Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be shm after children are at school

921 replies

Notthinkingclearly · 05/02/2017 17:45

I have 2 dc who are 6 and 9. Since my first child was born i have been a stay at home mum. My DH works away alot abroad so I am often on my own. My Dc's have not been the most robust and have both had quite a few weeks off school with legitimate reasons over the last few years with hospital appointments. I have felt that if I had been at work I would have been a rubbish employee. I seem to be really busy all the time but feel I am constantly justifying to everyone why I don't have a job. I look after a relations 2 year old one day a week, help in school one day a week and I am a member of the schools PTA. I don't go out apart from supermarket or a walk during the week and only ever sit down to eat my lunch during the day. Am I as spoilt and lazy as I am made to feel?

OP posts:
NataliaOsipova · 08/02/2017 12:35

I think you're right, bullet. In fact, you're a genius. Whereabouts are you? Do you think you could put in a good word for me with your boss? Grin

gillybeanz · 08/02/2017 12:38

Time

That's so funny Grin

In fairness though, I guess some people if only a few are paid to Mnet.
I suppose I am in a way, as my dh through his business pays me a wage to book keep, manage office etc. Before I started my pt job, I used to Mnet alot through the day.
As a ll I'd be earning money from rent whilst I was Mnetting.

Time4adrink · 08/02/2017 12:43

Thanks gillybeanz

Sorry, WizardSally but surely you saw this coming?

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2839779-To-Ask-My-Boss-Why-He-Doesnt-Like-Me

Could it be because you are always on MN? Biscuit

bulletjournal · 08/02/2017 12:47

Forget about my job, I need to know what career WizardSally is into. Where can you get a six figure salary, working 9 to 5, with at least 13 weeks off a year and all the weekends and spending your day MNing drinking tea and eating cake, whilst looking down at the plebe.

Do MPs work 9 to 5? Someone in the Royal Family?

bulletjournal · 08/02/2017 12:50

Time4adrink

that is so funny! Grin Grin Grin

On a more serious note, it proves my earlier point. I much prefer employing someone after a career break than someone with experience but an awful attitude problem.

gillybeanz · 08/02/2017 12:53

Wizard
So you pick on others for not working because you are unfulfilled in life.
I feel sorry for you, it can't be easy having to do a job you don't like.
However, that is not the fault of every sahp.
Take some responsibility and improve your life the way you want it to be.
You only get one shot at life.

piefacerecords · 08/02/2017 12:54

Ooh time that's bad form you know Shock

DoReMeFaBlaBla · 08/02/2017 12:56

Bad form or not it's hilarious

Time4adrink · 08/02/2017 12:56

piefacerecords?

piefacerecords · 08/02/2017 12:58

Time?

bulletjournal · 08/02/2017 12:58

It's not good form to try to put down other people, insult them and ridicule them when they have made other choices. When someone is so fierce in her arguments, you can't help wonder how real they are.

I hope Sally will consider a career change and improve her own life instead of wasting time and energy trying to bring other people down.

Time4adrink · 08/02/2017 13:00

piefacerecords bad form?

I don't post very often so please explain - thanks

piefacerecords · 08/02/2017 13:02

Oh, ok, it's generally seen as a no no' to search a poster's history then quote them in a separate thread to argue a point on a different one...

Tho let's be honest, this thread had gone down the pan way before that happened Grin

RhodaBull · 08/02/2017 13:04

I think there are real Wizardsallys out there.

Woman up the road - a consultant - eyed me with scarcely-disguised contempt when I said I didn't work. She then sneered, "I could never let my brain atrophy." Meanwhile her mother turns up every day at 7.30am to look after her gc, sits in her dd's house all day and goes home after 5pm. Presumably she thinks her own mother is brain dead too.

Time4adrink · 08/02/2017 13:05

Thanks pie wasn't aware of that.

LexieB · 08/02/2017 13:07

The people on that post called Wizard arrogant & needy!! she is moaning about her colleague for being obese!!! at least she is at work you would think Wizard would be happy with that!! Sounds like there are being people that wind up the 'Wizard'.who actually does not seem to come across as a very nice person!

piefacerecords · 08/02/2017 13:08

No problem - and if you're interested, no I'm not pregnant Wink

gillybeanz · 08/02/2017 13:09

I gave a woman a black eye to go back to work with one day, during her lunch hour.
It wasn't my finest hour but I'd taken weeks of abuse from her, until I snapped.
She sounded just like Wizard, but spouted her rubbish in rl.
My dd was a baby at the time so I turned her buggy round and smacked her one, her colleagues weren't surprised, which speaks volumes.

piefacerecords · 08/02/2017 13:11

Whaaaaaat? Confused

Did she prosecute then?

BoboChic · 08/02/2017 13:12

Rhodabull - there's a particularly unpleasant sort of woman who looks down on other's achievements and basks in her own while seemingly unaware that her own mother is picking up all the pieces for her and keeping her domestic and child raising show on the road. They are tough to talk to because they are very immature.

LexieB · 08/02/2017 13:17

Think Wizard must be getting on with some work now

Original poster
Notthinkingclearly · 08/02/2017 13:23

No idea when I started this thread that it would be so emotional. I haven't had time to read all comments - been very busy being a sahmSmile What I would like to ask Wizzard is - does your partner help alot at home with chores and child care.?As stated before my DH is away alot so it really is just me. I totally get there are alot of single mums who work and I have the upmost respect for them but not sure i should be so frowned apon if I don't have to work for financial reasons. My mum was a sahm when we were at primary school and I certainly don't think she was a bad role model for me.

OP posts:
gillybeanz · 08/02/2017 13:24

pieface

She wouldn't have dared, she kept saying horrible things about women not working to her co workers.
I'd be pushing dd through town, I used to go at the same time as lots of people about, great for socialisation with the older people for dd whom they loved Grin.
This happened for weeks, she'd say it in a loud voice quite close to me.
All the stuff you usually hear like lazy scrounger etc.
One day after having little sleep and being a bit overwhelmed with it all, I smacked her.
As I say, not my finest hour, but there's no reason to be so nasty to people you don't know.

LillyGrinter · 08/02/2017 13:29

I'm a working mum but I've been upset by Wizardsally 's comments. Quite glad to see the bully brought down

MommaGee · 08/02/2017 13:31

The difference being I'd never have to think about that. I wouldn't have had dc if I couldn't provide for them on my own without the financial backing of another human or on the back of another human's death

Sp of the DH ran off with the secretary tomorrow and the emotional stress of it caused a breakdown resulting on you losing your job would you hand over full custody of the kids cos he could provide for the 100% and you couldnt?
We're all only a few steps away from the last pay cheque. perhaps you've got enough in savings to last you not to work for the next 15 years

Or are you independently wealthy and therefore could afford them without working hence only the very rich should be allowed to procreate?

Swipe left for the next trending thread