Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

dh wants a threesome with his best friend's gf

227 replies

twoscompany · 28/02/2007 14:10

have changed my name for obvious reasons.

Me and dh have been together for 12 years, married for 8, we have a 4 year old dd. Have always had a great relationship, although I?ll admit that sexually I?m not as open-minded as some people are, but dh has always respected this.

However over the past year or so dh has been saying more and more that he would like us to have a threesome. To start with he said it jokingly, and I took it as such as he knows there?s absolutely no way I would go for it. But more recently he?s been saying more and more that he wants to have a threesome and is ignoring my attempts to laugh it off, saying that it should be his birthday present from me.

Then last night he said that I should invite a friend, who happens to be his best friend?s gf, over for the weekend, and he then said ?because she?s the one I think we should have a threesome with?.

I?ve pointed out that this isn?t going to do much good for dh?s friendship, but he said that I should be the one to ask her, that way his friend need never know. He?s also promised that he will give me the majority of attention and that he won?t actually have sex with her, but just wants her to be there.

Am I being selfish for not wanting to do this?

OP posts:
NomDePlume · 28/02/2007 15:46

MMJ, she says she is 34 on her profile, same age as you

TeeCee · 28/02/2007 15:46

bet he would!

UnquietDad · 28/02/2007 15:46

we'll have to get wannaBe to ask him and see...

expatinscotland · 28/02/2007 15:47

Nah, TC, I think maybe she should give him a bj WHILST he is snogging hte blow up doll.

Yeah, that sounds like fun!

They can maybe put a photo of the best friend's girlfriend over the blow up doll's face. To make it more real.

Or, he can use the blow up doll to similate a bj.

Yeah.

Pann · 28/02/2007 15:47

another vote for 'course he would'

ScottishThistle · 28/02/2007 15:47

I'd like to think I'm a grown up at 34!

Maybe it's just because I'm Scottish & I'm fun loving!

UnquietDad · 28/02/2007 15:48

I definitely go to the wrong pubs.

LowFatMilkshake · 28/02/2007 15:48

TC - if it's a birthday present he wants, buy yourself ome really nice underwear from la senza or where ever, wrap it up for him and tell him you are prepared to be a bit more adventurous in the bedroom (but only if you are) in return for him showing some sensitivity and droppping the whole threesome thing.

In support of the point made by UQD - in fantasy I think the idea of a threesome is quite exciting, but in reality if it ever happened (which it wont)it would be more likely to do my head in, make me my realtionship with DH, and in my case make my hung up on my too numerous to mention bodily imperfections

themildmanneredjanitor · 28/02/2007 15:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

wannaBeWhateverIWannaBe · 28/02/2007 15:48

but ud, most blokes who have these fantacies are in monogamous relationships no? and are faithful to their wives?

and surely it's just that? a fantacy?

because once you make it reality what is there to fantacise about?

NomDePlume · 28/02/2007 15:49

I did the snogging girls in pubs for a laugh thing, the difference is that I was 15 at the time.

zippitippitoes · 28/02/2007 15:49

I think fun loving and scottish is just slightly irrpoor excuse

themildmanneredjanitor · 28/02/2007 15:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

expatinscotland · 28/02/2007 15:49

Hmm, I live in Scotland. Can't say it's a Scottish thing to snog your mates in the pub.

Least not around these parts.

Punch, batter or slap the mate, yes. Snog, no.

ScottishThistle · 28/02/2007 15:51

Oh well, I don't fight with my mates & wasn't confident enough to snog my mates in the pub when I was 15!

themildmanneredjanitor · 28/02/2007 15:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

wannaBeWhateverIWannaBe · 28/02/2007 15:51

to the op - I would tell dh that I'd called the other woman and that she'd said "oh funny you should ring and say that, me and

expatinscotland · 28/02/2007 15:52

NDP
What exactly were you doing in a pub at 15?!

You should have been saying your prayers before bed, not in the pub at that hour!

zippitippitoes · 28/02/2007 15:53

I'm trying to think of a time in my life when I would have thought these were fun ideas

without needing drugs first

NomDePlume · 28/02/2007 15:54

I lived in a small Welsh market town, expat. There was bugger all else to do once you'd exhausted the underage sex and illegal drugs.

ScottishThistle · 28/02/2007 15:54

It's girls who snog their mates in the pub at 15 whom end up teenage Mums!

Funny none of my mates have issues in the bedroom with their OH wanting a threesome!

Pann · 28/02/2007 15:54

she was correcting the mistakes on the chalk boards. Probably...........

NomDePlume · 28/02/2007 15:54

lol at x posts, zippi !

NomDePlume · 28/02/2007 15:55

How exactly do you get pregnant from snogging girls in pubs ?

NomDePlume · 28/02/2007 15:56

Correctomundo Pann, my friend