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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To potentially get our postman fired

289 replies

Bearsinmotion · 08/02/2017 21:11

DP is a camera geek. On the weekend he bought a camera trap for catching wildlife in the garden. He wanted to test it out so set it up by the front door so he could test it by the kids going in and out. It's been there since Sunday.

So this evening he had a look at the footage with DD(5). There's us, there's the cat, there's the postman. Oh look, there's the postman having a piss against our garden wall Shock.

Our door is round the side of the house, so out of sight from the road. There's the door, the path next to the house, a small patch of grass and the neighbours wall. He literally posted a letter, turned round, knob out, pissed all over the grass and wall. Knob away, off to post more letters, obviously without washing his hands. Envy

It was done so casually it's hard to believe he's not done it before. On the plus side, he posted our letters first so that won't be covered in piss Grin. But seriously, who would do that?!

Thing is, we're in a village where everyone knows each other, and he's been the postie for years. But IANBU to report him and potentially get him sacked am I?! I have a slight pricking of my conscience if he did lose his job, but surely that's his problem, not mine?!

OP posts:
Original poster
Bearsinmotion · 08/02/2017 22:27

No control issues here. DP wanted it somewhere he knew there would be movement to check it works, he'll move it to the garden on the weekend.

I don't think we do need to inform people as the camera is on our property and very low down (fox height!) so it does not view any of our neighbours or public property.

He hasn't been our postie for years, we've not lived here long. And we're never in during the day so would never get the chance to knock and ask to use our loo. He could easily ask other neighbours that he will have known for ages and who are at home every day.

OP posts:
GeorgeTheHamster · 08/02/2017 22:29

Don't report him, what does it achieve?
You want him to stop, so leave him a note asking him not to pee in the garden again.

Needastrongone · 08/02/2017 22:31

OP, just report him. All your posts indicate that this is what you want to do. Most posters in general (whether they agree or not with his actions) are saying don't, maybe leave a note, but you seem fairly content with how you feel. So why start an AIBU, just report him.

ph0ebe · 08/02/2017 22:31

Please dont report him op, yes its not nice but it would be worse of you to report him. Have a sense of humour & put up a sign (or just talk to him??) he won't do it again obviously so what's the point in getting him sacked?

Needastrongone · 08/02/2017 22:32

And yes, I can tell from your posts that this isn't a community that you have lived in for all that long.

statetrooperstacey · 08/02/2017 22:33

I can tell you with 100% accuracy that female Posties do piss anywhere they can. What do you think they do if they are out all day with no toilets? Just Sellotape a note on your letterbox that really is all you need to do.

bumsexatthebingo · 08/02/2017 22:34

If you do report him I would say you saw him do it in a neighbours garden if you are overlooked then he won't know it was you. Otherwise if he gets sacked he might come back and leave you a present Grin

BitOutOfPractice · 08/02/2017 22:36

And op it would be weird to report him

Verbena37 · 08/02/2017 22:36

Surely if it's a village, he has a post van?
In which case, he can park it discreetly next to a hedge down a lane and do a pee there I wouldn't think there would be a need to wee in someone's garden and wang your willie around really. Perhaps he thought you were in Wink

DevelopingDetritus · 08/02/2017 22:38

He should keep a bottle in his van to pee in, I think that's what some taxi drivers do.

Booshbeesh · 08/02/2017 22:38

Oh my god i would so report thay dirty bastard. I bet if was a woman squating on her lawn u would all say report her! Thats gross. Tell his manager. Long time postie or not. He can p without gettinf his hands dirty? Oh great maybe he banged the local bike last night barebak and instead has just transfered shecum onto you letter for.ur lively 18 month old child to run and pick up coz its just fallen through the god damn door. REPORT HIM.

ShesAStar · 08/02/2017 22:38

I'd keep the camera where it is for another 2 weeks. If he has another wee in that time I'd think we had an issue, otherwise I'd think 'dirty bastard' and leave it at that.

seabreezewavingtrees · 08/02/2017 22:39

Grim. Sorry thats happened to you op
But I thought this thread was going to be about him stealing from you or being aggressive or something. Do you really want him to be fired? To have no job? It would take a lot for me to want somebody to lose their job, that's someone livelihood. It's not easy to just walk into a job, especially after being fired. I'd worry about how that person would then support themself and their family; they might have huge financial burdens, their sense of self worth might be derived from their job, they might seep into depression. Seriously I'd think long and hard before trying to have such an effect on someone's life because they were caught short. I lived on Notting Hill Carnival route, I've caught people being caught short; it's not nice but having the local postman fired? Eek

5OBalesofHay · 08/02/2017 22:40

You wouldn't really lose him his livelihood over this with just a pricking of your conscience would you?Shock

I wish you karma.

PunkrockerGirl · 08/02/2017 22:43

Nearest public toilet is easily 50/60minutes walk from where I live. How many of us would be able to manage that if we were already bursting for a wee with no van to help us out?
I bet the majority of pearl clutching hysterics on here have easy access to toilets during their working day Hmm

Rachel0Greep · 08/02/2017 22:44

Put up a sign about CCTV and hopefully that will be the end of the problem.

Verbena37 · 08/02/2017 22:44

He is a man...there must be lots of lanes and hedges etc in a village....or village hall/pub/farm shop etc.

HopelesslydevotedtoGu · 08/02/2017 22:44

I love mumsnet

Some posters want to invite him inside for a respectable wee
Another to report him for grooming
And another knows someone who shat on a customer's roof

ScarletSienna · 08/02/2017 22:44

Leave a note, he'll feel duly embarrassed and won't do it again. What more are you hoping for?

CoolCarrie · 08/02/2017 22:46

FFS! Do you really want someone to lose their job over a wee? isn't getting a job hard enough at the moment, with zero hours, no sick pay, ffs give the guy a break. Speak to him and tell him what happened, accept his apologies and leave it, he isn't going to do it again after that!

scootinFun · 08/02/2017 22:46

Don't report him; just pop up a notice asking him not to pee and that the garden is being filmed. I bet he'll steer clear after that. Don't witter on either about how all the neighbourhood kids have had a gander at his todger as a) it's untrue and b) it'll definitely get him sacked.
I assume your end goal is to stop the piddling not destroy his livelihood yes?

jcne · 08/02/2017 22:46

Ew! I would certainly dob him in (a) for being a dirty pig and (b) because this is potentially a staff welfare issue that RM should be forced to address and cough up the provisions for

ladymariner · 08/02/2017 22:46

Bloody hell op, you sound hard work. Grow up, leave a note out and tell him you know what he's done and no way is it to happen again. And then settle down, rearrange your pearls or something, perhaps think about someone with a real problem......you'd really report him, possibly get him fired....wow!

And booshbeesh isn't it past your bedtime?

AlmostAJillSandwich · 08/02/2017 22:46

Shinynewusername, urine is not sterile. The average person has around 30 strains of bacteria in their urine, good and bad like in the gut.
People prone to recurrent UTI have closer to 70 strains, and theres 4 strains exclusively in the bladders of women who suffer from over active bladder syndrome.
People ASSUME (wrongly) that urine is sterile because a urine test for bacterial infection comes back negative when the number of bacteria is under a certain threshold. It doesn't mean there isn't bacteria (there is LOTS) but that there isn't enough BAD bacteria to cause an infection.

YouWillNotSeeMe · 08/02/2017 22:46

Surprised at the number of people who thinks this is ok.
He is in a van, he could piss in the van in a bottle or urine bottle etc, up against your wall is grim.