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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think double barrel surnames all sound stupid and there's just no need for it?

476 replies

ExpectoPatronummmm · 05/02/2017 11:31

I realise I will offend all you double barrellers
But why?
Do you realise it's a mouthful and makes you look like you're trying to be some kind of lord or lady?
What's wrong with one surname?
When I marry my OH i'lol take his surname. I won't just add it to mine and cause an unnecessarly long name to have to say/write/spell.

I think they make you look like a pleb.

OP posts:
Camomila · 06/02/2017 00:13

Just counted on my fingers...DSs double barrelled surname is 15 letters long. Ah well Grin

JassyRadlett · 06/02/2017 00:14

You missed my honest apology for that comment when Diana called me on it.

Ah well. Never mind.

Ellle · 06/02/2017 00:18

True, those are not the only options, just a few examples.

I read the article you linked to. I came across to one I hadn't heard before with regard surnames (meshing), but was commonly used in my country for first names.

Ellle · 06/02/2017 00:21

Don't worry Camomila, I counted my DSs double barrelled surname and it is 16 letters long! Beat you by one! Wink

JassyRadlett · 06/02/2017 00:22

I'm getting an inferiority complex over here, the DSes only have eight. Grin

BlondeBecky1983 · 06/02/2017 00:26

In my experience it's more indicative of unmarried parents nowadays, as others have said. Each to their own though. I do feel for kids who are poor spellers though. Grin

bowed · 06/02/2017 00:31

You missed my honest apology for that comment when Diana called me on it.

I really don't care that you back tracked on being called out on it. 'Catching a man' indeed.

JeanLouise123 · 06/02/2017 00:36

Joining the competition, my child's name is 18 long. Do I win? Grin

Also in response to Headofthehive55, neither of the grandparents are apparently bothered by our choice of name to "pass on". My dad was particularly supportive and cool with it despite me dropping "his" family name.

Also this: The Jeanlouise post only gives one example also. I really can't see a decent one, but I'm still looking now

Lol It's not only decent, but a perfect example surely!?

JassyRadlett · 06/02/2017 00:42

Oh I see. You're one of those.

Night then.

bowed · 06/02/2017 00:42

Jeanlouise, your example, while fine, was the same as the other poster's Spanish example. There are many options, only one or two to be found on this thread. Hence my quick post and link.

Lol?

bowed · 06/02/2017 00:54

You're one of those holds those low opinions about other women, then spouts the bile about their name choices, and so are as bad as the OP. So I really don't care about anything you have to say.

JassyRadlett · 06/02/2017 01:07

Yes, I can see that. You've said it quite a few times.

There are those who can't understand that there's a difference between 'backtracking' and a sincere apology. They're generally those who can't ever admit they've been wrong, or made a mistake, or said something they didn't mean. I try very hard not to be one of those people, which may be why I think I'm the only person on this thread to have apologised for saying something crappy that I didn't mean.

Glad you have such an insight to my thoughts and soul, considering you have no interest in me. Quite impressive. Enjoy your pedestal - the view must be nice. Careful not to fall. Smile

JeanLouise123 · 06/02/2017 01:07

Ah read the link, I am guilty of being a thread skimmer. And yeah there are many "options". I was addressing the numberous ridiculous questions and comments about what DB parents will possibly do when having children if not quad barreling with my own example.

Admittedly, I know no other couples in real life that are not from Latin America/Spain which have done the same.

bowed · 06/02/2017 03:08

I have no interest in or knowledge of your thoughts other than those vile thoughts you typed about women using Mrs and their husband's surname, as advertising they'd managed to catch a man. You may be sorry now, as coming out with that kind of opinion doesn't cast you in a good light and makes you as bad as the Op. I don't find the sudden u turn in opinion believable or sincere.

Actually I think I do recognise your name from my violin thread. Oh dear what a horrible thought but I don't think you said anything particular or offensive.

I can see why nobody challenged you about your comments earlier. I've had several childish replies from you since, really quite intense in style too. I'd like you to leave me alone now.

DameSquashalot · 06/02/2017 06:44

I object to being told I am wrong for wanting to take my DP's surname when we get married. He most certainly does not own me. My DD has his surname. We both wanted that. My surname is boring and common. I don't particularly care for it.
*
I don't give a shit what other people do with their surnames. I am for choice. I will defend a woman's choice over her surname. But do not insult and judge my choice and call it feminism!*

⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️⬆️ this

MumOfTwoMasterOfNone · 06/02/2017 07:01

Ha! My children have both our surnames double barrelled as we aren't married. It's not to be pretentious, but I didnt want a completely different surname to my children, nor did my partner.
If we ever did get married (not likely) I would probably double barrel my name. I just feel like it is such a part of my identity.

DianaMemorialJam · 06/02/2017 07:01

bowed in all fairness to Jassy she took it on the chin and apologised. I think when people are openly critical and, frankly, plain rude about your lifestyle choices it can make you understandably defensive.

I thought her apology was genuine, and aside from that tiny comment she has articulated herself well and has been pretty measured. You're just sounding a wee bit childish now.

DorkusDelonghi · 06/02/2017 07:07

No, no, Diana on this thread, double- barrelled names aren't being styled as pretentious but rather as downright plebeian.

As commented upthread:

In mind mind double barrel names go with net curtains, serviettes and package ski holidays.

Now, come on, fess up, you know you have net curtains, right? Wink

JassyRadlett · 06/02/2017 07:08

Diana, I'm willing to accept that my behaviour has consequences and if one of those is that she (assumption) thinks badly of me, then it is what it is.

Thank you though, you've been really gracious and I reiterate that I appreciate you calling me out on what was a shitty thing to say that I threw off as a bit of cheap rhetoric when I felt goaded. Some good lessons on this thread!

DianaMemorialJam · 06/02/2017 07:24

Dorkus I ACTUALLY have net curtains! In real life! Am I in some sort of club now? I'm not even going to pretend... I love my nets. Total curtain twitcher here!

Jassy the thing is that you often find on here one could be the paragon of virtue otherwise, but god forbid you say something 'in the heat of the moment' and you are branded for it. Luckily mumsnet doesn't imitate real life and we are allowed to make mistakes eh.

This thread is making me envious I don't have a db name! Mine is just a very boring 4 letters.

Only1scoop · 06/02/2017 07:29

Jassy I felt your apology genuine too.

It's going a bit around the houses now.

JassyRadlett · 06/02/2017 07:30

I've got you beat, Diana, mine is only 3! Though I do get the kids' last name sometimes now the elder has started school.

DianaMemorialJam · 06/02/2017 07:33

jassy we have been short changed here. I want AT LEAST 8 letters.

Only1scoop · 06/02/2017 07:36

"In mind mind double barrel names go with net curtains, serviettes and package ski holidays"
Great name Mind-Mind
Maybe triple barrel with Neilson?

5OBalesofHay · 06/02/2017 07:38

What about those whose family have been double barelled for generations? Do you despise them OP ?