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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Don't even know if I'm asking AIBU - I don't know what to think! Postman!

208 replies

strawberrisc · 21/02/2017 13:59

I work in education so I am off work at the moment - along with my 13 year old daughter as it's half-term.

We've already been out for the last few days and so we're having a lazy day today before going out tomorrow. Despite stocking up she fancied a sandwhich with the one filling I don't have and I fancied a walk - albeit a 5 minute one. The shop is literally a 5 minute walk from our cul-de-sac.

I didn't lock the door because a) you can't break wind in this road without everyone knowing b) both sets of neighbours are in and b) I worry about locking the door and there being a fire.

I was gone less then 15 minutes. When I came back my daughter shouted, as I came in 'is that you? Someone opened the door and came in'. When I looked the postman had left a parcel in my hallway.

I don't know what to think for a number of reasons.

He's a decent guy and we've chatted on several occasions. He's been on this route for years.

But also: when I'm in work his collegue leaves one of those awful cards where I have to go all the way to the sorting office. However, this postman always leaves parcels in my lean-to between the wheelie bins. Why on earth would today be any different? It's a quite close so why would he even try the door and not leave the parcel in the usual place?

OP posts:

NavyandWhite · 21/02/2017 16:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheHedgehogCanNeverBe · 21/02/2017 16:34

Door did not need to be locked and I cannot see why people are so fixated on this. I'd do the same as you OP.
Postie should have knocked.

Floggingmolly · 21/02/2017 16:35

Why would you not just put a bolt on the door, bigears, so that nobody has to have the choice of being locked inside until someone unlocks the door from outside; or staying in a house open to whoever fancies strolling in?

Pigflewpast · 21/02/2017 16:40

Someone walked in. Daughter knew someone had walked in and was presumably scared? This time it was the postman. It could have been anyone. Navy's friend it was a thief. Many people near me, it was a thief. Remember couple of years ago a girl being taken from bath in downstairs bathroom whilst parents were in the next room.she was raped. Why wouldn't you lock the door? What's so hard about locking a door? Why do people think it's fine not to?!

NavyandWhite · 21/02/2017 16:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

lemondropcake · 21/02/2017 16:44

I'm a postie so can see it from his point of view. He thought he was doing you a favour/making life easier for himself too.
I personally wouldn't do it as I find it intrusive but because he's chatted to you before, he maybe felt you wouldn't mind.
I would just leave it and lock the door in future. He will know where he stands and you won't Need to confront him.

bigearsthethird · 21/02/2017 16:47

floggingmolly
Perhaps I didnt explain it very well, it is a weird setup! There is a bolt on the inside, so we can lock it with that when we are inside, like at night or whenever etc.
But if someone goes out and locks it from the outside, the person inside cannot open the door at all.
Likewise if someone inside locks it with the bolt, the person outside can't get in.

RebelRogue · 21/02/2017 16:50

OP are u sure u shut the door properly?
I came in from having a fag Sunday to find door wide open and the food delivery guy in the process of putting bags in the hallway. He did knock(i thought i heard something but wasn't sure) and as he did the door just opened wide for him. My door locks when shut so he didn't try or anything. OH just didn't shut it properly as he left.

Chloe84 · 21/02/2017 16:53

Are you the same poster who was annoyed a few days ago that the postman didn't leave a parcel in your lean to?

Areyoulocal · 21/02/2017 16:56

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mum11970 · 21/02/2017 16:58

Gees, I left my 12 year old for a couple of hours today and yesterday at home, with the door (horror of horrors) unlocked. Wouldn't cross the mind of any of us in the house to lock ourselves in. The postman popping a parcel in wouldn't bother me but we have dogs in the hallway so isn't an option for our postie.

NavyandWhite · 21/02/2017 17:01

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

diddl · 21/02/2017 17:05

"But if someone goes out and locks it from the outside, the person inside cannot open the door at all. "

Sounds like ours.

There's just a doorknob which doesn't turn on the outside, so even if the door isn't locked, you still need a key to get back in, although someone inside could just open it.

If it's locked form either the inside or outside then it can only be unlocked & opened with a key from either side.

strawberri-is it possible that the postman usually tries the door & only leaves the parcels outside when he can't leave them in?

Original poster

strawberrisc · 21/02/2017 17:06

Chloe84 Tue 21-Feb-17 16:53:47

Are you the same poster who was annoyed a few days ago that the postman didn't leave a parcel in your lean to?

Nope. This is my first OP. First and last.

OP posts:

Pigflewpast · 21/02/2017 17:09

I think you're right Navy about the "it won't happen to me". Guess that's what all the people it's happened to thought until it did. Bet it won't happen to them again, because now they'll lock the door. Shame all these people who'd rather not spend five seconds locking their doors will probably only learn the hard way too as obviously can't see the problem!

NavyandWhite · 21/02/2017 17:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster

strawberrisc · 21/02/2017 17:11

Yes. My first OP. Unless you're suggesting I'm a liar as well as the Rose West of all mothers.

OP posts:

ExitStage · 21/02/2017 17:12

Navy. Do you just leap on anyone that disagrees with you and bang on and on until they are beaten into submission?

NavyandWhite · 21/02/2017 17:12

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BertrandRussell · 21/02/2017 17:13

You have clearly not been watching the news lately , im pretty sure most of the awful crimes against children (and adults) this last year took no more than 15 mins to commit? Its frightening and its unfortunately reality"

In unlocked houses?

NavyandWhite · 21/02/2017 17:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TondelayaDellaVentamiglia · 21/02/2017 17:13

what are you looking for here OP?

Are you somehow insinuating the Postie is some sort of predator, trying the doors of people on half term to catch people out?

because you don't seem bothered about leaving the house unlocked or your child home alone so I am a quite a loss to work out your AIBU

Schwifty · 21/02/2017 17:15

"one of those awful cards"

So you're not happy for him to come in, but leaving cards is awful? I'm confused.

Original poster

strawberrisc · 21/02/2017 17:20

*TondelayaDellaVentamiglia

what are you looking for here OP?

Are you somehow insinuating the Postie is some sort of predator, trying the doors of people on half term to catch people out?

because you don't seem bothered about leaving the house unlocked or your child home alone so I am a quite a loss to work out your AIBU*

This is why this will be my only OP on this site. Did I insinuate the Postie was one of those 'Paedophiles around every corner?. Dear Lord, I welcome differences of opinion and I love a healthy debate but I've been likened to Kate McCann!

OP posts:

NavyandWhite · 21/02/2017 17:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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