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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think this parent is really grabby?

320 replies

MintLeafTea · 10/02/2017 11:53

NC (is that you UCM) red rug/Titania/clay of cock.

My ds go to a local scout group. They run loads of events. Another parent used to go in and help out and she'd take photos for the newsletters and social media. She also used to e mail us digital photos.

She still helps out but in the newsletter there is a link and she is now selling all her photos.

AIBU to think she's only doing this to boost her business and I should tell her I want my children exempt from having their photos taken unless I can have copies (in lieu of modelling fees)

OP posts:
PoorYorick · 10/02/2017 12:30

any idiot can take a photo if you have all the right equipment.

So do it yourself and set up as a professional if it's that easy. Do you know anything about photography?

Efferlunt · 10/02/2017 12:31

As leader If this was happening in my group id want to know and would speak to our district guy to check out what the guidance was. Think you should make leaders aware.

arethereanyleftatall · 10/02/2017 12:31

Then, in reference to your title, no she's not being grabby, you are.

Crispbutty · 10/02/2017 12:32

Get a better camera then and take them yourself as its so easy Grin

brasty · 10/02/2017 12:32

£10 will pay for her time to sort out the best photos, and upload them, and then email them to the parent. Plus any materials. That is why it is so cheap. I suspect she was feeling taken for granted, which reading this OP, I can understand why.

Original poster
MintLeafTea · 10/02/2017 12:33

The prints on her website are usually £15 for a 10x8 so I bet the fiver is going to the group.

I will enquire. Maybe I can hire a camera and help out for a few sessions and charge £5 for my photos.

OP posts:
HelenaGWells · 10/02/2017 12:34

Photographers shouldn't have to give all their time and work for free but at the same time I think suddenly without warning charging for something like this is not good practice.

Usually chargeable photos would be agreed in advance. It's not about working for free it's about moving the goalposts.

I am in this industry fyi and I consider this shortsighted and likely to just get peoples backs up. If you don't want to do it for free now then just step back and don't do it or talk to the parents about it first. Don't just chuck up a paywall with no warning.

trinketsofgold · 10/02/2017 12:34

Go for it OP, let us know when you've recouped your cost and what your hourly rate works out as.

Oh and how many people still buy the more professional prints over yours

Quintessing · 10/02/2017 12:34

Who profits from the photos taken at the group? She? The group?

I am in two minds about this, if SHE is profiting.

On the one hand, she is making money out of the group.

On the other, she is a dedicated helper, who provides an additional paid for service that people are free to use if they want to. Nobody are obliged to buy photos. The added bonus is that professional pictures are used for the groups social media presence and marketing.

In summary, I actually dont think there is something wrong with what she is doing.

GinIsIn · 10/02/2017 12:34

There's a real level of spite to the way you talk about this. anyone can hold a camera and take a photo, planning to withdraw permission so it's harder for everyone else to get group photos.... The person who sounds grabby here is you. You are throwing your toys out of the pram because you are to cheap to pay for the service so instead you belittle her work and try to spoil it for other parents? Nice! Hmm If you don't want to pay, don't buy the photos. It's up to you. There's no need to be a dick about it.

LoudBatPerson · 10/02/2017 12:34

I didn't say the photos are rubbish. They are very good. I just don't want to pay when I've had them for free.

Then don't pay for them. I imagine the photographer doesn't want to give up all of her time sorting out photos for individual parents for free anymore.

Itmustbemyage · 10/02/2017 12:35

Sorry I think I misunderstood the issue.
My advice up thread was really aimed at someone who had a concern about photos of their children being distributed without their knowledge, which can be dangerous to families in certain circumstances. ( I have experience of this within my family). Also I work for a company organising children's events and we would never distribute photos of children without full photo permission.
I see now that the issue is more about access and cost of the photos and I think charging is acceptable or take you own photos.

SalmonFajitas · 10/02/2017 12:35

I don't think I could get myself worked up about this. At least she volunteered and did her bit for the scout group. As long as there is no pressure to buy the photos and you're free to the your own photos I'd just shrug it off.

My Son's school events always have a professional photographer with photos you can buy - some parents (like me because I don't have a nice camera and I suck at photography) buy them others take their own. (Some parents even turned up to the whole school photograph and took their own snap so they didn't need to buy from the school - no one had a problem with this).

twattymctwatterson · 10/02/2017 12:35

Reverse. Op is being too goady for anything else

Quintessing · 10/02/2017 12:35

any idiot can take a photo if you have all the right equipment.

I am sure I could write a best selling book. After all I can spell. Somewhat.

PoorYorick · 10/02/2017 12:36

Maybe I can hire a camera and help out for a few sessions and charge £5 for my photos.

Please share a few on here, with faces obscured, so we can see how talented you are.

HelenaGWells · 10/02/2017 12:36

Also you won't get the same results by "just hiring a camera" it is a skilled profession. There are just better ways to get paid for your time than doing this in this manner.

budgiegirl · 10/02/2017 12:36

I think you are being a bit unfair to the photographer. For a while, she was giving up her time, and providing a nice service, for free. you were lucky that she did this.

Now she's decided to charge. Fair enough, she's not forcing you to buy them. It's up to you if you do or not.

I can understand that some parents wouldn't want to give their permission for photos of their children to be taken at an event. But if you were happy to do so when the photos were free, then it's clearly not a child protection issue for you. So to withdraw your permission now, while clearly within your right to do so, does come across as sour grapes.

It''s not like other parents are going to buy photos because your DC are in them, they'll be buying the photos with their DC in, do you really object to your DC being in the background?

Chelazla · 10/02/2017 12:36

You sound grabby tbh! Now you can't have them for free you're spitting your dummy out. Trying to make her life hard by with drawing consent and insulting her profession! Nice!

Original poster
MintLeafTea · 10/02/2017 12:36

She did tell us she was going to have to charge when she kept being asked by other parents to bring her camera in. I didn't think the other parents were going to pay.

OP posts:
witsender · 10/02/2017 12:38

You're not very bright are you? Being a photographer is more than just pointing and clicking. Are you good with light? Exposure? Apertures? Editing?

Yabu, she's not grabby...You are. You liked getting her photos for free, BT are being snide now because she (reasonably) wants paying. By all means don't buy them.

Original poster
MintLeafTea · 10/02/2017 12:38

She's getting great photos of MY children and I considered that in return (my children modelling for her) I would t have to pay

That is not grabby.

OP posts:
arethereanyleftatall · 10/02/2017 12:38

Ah yes twatty. That makes sense. Good spot. An op which could go either way, and then with each subsequent post the op looks more and more unreasonable, whilst the photographer gets better.
Fess up op, are you the photographer?

Callaird · 10/02/2017 12:38

In the United Kingdom there are no laws forbidding photography of private property from a public place. Photography on private land is not restricted if the landowner has given permission. However, landowners are permitted to impose any conditions they wish upon entry to a property, including forbidding or restricting photography.

If the scout leader has given her permission to take the photos, she can take the photos. You can ask her not to take photos of your child, however be aware that your child may be excluded from certain things where he may get caugh by the camera. No group shots with your child in. She can also sell these photos to anyone she wants. If you don't want to pay, don't pay. Photographers get paid a great deal of money to take photos (I charge between £2 and £10 per photo and more if they want prints. I also compress my photos so that only print of 7x4 can be printed clearly.) My brother even tried to pay me as he knows I charge others.

Photography of certain subject matter is restricted in the United Kingdom. In particular, the Protection of Children Act 1978 restricts making or possessing pornography of children under 18, or what looks like pornography of under-18s. There is no law prohibiting photographing children in public spaces.

livefornaps · 10/02/2017 12:39

I think that's a very nasty attitude towards a small business holder. No one's making you buy the photos and they are password protected online. Like others have said, she will have taken the time to sort, and possibly retouch the photos and maintain her equipment. This reminds me of when creative people are offered "opportunities" for "exposure" and are effectively asked to work for free. You are under no obligation to give her any money - she hasn't asked anything of you she's just offered you some photos that you can choose to buy or not. Everyone has to eat!