home for the puppy we would be a great match and her heart is telling her yes.

Another phone call again today, it is definitely a no. She said since our check was overall good we can start the process for another dog but I feel disheartened by the whole thing. I would have never gotten my.hopes like this if it wasn't for everyone else sounding so sure.

AIBU to be so upset?? maybe I shouldn't have been so naive. Has this happened to anyone else ?

Have you looked at Irish rescues? I often see local rescues sending dogs to the UK... Monaghan comes immediately to mind

I'm sorry you've had a bad experience. Please don't give up completely if they have cleared you for another dog - they just don't think your circumstances suit this one.
I have a gorgeous Romanian rescue dog and had a great experience so could point you in the direction of the Rescue we rehomed from (unless it's the same one and you got unlucky for some reason). I could also point you in the direction of adopting from NI if you are interested, as they are desperate to rehome dogs to the UK as the treatment there can be very poor.

Are people so desperate to adopt dogs from Romania they can refuse a good match purely on the basis they think you might get bored going up and down stairs to toilet train? who knew.

'The adult dogs are often feral and unsuitable for pet homes'

I work in rescue and can assure you that this is absolute rubbish!

I work with council pounds throughout the country finding places for their stray dogs so they are not put to sleep at the end of seven days. I also am responsible for placements and rehabilitating 'welfare cases'.

I can tell you from experience that euthanasia is utterly shit, it really is, and I cry my heart out for these poor abandoned animals every day. However, I promise you there is a fate much, much worse than being pts, something a lot of the horrifically abused animals we help would tell you if they could talk.

Sadly, a lot of these animals from abroad fit into this later category. These are dogs who live on the streets, are beaten, and left to freeze or starve to death without the help of kind rescues who do the best they can to save those most in need.

We live in one world, and no one animal is more important because they live in another country. They all live and breathe and feel pain just the same. In the rescue world we are always juggling how best to use resources. It is a horrible job, believe me, and we have to make heartbreaking decisions, but we do it to make sure we do everything we can to protect the most vulnerable and try to get as many animals into loving forever homes as possible. The number of animals rehomed into the UK from abroad is absolutely miniscule though in relative terms, and more often than not they're puppies from unplanned pregnancies where a bitch has been rescued and whose puppies wouldn't otherwise have a home and would almost certainly all perish without the intervention of their rescuers. Non-bull breed puppies (which is what a lot of them are) tend to be more in demand from people in the UK who would otherwise go out and buy a puppy, often unknowingly from back-yard breeders and puppy farms, so they aren't necessarily preventing a UK rescue dog from getting a home, simply because it's a slightly different market. The dogs are brought over here because there is absolutely nowhere safe for them in their origin country but they are often relatively easy to rehome here.

I'm so sorry you've been let down, OP. It sounds as though the temporary fosterer isn't actually a staff member at the rescue (that's normal) so she was out of line messaging you and getting your hopes up like she did. There must be more to it with regard to the stair issue, but not seeing them or knowing any of the facts I honestly don't know. Please don't let this put you off though! I know you must be incredibly upset and disappointed but there will certainly be lots of other wonderful dogs out there who would love to have a home with you! If you need any help please just shout. :)

Good luck! X

Op try many tears rescue they are based in wales but have dogs in foster homes all over the uk, the dogs are not puppies but ex breeding dogs who have come from puppy farms they are a fantastic rescue and from what ive heard the dogs though needing training in living in a normal home are some of the most loving dogs as they are grateful for the love you give them and they are pedigrees too so you can reserch breed characteristics

My boy came from Northern Ireland.

Aliceinunderpants that would be great thank you!!! Would love to rescue from anywhere so really not fussed any information would be really appreciated x

Baybay. She is an amazing family pet now and we love her dearly.
What breed are you looking at?
There are lots of breed specific rescues based in England.

Have you considered adopting a retired greyhound? When they've finished their racing career charities take them and find them homes.We are on our second greyhound and they make lovely pets and despite what a lot of people think they don't actually need much exercise(they are often referred to as 40 mph couch potatoes)When we adopted our first we lived in a small terrace house and thought we would be unsuitable as other dog rescues we visited wouldn't let you adopt if you had young kids or other pets.We contacted our local retired greyhound trust and they assured us no matter what people's situation was they could always find a greyhound to suit us.

Seriously op I don''t think a flat is a good place for a dog! Unless you have one that has direct access to an enclosed garden?

You sound lovely though x

WatchingIZombie very well said. Thank you ❤❤ x
isseywithcats thank you will have a look !! X

by the way i adopted a rescue hound dog from cyprus and she was absolutely lovely great with my cats my grandchildren and every one she met but yes when she first got here she had lots of issues, was scared ate her food at 100 knots a second, wasnt house trained but we got over most of her issues

TENSHI aw thanks x the flat has a huge shared garden on the bottom floor and we are a 10 minute walk from a huge park x my mams 2 golden retrievers stay with me every once in a while and love it here it's like their holiday home ha ha ! X

So many totally ignorant posts on this thread. It's so sad. :(

The VAST majority of animals that come into rescue do so through NO FAULT OF THEIR OWN. They are thoroughly assessed before being rehomed and are far more of a known quantity than animals you'd buy privately. You would not believe the number of animals that get dumped, for instance, just before people go away on holiday or when they get old, just so their owner can get a ShinyNewOne! when they return/fancy a change. It's disgusting. The problem is that we live in a throwaway society and these poor animals are one of the biggest victims!

magicgirl74 I actually did look into a greyhound rescue and read up that they were great dogs for a flat, I have a few pages on my fb that I will have a look through x thanks x

Aww, it sounds like a lovely home, OP! :)

(Second the greyhound suggestion. Total couch potatoes! )

I love that you want to rescue, and as much as I feel for the Romanian and other dogs - we have so many dogs in rescues already that they are being pts - please help those

ihatethecold we really aren't fussed. No breeds that need an extreme amount of exercise like huskies etc I actually have applied for a number of rescues and have been told I am on a waiting list but never really heard x

Well done for rescuing, so many people buy animals when hundreds of perfectly healthy ones are put to sleep everyday - pedigrees included. Makes me sick.

Good luck.

Have PMed you x

I would just like to say I tried to adopt a rescue in this country and was refused because I work . Not full time I may add. My first dog was a gumtree dog and 2 and half years old and the most wonderful dog he is now 13 and sadly has cancer . My second dog was rescued from Spain and again a lovely lovely dog. I have a large house , large garden and can afford dog walkers in the middle of the day and they get walked agin at 4.30 . In fact one rescue even refused me a cat because I work and I have had cats all my life ! Oh and I live next to farmland as well . And yet I could go and buy a puppy tomorrow. I did my research very thoroughly for my Spanish dog she had been fostered and I knew her background and she was fully vet checked . I could have afforded a designer dog in this country but prefer to rescue and donate to a good cause and personally I don't see it matters what country the dog comes from as long as you do your research.

Have you tried the dogs trust. We got ours from them last month (he is currently snoring next to me) Was very impressed with whole set up. Adoption fee was £120 and dog is vet checked and neutered. You have to do a min of 2 visits, home check in some cases and attend an advice class one evening plus prove you have registered him with a vet.

Many rescues would allow a dog to travel. Your post seems to suggest you want them to transport the dog to you. Don't think that'd be an option. You would have to visit the dog and collect it.
I'm afraid I agree with the rescue. Toilet training is hard work and can take a while. It could be a real issue if you can't get the dog straight out into the garden.
Black retriever x is an excellent rescue.

Lurcher is my recommendation. Or greyhound . Preferably one already toilet trained 🙂 . My Spanish dog is whippet spaniel terrier cross. And very affectionate and bright.