AIBU in thinking this is not racist?

[KungFuPandaWorksOut16]

At a baby group, and one of the mothers starts commenting on a father who is there, mentioning how she wouldn't say no etc. Then asked what we think
One friend turned round and said no he isn't my cup of tea.
Original lady asked why
She responded she normally prefers white men, not black men.
Original lady tells her she should be disgusted in herself and having a view like that is highly racist. She then asked me do I agree if she was racist in what she said.

I told her I wouldn't view this as racist, just personal preference.
Is this actually racist? Or is original lady just being a bit over the top.

This is quite interesting - I would generally say I'm not attracted to black men - if I were to be asked - I actually have a preference for red heads which tends who strangely enough tend to be white.

But I have also dated black, mixed race and Asian men.

It a preference for me not something set in stone. I don't think that's quite the same as "I'd never date a black man/woman."

I've also known people who are white who almost always prefer black or Asian men. I think it's more what you are culturally conditioned/ exposed to the most to find attractive. The white friend I have that prefers black men for example grew up in an almost exclusively black area.

*who tend to be white

Wades in
Pats navy on back
Wades out

It's a very tasteless topic and pleased to see Blair Underwood got a shout out too ! I am sure he would do so deeply flattered to have his name mentioned on this thread

I've just read sibys1s post which is more articulate than mine.

I'm interested in the idea that it's a type of sub concious racism or bias that is shaped by your environment so much that in effect you may not be able to avoid it.

Why should any women be open to potentially having sex or a relationship with any man? Can people not see how offensive that is.

Women have every right to choose on any criteria they want to choose on.

I only fancy men with ducks and women with vaginas, now that's a statement that could get me accused of all sorts these days.

It's not racist, it's just personal preference. Weird comment to openly say at a baby group to people you barely know though, imagine if he'd heard.

I don't know any men with ducks but I love Aylesburys so that would be a bonus.

A black woman saying she isn't attracted to wi.hite men wouldn't be racist though [hmmm]
Every human is entitled to be attracted to whoever they choose. I don't know about all you but I don't have any control over who I'm attracted to, but I too tend to lean towards the white men, they just tickle my pickle more then black men. Christ your not even allowed to fancy a certain type of person without being called a racist these days. Absolutely ridiculous.

Italian you are missing the point spectacularly and somehow (how !) bringing in a feminist stance !

Is just the topic for me is distasteful - and many (not all ) of the comments on this thread - i.e.
"Once you've had black you'll never go back'
OOH i'd so do 'insert black attractive name ' and cover him in whipped cream

Blah blah bla

"Of course it's logical. The friend said she prefers white men over black men. Any black man."

I prefer men with short hair, that doesn't mean I fancy all men with short hair, of course I have other things to take into consideration...but they don't trump having long hair.

"So you think that everyone in the world has a type and sticks to it?"
Most people have a type, whether they're aware of it or not, and more often than not initial attraction conforms to that type.
It doesn't mean that you'd never be attracted to somebody who doesn't fit that type, only that it's much less likely.

NavyandWhite "Italian I just find it very strange that someone could rule out a whole race of people because they prefer someone white"

I have felt attraction for people of a variety of ethnicities but I find it very strange that anyone should want to shame anyone else for not being attracted to any person.

If the guy was white but the woman preferred black men, would it be ok for her to say, he's not my type, I prefer black men? Or if the woman was black and the guy white, for her to say she prefers black men or white men?

My white SIL prefers black men. In fact, she prefers any skin colour over white. She just says that she has never met a white man yet that she found attractive.

I have a preference for tall, dark, tanned athletic men with an accent. I am married to a short, skinny, mousy brown Londoner, who I fancy the pants off!

I just think it was a very strange conversation to be having at a baby group.

knitted those men with ducks.... Coe!

^Why should any women be open to potentially having sex or a relationship with any man? Can people not see how offensive that is.&

This.

There's e-fucking-nough pressure on women to be "fair" when dating and "give second chances". You don't have to justify not dating someone and you don't have to treat your love life as if you might risk a potential racial discrimination case at a Tribunal.

So what if a woman writes off a percentage of the male population without meeting them first? This is her personal life, she's not recruiting for a business!

The friend said she prefers white men over black men. Any black man.
She said she 'normally prefers' white men. 'Normally' and 'always' are different words that mean different things. She wasn't dismissing all black men just because they're black.

Just to drum this point home: whatever their ethnicity, men and women have a right to have their job applications fairly considered.

Whatever your ethnicity, you never have a right to be miffed that some women would automatically turn down your application to get in their pants.

Women are not obliged to be equal-opportunity sex dispensers.

I don't know. I guess I'd say that anyone writing off an entire race of people as romantic partners point blank probably has at least some barely concealed hangups on the subject. Might not be conscious but I'd definitely say it's there.

Navy, I guess we have stalemate. I don't think it is my job to police other women's sexual preferences.

Shout if you find my comments so difficult for any reason, you are welcome not to reply to them. I am a feminist and often see things from a feminist perspective. And ironically, where I grew up lots of white women had relationships with black men, including myself. What was less common was black women with white men. But no one here has even suggested men should be challenged on their dating or sexual preferences.

Wonder why this is? You could say because we are talking about a specific case! But it is also because, guess what, men are not talked into fancying or even pretending to fancy women they do not fancy! I'd say that was a feminist issue.

Rugbyplayersarehot
sweets people you don't want to know arnt people you don't want to fuck?

What?